To think that having the odd glass of wine shouldn't get you chucked off the JSA?

[Hullygully]

Another cunning ruse. Alcohol testing to see if you can have your half a goat a week.

If you don't smoke or drink you don't qualify for the goat, sorry.

Perhaps you could start?

Or just have a bath in special brew??

No rehab, no goat.

I saw a goat wandering around in the middle of a busy roundabout the other day. He has jumped out of the back of a Nissan truck on the way to the slaughterhouse. That's a true story that is.

If I drank less I might be allowed to keep him. I'd rather have the gin than the goat, if I'm honest.

Oh wait. I have to have a drink problem to my goat? Now that I can cope with

Hmmm. I'm not so sure the goats exist.

Maybe they just subliminally plant the idea you have a goat while you are sat in the job centre. That why you need to drink to qualify.

It'll be pink elephants next you mark my words!

KatieScarlett, packing tape ought to do it.

LineRunner free nipple-wax too!

What if you give the goat the wine????

The worst meal I ever had was in Africa where they cooked goat stew which I could just about cope with. Then they passed round a plate of goat intestine which was kind of hairy. OMG!

If you can afford to give the goat wine then you can't claim JSA. The goat goes back, i'm afraid...

I like goat to eat. I had it once outside one of those hippy teepees in Wales roasted on a spit THE GOAT when I was young and it's all a bit of a haze to be honest.

Every time I go to Camden I have to get some goat curry from teh market.