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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have found this headline...questionable?

33 replies

MissM · 22/05/2012 09:28

Saw the cover of one of those 'Take a rest'/'Have a cup of tea'/'Sit down with a nice crossword'-type magazines yesterday. It said 'I married my rapist'. Perhaps I'm being over-sensitive, and I'm sure it's a very heart-warming story Hmm, but AIBU to have found it a bit - well - of questionable taste? I can't really put my finger on it, but it's really been bothering me.

OP posts:
MrsHelsBels74 · 22/05/2012 09:33

It's probably an inflammatory headline designed to get people to buy the magazine & I doubt has little bearing on the story in reality. I read one once 'dad begged me to have his baby' was the headline when in actual fact that was 1 sentence of the whole 2 page story. I'm not saying it's right but you might find the whole story is totally different to what you expect.

lollilou · 22/05/2012 09:33

It won't be a heartwarming story they never are. Those titles are getting worse and the stories are horrible. I sometimes get magazines from charity shops and one yesterday had the title "My 7 year old son was raped by a 10 year old boy" wtf.

Original poster
MissM · 22/05/2012 09:36

It may well be a sensational headline, but I suppose I'm wondering why it's necessary. If I had been raped, I think I would find it incredibly traumatic to have that screaming at me in the local petrol station. Why is it necessary (other than to sell the magazine, obviously, which it didn't to me)? Do people really want to read about someone who has been raped and then fallen in love (apparently) with their attacker? Even typing the words makes me feel a bit sick.

OP posts:
Nancy66 · 22/05/2012 09:40

Yes people do.

Original poster
MissM · 22/05/2012 09:43

I suppose I know that Nancy - the question was more rhetorical. Although do they really, or is it something they have come to want to read because the media provides it? The old chicken and egg thing really.

OP posts:
Nancy66 · 22/05/2012 09:46

The 'chav mag' (as they are known in the industry) market is one is not suffering nearly as much as the glossy one. Cover price will have something to do with this but, equally, the theory is that people who have crap lives need to know that there is someone out there with a crapper life than theirs.

TheHouseOnTheCorner · 22/05/2012 09:50

The worst of it is that the "journalists" who write this filth, are like preying wolves when they speak to their victims (often ignorant and unaware of how their stories will be twisted) and they pay peanuts too.

entropygirl · 22/05/2012 09:58

urghh that is awful.

HMTheQueen · 22/05/2012 10:00

I concur The House. I was one of those vicitms.

After my DH died (even before we'd had the funeral!) I had a 'journalist' on my doorstep wanting me to sign a contract to sell my story. I stupidly did, and then regretted it. She threatened to sell the story to the newspapers - I would get no money, and no control over what was printed.

Thankfully my FIL is a lawyer and managed to get her on the phone, recorded the conversation and got her to admit to harrassing me. He then threatened persuaded her not to go ahead, and reported her to the Press Complaints Commission.

My story was still published - but I got 4 times the money I was originally offered - which went into a trust for my DS who was only 7 months old when DH died.

The story itself is actually quite funny when I read it - it sounds nothing like me! Grin

MrsHelsBels74 · 22/05/2012 10:03

It's not questionable taste, it's bad taste but do you think the people who are running these magazines consider anything other than profits? I very much doubt the welfare of these people who sell their stories enters into it.

TroublesomeEx · 22/05/2012 10:09

If people didn't buy them, they wouldn't make them.

It's as simple as that.

Nancy66 · 22/05/2012 10:10

A large number of the people featured in magazines like: Real People, Pick Me Up, Love It etc go direct to the magazine.

Of course the magazines are thinking of profit but you'd be amazed at the number of people who want to appear

TroublesomeEx · 22/05/2012 10:15

Well I suppose it's like going on Jeremy Kyle but you get paid for it.

nyprincess · 22/05/2012 10:16

I have to admit that I bought that mag, like to read it in the bath.

The story was pretty much what the headline said. It wasn't right after but she did marry the guy who raped her, I think it was a co-worker.

startail · 22/05/2012 10:17

I always take my own book to my hairdresser, those are the only mags she has and I hate them.

TroublesomeEx · 22/05/2012 10:17

Classy Hmm

TroublesomeEx · 22/05/2012 10:17

(The woman who married her rapist, not you for reading it in the bath Blush)

TeWiDoesTheHulaInHawaii · 22/05/2012 10:21

Were they happy together? If I saw that headline I would assume they were forced to marry not that she chose to Confused

lazarusb · 22/05/2012 10:25

What really concerns is how it could minimise the experience of rape in some people's eyes. The 'It can't have been that bad, one woman married her rapist' type brigade. The ones that will find any excuse to add to the rape myths that women secretly enjoy being violated. It surely isn't in anyone's interest to print this stuff?

Freddiebump · 22/05/2012 11:02

I read this as it was on the table at work, and it actually is a story about a woman who got raped by a drunken "friend" and then went on to get to know him, fall in love and get married. Didn't get it and I think he must have a small screw loose somewhere! Where do they find these people???

Nancy66 · 22/05/2012 11:10

it's proably made up

Original poster
MissM · 22/05/2012 11:11

lazarusb I suppose that's why it feels so uncomfortable to me. There's also the rape within marriage issue - that somehow it's 'ok' that he raped her, cos now they're married. Just as it's 'not rape' if a man forces his wife to have sex.

Freddiebump - my thoughts exactly! Where do they find these people?!

OP posts:
nyprincess · 22/05/2012 11:14

Thought you meant me too Folkgirl.lol

The woman said she was happy, awhile after the rape she met him through another co-worker and ended up falling for him, they don't talk about the past.

Original poster
MissM · 22/05/2012 11:22

'They don't talk about the past'. Well that makes it all alright then!

OP posts:
Fireandashes · 22/05/2012 11:26

That will be an interesting conversation if they have DCs.

"So mummy, how did you first meet daddy...?"

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