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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be scared of this woman and unsure what to do?

27 replies

BeNiceOrLeave · 14/05/2012 11:11

I am rarely scared of anything but I am feeling increasingly threatened by my mom's next door neighbour.

In the past week she has:

Accused my 2yo of throwing rocks over her 6ft fence.
Told me she 'saw the little bastard do it'.
Told my mom she 'couldn't give a fuck' about him and she would make sure he got said rocks back...
Smashed their satellite dish.
Hurled abuse at repair man.
Shoved my mother nearly to the floor.
Stuck fingers up at me and sister while driving.
Scrawled awful grafitti on my parents garden
wall.
Accused my dad of abusing my mom.

She has lived there 15 years and only got like this with my parents a couple of months ago. I think she is ill but what can i do about it? She has always been like this with neighbours on other side, getting the guy there arrested for after claiming he attacked her. She has also accused another neighbour of trying to poison her.

DS wants to go round to his grandparents but im freaked out. i can't leave him in the garden.

What can i do??

OP posts:
bruxeur · 14/05/2012 11:12

Erm.

Call the police?

Pseudo341 · 14/05/2012 11:12

Go to the police

StrandedBear · 14/05/2012 11:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ItsAPublicForumWhine · 14/05/2012 11:14

Police.

Make a written record of every incident and report it.

Build up a file.

CCTV?

sleepingflower · 14/05/2012 11:14

Definitely call the Police - she has already committed numerous offences!

fuzzypicklehead · 14/05/2012 11:14

Please tell me the police have been called about the vandalism and shoving your mother.

I'm not sure what else can be done (someone will) but in the mean time, I sure wouldn't be inclined to take your son over there to play. Can you bring your parents round to yours for a visit?

WorraLiberty · 14/05/2012 11:15

Well call the Police obviously

But you don't have to leave your 2yr old in the garden alone you know

Original poster
BeNiceOrLeave · 14/05/2012 11:15

We HAVE called the police.

They have recorded it.

OP posts:
fuzzypicklehead · 14/05/2012 11:15

Does your mum's neighbor own her home, or could you enlist support from the landlord, local authority, or HA?

sugarice · 14/05/2012 11:16

Go to the police and don't take your ds there if she's threatening his safety.

ItsAPublicForumWhine · 14/05/2012 11:16

YOU need to keep a record of everything that happens too. So you can quote specific incidents, times & dates in a court.

Original poster
BeNiceOrLeave · 14/05/2012 11:17

And i don't mean leave him in the garden alone. I mean let him in the garden at all.

OP posts:
NiceCupOfTeaAndASitDown · 14/05/2012 11:17

Call the police! She is being abusive, threatening and has damaged someone else's property. If you're not sure about dialling 999 then try the non-emergency number (I'm sure someone can advise what it is) for advice. In the meantime don't take your son there.

StrandedBear · 14/05/2012 11:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
BeNiceOrLeave · 14/05/2012 11:21

What do you do if you suspect someone is ill? Social services?

OP posts:
Original poster
BeNiceOrLeave · 14/05/2012 11:22

Sorry for drip feeding. They have been to her house but no caution.

OP posts:
GoPoldark · 14/05/2012 11:23

What have the police done about it? If nothing, get back onto them! She shoved your mother to the floor? Why is she not on an assault charge?

Go higher up in police if necessary, and yes, if she rents or is HA, start kicking up a fuss.

fuzzypicklehead · 14/05/2012 11:25

Yes, your local social services team will have a person who is "on duty" that you can speak to and raise your concerns. It's unlikely that they'll be able to do anything in the short term, if she isn't already under the care of the mental health team, but they will log your concerns.

If you know any of her relatives, you could raise the issue with them but the police are your best bet in the short term.

fuzzypicklehead · 14/05/2012 11:26

And I'd second the CCTV. Get a visual record of anything she does that you can use in court if necessary.

Original poster
BeNiceOrLeave · 14/05/2012 11:28

Her family are mostly estranged. One daughter goes round but is as bad.

I'll ring the police again.

OP posts:
QuickLookBusy · 14/05/2012 11:33

Could you get the other neighbours on board too, so the police realise it isn't just you and your Mum?

You have to make the police realise you want something to be done, you are frightened of this woman. If they take no action I would make a complaint.

porcamiseria · 14/05/2012 11:43

call police and start a diary

CrispyCod · 14/05/2012 11:50

Sounds like this woman has mental health issues. A similar thing happened to my friend, she had a neighbour like this.

Do you know if she owns or rents her house? If she rents it contact the council or housing association as it is their responsibility for tenants causing anti-social behaviour.

Also report it to the police and continue to log each event.

FaceForRadio · 14/05/2012 11:54

continue to report to police. could any other neighbours have any input to your case?

or move

how awful.

Original poster
BeNiceOrLeave · 14/05/2012 12:03

Thanks. They will be sending someone else out.

Going to try mental health services as well. I really do think she is ill and this can't solely be a matter for the police.

OP posts: