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Original poster

by not worrying (until now) about DS walking?

95 replies

FeakAndWeeble · 17/05/2012 13:59

DS is 14mo and is toddling about holding the furniture or our hands but has yet to walk independently. We're in no rush, he's perfectly healthy and happy, we're just helping him whenever he indicates he'd like to go for a wander.

Earlier I was putting him in the car outside my dad's house when a neighbour I don't know approached and asked his age, then whether or not he's walking. When I said he was toddling but not properly walking yet she said to DS 'Well you're a very lazy boy then, and mummy needs to stop carrying you!' and walked off.

I was a bit Confused and just got in the car and drove off - but it played on me all the way home and now I've got myself all worked up that I'm doing something wrong/DS isn't developing as he should.

Is she right? Or do children - as I'd thought - just do things at different times and when they're ready? He chatters nineteen to the dozen and has lots of words. My friend's DS is of a similar age and has been walking since he was one but never says a word. Children are just different.... Right?!

OP posts:
treas · 17/05/2012 14:24

Children walk when they want to.

My ds started at 9 m.o. and though as my pfb I was beyond proud it didn't take long to realise what a nightmare it was when I was unable to leave him alone for a second or when I had to visit A and E to get a butterfly stitch on his eyebrow after a fall.

My friends dd didn't walk until she was 18 m.o. - they had parquet flooring and it was slippery, so she didn't feel safe. When she did walk she was more stable than my ds.

They are both now 11 y.o. and guess what - you can't tell who walked firstGrin

Everyone these days seems to feel that their opinions need to be expressed - wrong - don't give a stuff about any comments from others.

HexagonalQueenOfTheSummer · 17/05/2012 14:25

A good thing to say to people like that is 'Well thank you for your parenting wisdom'. Usually shuts them up

WheresMyCow · 17/05/2012 14:25

Don't worry about it and ignore your neighbour.

My DS was nearly 16 months before he walked. He kept on getting compared to 2 other babies in the family (1 who is 2 weeks older and the other who is 5 days older) because they were both walking and I just said that he would walk when he was ready.

As it happens, they both now get compared to him as his vocabulary is so much better that theirs Smile

Popoozle · 17/05/2012 14:28

DS1 was 16 months, DS2 was 12 months and DD has just started walking at 9 months.

All babies are different, no need to worry - he'll do it when he's good and ready Grin.

tethersend · 17/05/2012 14:28
ilovedjasondonovan · 17/05/2012 14:29

My DDs were 17 months and 15 month walkers.

Apparently I didn't walk until I was gone 2 - and that apparently was because of lazyness. My mum ran a nursery and I just used to sit there watching all the other children with the children bringing me stuff to play with.

Hullygully · 17/05/2012 14:29

TOMORROW??

Whoo hoo!

Planned cs?

BeaWheesht · 17/05/2012 14:31

14m is still young, none of my nieces or nephews walked until 14-16m.

Kids all do things at different paces, ds is now 5 and Ive known some of the kdis at his schoool since they were babies - some walked at 9 months, some at 19 months - you cant tell now which one was which as they tear around the playground like mad things! I remind myself of this often when Im worrying that dd (20m) doesnt talk very much yet!

BrainSurgeon · 17/05/2012 14:32

Good on you OP, listen to MN it's the source of all wisdom" Wink

Good luck tomorrow tethers!!!

sugarice · 17/05/2012 14:34

*Treas, my ds2 walked at 9 months as well and it was an absolute nightmare, he didn't even crawl first, just got up and walked, we couldn't take our eyes off him. A fairly old and very well read teacher friend told me at the time that as he didn't crawl he wouldn't read well later, I was mortified but it was utter crap of course.

tethersend · 17/05/2012 14:45

Planned cs indeed.

Am far too lazy for anything else.

Cheers Hully and BS Smile

Hullygully · 17/05/2012 14:46

v civilised, tethers.

Hullygully · 17/05/2012 14:46

I started you a thread...

FioFio · 17/05/2012 14:50

people are obsessed with

rolling
sitting
crawling
walking
potty training
talking
writing
reading
schooling

etc

you need to just ignore them

blueballoon79 · 17/05/2012 14:55

My DS is diabled and when he was 4 years old I was pushing him in his wheelchair (which I admit did look a little like a pushchair) when a woman told me I should be making him walk and that he'd end up lazy!

I explained to her that he was disabled and couldn't walk and she mumbled an apology, red faced and wandered off.

I think people should just keep their comments to themselves!

My DD didn't start walking until 22 months old and she's a brilliant walker now and can walk HUGE distances at only 3 years old. I wouldn't worry!

spartafc · 17/05/2012 14:56

My DS didn't walk on his own till 16 months.
My FIL made some daft comment when DS was about 14 months, something about him needing to start walking soon. I said that I'd often thought the same about FIL, who can be a bit lazy.
I can't see that it's made any difference to DS's life that he didn't walk till then. He's pretty much non-stop now.

Moominsarescary · 17/05/2012 14:57

My ds is 14 months and not walking I'm not worried at all. He will let go and walk when he's ready.

FioFio · 17/05/2012 14:58

blue ballon, i used to get the same when my dd had a major buggy and fgs you can TELL it's not a normal pushchair

Mishy1234 · 17/05/2012 15:01

Your neighbour is an idiot and very rude.

14 months is WELL within the window for walking. Try to ignore, but if she continues with the comments I would be rude back. It's the only thing which stops these people (and sometimes even that doesn't work!).

blueballoon79 · 17/05/2012 15:02

FioFio I'm glad I'm not alone there! I used to just brush it off but one time we were visiting Edinburgh Castle and we went to see the Crown Jewels. A staff member took us up a lift then walked us along to see them and a man loudly said "bloody stupid woman with your lazy child, taking up all the sapce with your pushchair, you should make him get out and walk!"

I said "Excuse me but I'd love to be able to make my son get out and walk, unfortunately though he's disabled so this isn't an option"

The man was so embarrassed but although I'd put him in his place I was so upset afterwards and cried once I got outside! I was only 23 years old at the time and struggling as it was on my own.

CupsofTeaAndHandfulsOfCake · 17/05/2012 15:08

My 3 girls could walk at 9 months and they could all do other things early too like potty training in the day, feeding themselves, that was easy and they did it early.

Some things they did really late - like being dry at night, tying shoelaces, catching a ball.
My son could walk at 12 months and didn't speak a single word until he was 2 years and a few months.
My point is they are all different, even siblings!
Don't worry about what some silly, nosey lady said.

Snowboarder · 17/05/2012 15:09

Ooh, this is a real bugbear of mine.

My DS1 is a big strapping lad at 14 mo and looks his age BUT he was born 3 months prematurely and had a rough start. He is 11 months corrected and that is how he should be 'judged' developmentally. Because of horrendous reflux he has always hated being on his stomach so is only just crawling (started yesterday!) but he has been trying to walk (standing up unsupported, cruising proficiently, pulling up) for a while now.

I get all manner of unsolicited comments from people (friends included) who can't get their heads around the fact that he's actually 11 months developmentally - he's very late for crawling/ he's going to be an 'early' walker/ he was late sitting up/ he shouldn't be eating solids yet/ he's not got as many teeth as they'd expect for his age. The worst was when one 'friend' said he should be sitting up by 5 months as he'd had 'extra' time in the world to practice - he was 2 months old corrected at this point!

I just try and smile and nod, all the while I'm thinking FFS he's lucky to be alive and I'm bloody proud of each and every one of his milestones whenever and however he reaches them. It's all you can do really and I'd hate to offend anyone so I never say anything.

FioFio · 17/05/2012 15:09

I was a young mum too blueballoon (I was 21yo when i had her) and I used to find it upsetting

Ghoulwithadragontattoo · 17/05/2012 15:17

My DD walked at 15 months and my DS at 18 months. There's nothing wrong with them they were just taking their time. Our health visitor said to bring DS in if he wasn't walking at 18 months and they'd check whether there might be a physical reason for it but he just started walking just before I took him to see her :)

For what it's worth they were both very good talkers as babies / toddlers. I think there might be some truth in the idea that some children focus on one area first and the other but the vast majority can do both in the end!

Fuzzywood · 17/05/2012 15:17

Ignore ignore and yes ignore! DS (2nd DC) took his first very tottering steps just after 14 months and 6 weeks later is just about running. The first few weeks after walking he was very wobbly. He only says about 3 words though. They're all different, plus when they're walking they're even more trouble, enjoy it while you can Grin
I'm sure 14/15 months was the average for walking anyway.

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