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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

or should I boot "D"H in the nuts?

26 replies

toofattorun · 19/05/2012 15:42

H: Where's the extension lead? (He is about to mow the lawn).
Me: It's either in the cupboard under the stairs or in the garage.
H: I have looked in both places and it's not there.
Me: Well it can't be anywhere else.
H: Are you sure?
Me: I know how you "look"for things. If it's not right in front of your nose you can't see it. Just look for it under the stairs or in the garage.

After a while...

Me: Did you find the extension lead?
H: Yes, but it wasn't where you said it was. It was hidden in the garage.

ARGHHHHH!!!

When he means "hidden", it means it actually took more than 5 seconds to find it. Our garage is 90% empty! The lazy bugger.

OP posts:
Debeez · 19/05/2012 15:45

Deep breath.

Have Wine It's technically late afternoon.

DP has just suggested your DP is "Protecting his manhood" by claiming it was hidden. This is how they think ffs, be glad he hasn't mown his toes off (DP added "yet") and congratulate yourself on finding a man who actually went and looked again rather than making you do it :o

< I am being tongue in cheek, men are perfectly capable beings and have the same worth as women>

MaureenMLove · 19/05/2012 15:46

God love 'em!

DH has just returned from the shops with some mayo, because we haven't got any. I presented him with the mayo we haven't got, when he walked back through the door! Arse Grin

Original poster
toofattorun · 19/05/2012 15:47
Grin
OP posts:
diddl · 19/05/2012 15:51

"Yes, but it wasn't where you said it was. It was hidden in the garage."

Grin

So-it was where you said it was-it was in the garage-just not immediately in view!

Who used it last & put it away?

Booboostoo · 19/05/2012 16:03
Grin

DP is exactly the same! Sometimes after I have said "It's in X" and he can't find it, I go with him to X, shut my eyes, extend my arm and get the 'hidden' item...but only when I want to show off! Grin

CailinDana · 19/05/2012 16:10

Today, I hear DH rummaging in the fridge.
DH : Where are the carrots? (bear in mind, we have only ever stored carrots in one place, ever)
Me: Confused In the salad drawer in the fridge (can't get more specific than that, surely?)
DH: Really?
Me: Yeees
DH opens the fridge and looks, blank faced, in the door. Why there would be carrots in the door of the fridge I will never know.
Me: (speaking slowly) DH, in the salad drawer.

DH:
Me: (pointing) The.Salad.Drawer, the salad drawer!
DH: (finally engaging brain). Oh!

Sigh.

helenthemadex · 19/05/2012 16:45

sometimes its good to be single rather than have to deal with an overgrown child dh or dp

trikken · 19/05/2012 16:52

The 'man-looking' is annoying. even my six yr old ds has begun this. they cant see it even if right in front of them but I refuse to get everything out for them. Im mean.

Sparklingbrook · 19/05/2012 16:59

DH asked me this morning why the Sat Nav wouldn't turn on. How would I know? Confused Then lots of huffing and rooting through the draw of various leads. The lead couldn't be found. Now it is found but the Tom Tom still won't switch on.

(By the way if anyone does know that would be great. It's a TomTom One)

nickelbabe · 19/05/2012 17:08

when you say the lead is found, has it been plugged in (at both ends), the socket turned on?
if so, dunno.
it has to charge to switch on - dn't know if fully-charged first.

Sparklingbrook · 19/05/2012 17:09

Thanks nickel. I have pressed the on/off button for ages and it now seems to be alive and have plugged it into the computer. Looking hopeful. Smile

diddl · 19/05/2012 17:59

It´s a ploy to get us to do it, I think.

My reply is often "no idea"Blush

WhereYouLeftIt · 19/05/2012 19:00

And this is the reason behind my name. Although it is DS-related rather than DH (to be fair he never man-looks).

captainmummy · 19/05/2012 19:12

Am trying to teach ds2 to cook.

ds2 - where are the onions (lloking in fridge)
me - in the middle cupboard, bottom drawer
ds2 - huh?(looking in salad drawer in fridge
me - in the middle CUPBOARD, BOTTOM DRAWER
ds2 - pulling out drawers of fridge, moving mayo etc
me - IN THE MIDDLE CUPBOARD, BOTTOM DRAWER. NOT THE FRIDGE!
ds2 - huh?

Ad infinitum

captainmummy · 19/05/2012 19:14

:Point is - one day he will be a DH. He needs to learn early!

Softlysoftly · 19/05/2012 19:18

I tend to find "do you really really want me to stand up and look?" motivates some actual looking

Sparklingbrook · 19/05/2012 19:19

The major panic in this house is when the TV remote goes missing (daily event). proper looking is done then, oh yes. No rest until it is found. Angry

No point asking me, I NEVER have it.

TheArmadillo · 19/05/2012 19:19

Dh gets annoyed if I can't tell him the exact position of something off the top of my head. For example we have lots of furniture with drawers in. I have to be able to tell him which exact drawer it is in and whereabouts in the drawer it is. Woebetide me getting it wrong Hmm

Usually it wasn't even me who put it away Confused

Ds does the same and dh can't see why I get cross with him. Apparently an item being 3 inches to the left of where I said it was obviously leaves it unfindable and I shouldn't expect them to y'know look around. Even when I have given a full description of the object in question. We had a row about this once (and we never row normally).

Angry

Its a good that I have a very good memory for where things are.

faulkernegger · 19/05/2012 20:08

Surely the only answer to " Where is the.....?" is " I don't know sweetie." Works for me.

DieDeutschLehrerin · 19/05/2012 20:35

Ah faulkernegger - I try that but my DH is very persistent. Conversations usually go the way of:
DH: Do you know where my phone is?
Me: No idea, sorry.
DH: is it in the kitchen, do you know?
Me: I don't know, sorry.
DH: It's not on the stairs is it?
Me: I DON'T KNOW! I didn't know first time and I still don't know now. Lots of questions do not prompt sudden revelations!
DH: (looking hurt) Alright. Only asking, ref.
And why 'ref' I will never understand.

Original poster
toofattorun · 19/05/2012 20:46

I love the term "man-looking". How should I use it when talking to my DH? Something like:
H: where's the extension lead?
Me: In the garage.
H: I've looked in there and it's not in there.
Me: Were you "man-looking" for it?
H:Yes.

Me: There you go darling, glad to be of assistance to you.

OP posts:
AdoraBell · 19/05/2012 22:19

My OH does similar, at least he would if I would give him and answer like your's.

My stock answer is -whever you put it-and when it gets to the -No, It's Not- stage I usually say Well, I can see it from here, or my favourite for something that is mere millimetres from his hand I claim to have no clue what he's referring to or wher it may be found. That one is the most fun

poocatcherchampion · 19/05/2012 22:23

At some point in these conversations chez nous I say "do I have to come and find it?" In a menacing voice, and the offending item is almost always found immediately. Climate of fear here.

OAM2009 · 19/05/2012 22:28

I am so stupid Blush

I have always been so proud of my ability to find the things my DH has looked for and not found.

Joolyjoolyjoo · 19/05/2012 22:35

Oh yes, both my dad and my DH do this- its infuriating!

Years ago, DH (then DP) and I had a major row about it. We were going out to dinner and he asked where his shoes were. I said if I put them away they would be in the cupboard upstairs. He (apparently) looked there and they were. not. there. I shrugged and said if they weren't there, I had no idea (knowing full well they would be there!) He looked at me incredulously and said "Aren't you going to even look for them?" Erm, no! First, they are your shoes, and there is only one place I would have put them. And you say they are not there. "yeah, but you haven't looked..." Are you saying they are where I said they were, but you are incapable of looking? No, i'm not looking!

Went out to dinner, him in his trainers, not speaking. When we got home, I marched upstairs, opened cupboard, found shoes (then threw them at him) He has been a bit better since Hmm