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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think bring a bottle ... means bring what you plan to drink?

93 replies

Newmummytobe79 · 15/05/2012 17:23

I always take what I think I'll drink to a party - often a bit more just in case.

Went to a party recently and some guests brought four beers ... then drank the hosts spirits like they were going out of fashion. The hosts ran out of booze and felt bad even though I know they'd spent a fortune on a good selection of alcohol

Thinking about hosting a party later on in the year but worried the alcohol cost will make it too expensive ... thoughts please on 'bring a bottle' and it's true meaning

OP posts:

WorraLiberty · 15/05/2012 17:25

That's what it means to me...bring what you drink.

I'd stock up on mixers though because whilst it's common to bring a bottle of spirits, most people won't bring the lemonade/coke etc too.

cardibach · 15/05/2012 17:25

It's polite to bring roughly what you intend to drink, but there are alwys some arseholes annoying people who see it as a chance for a cheap piss up. I know who that is likely to be in my circle of friends - do you? If so, don't invite them to the party!

MsKittyFane · 15/05/2012 17:25

Would 'please bring your own drinks' do the trick?

Shutupanddrive · 15/05/2012 17:28

Say bring your own beer instead of bring a bottle?

NervousAt20 · 15/05/2012 17:29

To me it would mean bring what you will drink

OrmIrian · 15/05/2012 17:29

Yes, it would be very rude but extremely economical to bring a bottle of washing up liquid.

SugarBatty · 15/05/2012 17:29

I thought it meant bring a bottle and it all gets put together and everyone drinks what they like?

I'm planning a house warming soon and have said "Bring a dish or bottle. Bring either or neither!"

I'd hope people wouldn't just neck all the spirits!

NettoSuperstar · 15/05/2012 17:30

I'd bring what I roughly plan on drinking, and then the same again on top.

NettoSuperstar · 15/05/2012 17:31

Actually, last timer I went to a party like that, I took 12 cans, a bottle of wine and a bottle of vodka.
I drank 5 of the cans, and knew that's about all I'd drink!

Aribura · 15/05/2012 17:32

To me it means bring what you will drink and some for others as well.

WilsonFrickett · 15/05/2012 17:32

Definitely means bring what you drink, although agree with Worra no-one ever remembers mixers. We normally by a half doz bottles of wine and a crate of beer (for a big party, not if it's just me and a pal) so there's some in reserve, but tbh none of my friends really drink spirits.

That said, we are all such gimmers now I'd be quite happy if someone brought four beers and then tanned my spirits. It's all 'ooh can I just have some water' and 'better pace myself' and 'I worked out it's 1.3 bottles of wine per month that's the safe limit' round ours now...

JeanBodel · 15/05/2012 17:33

I would say it means 'bring the quantity you'll drink'.

Maybe it's just me and my friends, but we all tend to bring various bottles of alcohol, then drink whatever the room is drinking. I.e. if everyone else is drinking beer, but I brought wine, I would drink beer until that ran out. Then we'd all drink my wine.

Aribura · 15/05/2012 17:33

Bring your own beer, I mean. Bring your own BOTTLE is just asking for it.

fuckbucket · 15/05/2012 17:33

Same as Netto. DP and I's standard offering is four pack of good lager and a bottle of PG.

Ratbagcatbag · 15/05/2012 17:34

Bring what you drink, I do stock up on soft drinks for kids to be used as mixers

I one had a birthday BBQ for my DSS, invited a lot of street, all got him a card bar one couple who said as BBQ was Friday and hid birthday was Thursday they couldn't see the point of a card. They bought no drinks and then helped themselves to all the booze in my fridge. To make it worse as they left I asked if they'd had a good night, to be told, no it was pretty crap actually as the kids hadn't behaved amazingly enough I now forget to invite them.

The only other thing I do is if lots of people bring say white wine I just open one and work trough that before going onto the next one.

AMumInScotland · 15/05/2012 17:34

Bring the sort of amount and type that you will drink. But some people are just freeloaders.

But the party you were at must have had quite a lot of freeloaders, not just the 4-beers people to have had that much of an impact surely? So I don't think anyone should feel guilty about running out, if lots of their guests are gits.

Chelly71 · 15/05/2012 17:34

Bring what you like most and one for the host.... My bottle bringing mantra

MsKittyFane · 15/05/2012 17:34

Agree about providing mixers but ask guests to bring everything else.
(am I rude? :o )

happyhopefulmummy · 15/05/2012 17:35

I had a friend once tell me before one of my parties neuter her nor her bf would be drinking - but they'd bring skmething to contribute. He brought 2 beers which he drank in te first 15 mins. She brought a 1/4 bottle of rum. They both drank copious amounts of wine during the evening, at dinner, and then lots of spirits afterwards.

When she left, she took the rest of her rum with her. She's a good friend but she's a tight arse and it's becoming irritating inviting her to things.

If i saw "Bring a bottle" on an invite, I'd take
Whatever I was likely to drink as well as a bottle of wine for the hosts to say thanks.

Rilson · 15/05/2012 17:36

We usually bring what we will drink and a six pack.

Good point about the mixers.

Quenelle · 15/05/2012 17:36

Yes, bring what you intend to drink ie if I usually drink gin and tonic I'll take a bottle of gin and put it with what's there already. We usually take some beers as well as what we plan to drink.

I suppose you have to allow for some who will take the piss but if there are known abusers who you're not bothered about don't invite them. They might get the message when the invitations stop coming.

QuintessentialShadows · 15/05/2012 17:37

Oh yes, but the flip side is when you bring a nice bottle of wine (say in the £36 mark), and the host take one look, say "ooh nice" and put the bottle far far away, and pour me out a drink of bog standard Pinot Grigioe de Chateux Tesco.

Now, THAT pisses me off.

WhataTreat · 15/05/2012 17:38

I always use BYOB - bring your own bottle. Maybe more specific than bring a bottle?!

Callisto · 15/05/2012 17:43

Well with my circle of friends/family we all usually pitch up with a bottle of wine, and whoever is hosting makes sure there is enough to go round (we all like a drink or three). Having said that, none of us are spirits drinkers (unless you count Pimms) and if someone came to a party of mine with a four-pack and then drank my drinks cabinet dry they wouldn't get another invitation.

Having had a couple of bad experiences (though not to do with drinking me dry) I now only invite people I actually like, trust and want in my house. Fuck the politics, life is too short.

DartsAgain · 15/05/2012 18:03

One of my uncles was notorious for this though. He'd bring a bottle of cheap plonk, which my aunt would usually drink while uncle necked loads of Dad's whisky. My Dad got to hiding the expensive malts he sometimes received as gifts so that he actually got to drink some of it.

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