AIBU? Am I overreacting? Cheryl Cole interview on radio (possible rant)

[FeedingTheBirds]

Am not a prolific poster but just heard this interview with her on local radio and it is eating away at me.

Local radio station but I think they have many other "local" radio stations around the country, her interview can apparently be heard at www.indemand.fm. Don't know how to link - sorry.

She was discussing an upcoming possible duet with Rhianna and they got onto the subject of Chris Brown. Cheryl said that because Rhianna had publicly (sp?) forgiven Chris B that the rest of "us" should also. She went onto say that him being in the public eye made it harder for him and that through "her charity" she had met lots of reformed characters who had done "bad things and been in prison" and they were now upstanding members of the community.

I can't help thinking quite ferociously that she has said something quite silly. I know that 10 years ago when I was plucking up the courage to leave violent ex husband that hearing something like that might have made me think, hang on maybe he CAN reform and be a lovely pillar of the community and stayed and suffered for it. At that time I wouldn't have thought to myself I wonder how many violent men actually DO change their ways. I still do not know the statistics but I am betting it is fairly low.

Am I overthinking this? I am more than tempted to write to the radio station or in fact the company who own the various radio stations because I think she has said something stupid and potentially dangerous for many many vulnerable women. (Not sure what response I would expect if I even did contact them). Very unsure and as I have said, possibly overthinking.

She is a silly, vacuous cow with nothing between the ears and her 'singing' is utter rubbish.

She's an affront to feminism.

She is as thick as mince, or at least comes across that way. Remember she also has a conviction for violently attacking a toilet attendent....so maybe she feels she can't exactly criticise someone who has been violent themselves.

I think that she is entitled to her opinion and if that?s what she thinks then it's up to her.

And also in your paragraph you forgot to add about the many vulnerable men as well as the women you mentioned.

She was probably feeling sorry for herself about the fact that the press often bring up her own colourful violent encounter.

Meant to add, yes you're right - its a poor message to be sending out to girls/women.

I don't actually agree with what she said though.

- i agree. I am aware though that, as many many women on MN (and of course other places!), I am oversensitive and not sure if I am jabbering on about my OWN stuff when in fact she was just jabbering on about unknown 'slebs.

Too many commas and all in wrong places I know.

Yes, vulnerable men too of course, but this is not what she was talking about.

I agree there is probably a certain amount of self-interest behind that statement.

I wince every time she opens her mouth and I am reminded that she comes from the same town as my family.

I think you are over thinking it personally.

While celebrities do have to be careful what they say, they are not experts on anything they are talking about, and they don't pretend to be. They are interviewed because people want to hear their opinions, and that is all they are.

Anyone who wants to take the opinion of Cheryl Cole as sound advice that they should live by has to take some responsibility for any consequences.

Similar to Natalie Cassidy.

So many people up this way treat her as some kind of 'Lady Di' figure and it grips my piss.

Hadn't even thought about the angle of her own "past".

I am probably overthinking it as I suspected.

No, feeding, you're right. She's a complete idiot for making that her public position on domestic abuse.

Nice hair though, right?

If you think about it she went back with Ashleigh, to me she sounds like it in her personality to be forgiving

I think you are right. Cole is sending out a stupid and very dangerous message. I think it would be great if you contacted the radio station and tell them what you said in your OP, about the effect this statement would have had on you when you were being attacked. Maybe it will make the producer THINK about the effect of promoting such nonsense. I'm a journalist - not radio, though - btw and if I had a letter or email from a reader explaining we'd inadvertently put victims of DV in danger, I'd be appalled. Ask if they can run an apology or clarification, or get someone from Refuge or Women's Aid or End Violence Against Women in. (Sorry, I don't know the station, so no idea how likely this is.)

Yes outraged you are probably more than accurate, I AM being too personal. I never post about things but this one just really got my goat.

TBF I felt the same when Natalie Cassidy said what she said. I personally don't look up to or aspire to be like any 'sleb but some people are that vulnerable and easily led and they aren't all childless naive teens.

Outraged - sadly some people will be influenced by Cheryl. That's why advertisers and sponsors pay big money for celeb endorsements.

A total brain donor. With a conviction for assault.

A 'career' built on looking like a poor attempt at a barbie doll.

Yes, her philandering husband has certainly demonstrated a pious devotion to changing his ways

Please God my dd does not in the future look to this sort of gormless sow as a role model.

I think I will take a bit of time tonight to get my own outrage in order and then write an email.

It often drives me MAD when radio djs refer to Chris Brown as the "bad boy" of R&B. Yeah what a bad boy. No he isn't a bad boy who rides a motorbike and wears leather and rocks out of nightclubs drunk, he's a "man" who battered a woman. What a bad boy. .

Manicbcm - spot on

She's a moron. Always has been, probably always will be. Anyway she can't have a go at Chris Brown really as she too assaulted a woman. She is thug with a pretty face.

I think she was in a bit of a tough spot tbh. If she's friends with Rihanna/planning to work with her then she is kind of forced to 'toe the party line'. I've heard women who have suffered domestic violence say that a friend slagging off the violent partner doesn't do any good, all that happens is they fall out with the friend.

She was probably caught off guard, I don't think she's ever claimed to know anything about domestic violence and she's not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

I don't think we should condemn her for it.

I also don't think anyone should make life desicions on the basis of what Chezza says in a radio interview.

HolyCamera - I agree that people shouldn't make decisions based on celebrity twaddle but some people DO listen to it and DO make choices to stay and "fight for their love". I can honestly say that 10 years ago it would have made me pause and think.

Makes me a pathetic person I suppose but back then, I would have thought it. Others will too.