AIBU to ask neighbour to move their newly erected trampoline?

[larks35]

I haven't asked yet as they put it up yesterday for their DS's birthday and then had a party. But, would ibu to ask them to move it to the other side of garden. At the moment it is at the bottem of garden on a raised wooden platform next to our garden. We have two problems with this:

1. We've created a lovely little seating area at bottom of garden, having planted trees etc. to make it private. This is now overlooked and disturbed by anyone on the trampoline (yesterday I found myself being checked out by a bloke while I breastfed DD!)

1. DS 3yo loves, loves, loves trampolines but we love, love, love our cottage-style garden and don't want one. This is now in constant view to DS and is likely to cause more badgering.

I was thinking of asking her to either move it to the other side of garden OR further up the garden so it isn't raised and doesn't overlook our usual seating area. I'm a bit crap at any sort of confrontation so just thought I'd gather your opinions on whether or not this would be unreasonable.

Tis very funny, the outrage that you are somehow infringing your child's basic human rights by not having a trampoline!
When did kids get so entitled, that something which used to only be found in a shared sports hall HAS to be provided per child in their own garden?
And Freddos you are quite wrong to say the OP has to put up with anything people choose to do in their own garden.
Trampolines may not fall into this category but there are any number of situations where the legal definition of nuisance could be caused and people can be required to desist.

Laurel hedges grow well. High too.

Your poor ds, what a selfish attitude.

Newgirl I would imagine the family with the trampoline could have cause for complaint having to put up with OP and her family sitting around chatting right next to their trampoline.
Just because she got there first doesn't give her overriding rights to that area.

Thanks all for replies. TBH our main objection is point 1, point 2 is irrelevent really and actually he only mentioned it yesterday when there was a big party going on and hasn't mentioned it at all today, I don't really know why I included it.

Most of you seem to think IABU so I won't ask her directly. I don't know them too well as they only moved in about 6 months ago but I have bumped into the woman and her DS at local park and chatted and she seemed really nice. If the opportunity arises I might drop it into conversation if I can do it tactfully.

To those of you who think I'm selfish to want to enjoy a nice garden, I think a garden with little nooks and crannies is perfect for children playing in an imaginative way, I always loved my grandparents garden for this. I'm not a big fan of trampolines and there are plenty of other ways for children to play in a garden.

Oh and the bloke "checking me out" it was more of a double-take really but not what you want in your own back garden.

I think you are bring cheeky, all our gardens have trampolines and yes they are a bit of a nuicence but that's life.

Erect some trellising to screen you.

Your second point is ridiculous. Either tell your child no means no or sacrifice your cottage garden and get one yourself.

New girl you're not a fan of tramps are you? Were you denied one as a child or worried your pelvic floor would let you down if you had a shot?

I feel for you wanting to keep your cottage garden actually - if it's anything like my MIL's traditional garden, it may have taken years of work to establish... it's not something you can dig up & just put back in five years later when the DC are too grown up to want to play in the garden.

OTOH if you can make friends with your new neighbour you might end up with the best of both worlds - your Ds can go & play on their trampoline, and maybe they can come over to play in your garden.

(I know that's a bit of a rose-tinted view, depends very much on the people involved. Sometimes 'tis fine to chat at the park but not move onto "popping round on a whim" especially if they live right next door. Or is that just me )

YABU to ask and the 2nd reason why you want to is just plain silly. It's your job to say no if you don't want your child to have something (and deal with the subsequent whinging effectively!) not others' jobs to hide what they have out of sight.

But.

But, reason number one. Now that could be a way of getting what you want.

"(yesterday I found myself being checked out by a bloke while I breastfed DD!)"

Tomorrow morning, have a quiet word with Mrs Neighbour and tell her that her husband was checking you out while you breastfed DD.

I guarantee the trampoline will be moved by lunchtime!

Oh yeah, and bollocks to the theory that you're selfish for wanting a nice garden and not a playground on your back lawn.

I think YABVU and it would be cheeky to ask.

Why do you feel yours and your family's enjoyment of your garden trumps your neighbour's family's enjoyment?

I agree about nooks and crannies to play in my DDs manage to find them in a big open garden that doesn't really have many.

However, you will end up with a trampoline, its the law!

(I don't think your being UR to be annoyed next door have put theirs on a raise area where it is especially intrusive, I know our easy set pool is nearer next door than I would like, but its insanely fussy about being level and our huge trampoline has the other flat spot already)

pop in a couple of leylandii

it is really selfish to create an overlooking issue like this - if everyone was more considerate then the world would be a better place - they want there they should provide screening to protect your privacy or move it.

in the meantime set up a video camera and make money from you've been framed? These tramps are ybf fodder

Yabu. Their garden. If you object so much get a higher fence. And part of parenting is having to put up with you dc moaning if kids have something they haven't. Plus, can't you just put your cottage picture perfect garden on hold while you have children living at home and make it a nice place for them to play? I would rather have a trampoline that my child can play on and get exercise than a child stuck indoors because they might mess up my garden.

Doesn't a window in their house overlook your garden anyway surely?

you would hate me once i moved in me and dh put this number together.

www.climbingframeinstaller.co.uk/2011/04/costco-rainbow-wooden-playset/

i have many years to enjoy a lovely garden with plants and flowers but only have my DC as children for a short time.

if you asked me to move it i would say no

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos

"If moving it would limit them in some way then it's unfair to ask them to be inconvenienced in their garden so that you aren't inconvenienced in yours."

WTF!!

Of coarse the people who want the trampoline should be inconvienced by it.
its their bloody trampoline.

YABU to write this "yesterday I found myself being checked out by a bloke while I breastfed DD!" And then confirm "Oh and the bloke "checking me out" it was more of a double-take really"

I used to bf wherever and whenever, never had any looks, many friends who had children later asked "I'm nervous of doing it, what if someone sees/says something/stares." "Checking you out" implied it was a sexually motivated look. No wonder some women are hesitant of bf in public with bollocks like that being bandied about.

Get a trampoline, don't get one, that's your choice and yours to deal with regardless of what your neighbours have. YABU to ask them to move it.

YABU

Just say no to your son and I doubt much checking out can be done when someone is bouncing out of view every other jump. And why feed facing the fence if your garden is go lovely?

We had someone we had barely spoken too as us to trim down a beautifully flowering but tall bush as it blocked the sun going into their garden. We did it for the sake of neighbourhood relations but dh said no the following year and was rather pissed off. A beautiful tree trumps her getting sun light in my book.

YABU

I wouldn't be offended if our neighbour asked this. So I think YWNBU to ask. But I also wouldn't feel obliged to move it because you'd asked. I'd consider the request and see if we could accommodate without infringing on our enjoyment of our own garden too much. I think there is little it is unreasonable to ask for, but equally little it is reasonable to expect.

Point 2 is, of course, U, but I sympathize with the sentiment.

YABU - it's their garden FFS! OK, I may be a bit biased as we have a trampoline in our garden BUT it's sort of irrelevant as we are overlooked from both sides by their upstairs windows.

TBH I believe in live and let live - life's too short.

Of coarse the people who want the trampoline should be inconvienced by it
its their bloody trampoline

And it's also their bloody garden

Why should they be any more inconvienced by it than their neighbours?

This is a trampoline we're talking about...something for the kids to play on when they feel like it.

It's not like they've planted a row of Leylandii

I'd ask at least, in the nicest possible way, if it would make any difference to them if they moved it. But I'd then have to accept it if they said no, because it is, after all, their garden.

My neighbour in the UK put up a trampoline at the bottom of her garden for her 3 boys - they could of course then see straight over my fence whenever - I went round to speak to her about it and I could see she was going into slight defensive mode, but then relaxed when I explained that I would really prefer it if she's put a safety net around it! She hadn't wanted to do that in case it was too much of an eyesore for me (bless her) - I told her I'd far rather see the net than have one of her boys injured.

Just ask - the worst they can do, if you ask nicely, is say no.