Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I hate my new house

70 replies

SophieLeGiraffe · 10/05/2012 17:11

Is that unreasonable?

We moved in yesterday. It is dark, dingy, grimy and feels like I'm in some holiday cottage which needs a good clean before you can really start the holiday. We already paid a lot for it but now we're in it's obvious I'm going to have to start throwing money at it to bring it to our standard. Daft things like sockets aren't in straight are driving me bananas. Big cracks where cupboards etc were that will need fixing. Almost every room and corridor needs to be painted. And none of my furniture fits where it was supposed to.

The house I left was immaculate, why have I spent more on a house that's less nice and more bother?

OP posts:
dinkystinkyandveryverybored · 10/05/2012 17:57

I had exactly tehssame reaction to our house when we bought it - I really loved our old flat we sold then moved into a dark dingy house that Bodge the builder built, infested with mice and slugs - oh I was gutted. However, 4 years down the line and one v expensive refurb laer, I love my house now... and we've got rid of the slugs. Just the furry buggers to go..

quoteunquote · 10/05/2012 17:57

snagging list/book,

every time you spot something that will have to be attended to how ever small or large, it goes onto list,

this will feel positive and help you feel the little steps forward, which will deliver you to your desired space,

summarise the lists as often as possible, an order of works will emerge , which if you attend to carefully will save you a lot of money,

snagging lists really help to bring clarity to a project,

the more comprehensives the snagging list, and ordered, the more efficient cost and speed of build.

try to avoid quick fixes, that will really annoy you when you then have to do them properly, if worth living with a house for a little bit to see which bits really need changing, and where the natural light moves throughout the year.

NickECave · 10/05/2012 19:05

Moved into our house seven years ago. It had been empty for a year and rented out previously so there was quite a lot of ingrained dirt. The bathroom was 30 years old with a piss-yellow suite, sauna style wood panelling and (i kid you not!) a cork floor and cork tiles around the toilet cistern and pipe work into which 30 years of urine had seeped. The living room floor was part original wood boards and part scaffolding planks and the wet earth smell from the foundations persisted for the eighteen months it took us to be able to afford to lay a new floor. It did eventually come to feel like home though.

Pinot · 10/05/2012 19:09

My house was, on paper, our dream house. And when we viewed it I knew straight away I was home.

On moving day I walked into a minging dusty pit.

But after tears (me) and elbow grease (me and DH), it is now as lush as it should always have been.

It's lovely, actually, waking a house up from a grimy sleep and bringing the love back in.

I kind of envy you!

3monkeys · 10/05/2012 19:10

When we moved in here, I cried! I'd been at work while DH got the keys. We spent the evening cleaning dog hair out of all the kitchem cupboards and then stayed the night at Mother in law's with DS1. I was pregnant at the time!
We sorted out the bathroom and got heating sorted, then once DD arrived we were all caught up in that and now Iadore it - 11 years later!

IvantaOuiOui · 10/05/2012 19:11

I am imagining Nick E reading your post aloud now. Or singing it.

albertswearengen · 10/05/2012 19:13

Our last 2 houses I've hated when we moved in- both head over heart things. I've learnt now in this new house to start straight away. Painting takes no time at all and is easier when there is nothing much in the room.
In our last house we did all the big things but put a lot of small things off as it seemed like a faff and I didn't love it enought to even want to sort it. When we did do the small bits and pieces just before we moved out I could've kicked myself it was so much better. I was there for 10 years.
Paint something this weekend it will make you feel better.

Flisspaps · 10/05/2012 19:16

Happy New House Grin

Wine will make it all much better Wink

BeeInMyBonnet · 10/05/2012 19:23

This puts me in mind of where Spike Milligan wants to get rid of his house. (Scroll to 1.32)Grin

Original poster
SophieLeGiraffe · 10/05/2012 20:56

Thanks, all I have been investing heavily in wine and chocolate. I find this has its' own pitfalls though - after the wine DH and friend shoved down me last night, I felt ok about it all...then I got up this morning!

Pinot if you want to come wake this house up, be my guest I'll be in the pub when you're done Grin

You are all (and that old thread) making me feel a lot better. At least I do not have cork bathroom tiles to contend with. I've got all the orange mould off the shower and brightened up everything with a bucket load of jiff. Also, I have a plan now - I want it all done so I can enjoy living here. We knew ceilings needed re-plastering so we had a plasterer lined up ready to start this weekend. He's now doing a bit more taken for a ride so most of the hard work will be done within a week. Then it'll be mist coats and final paint so in two weeks I should have a largely better decorated house.

I also contacted a random painter and got him to quote for the bathroom and kitchen as I can't bear to do those fiddly bits myself like fill in and sand cracks and paint round the fiddly bits. I'll be painting the nice straight simple walls thank you very much. At this rate I won't be able to afford wine Shock

And I need to sell some sofas on ebay or something and invest in the modular. How do second hand sofas sell? About 1/3 purchase cost?

Can I also just say, the NTL man came today to fix up my broadband/tivo/phones (I've no fridge yet but I've got awesome broadband) and left a whacking great hole in my wall which he's bodged up with silicone, then got me to fill in a satisfaction survey whilst he stood there asking me all the questions. There's no way I was going to say, "umm actually you seem a bit dim and you've ruined at least one wall and I'm pretty sure you over-complicated your cabling."

OP posts:
Xmasbaby11 · 10/05/2012 20:59

Don't despair - I know exactly how you feel. It makea a really big difference if you need to spend a lot time cleaning to get it up to scratch. You'll get there xxx

sleepchildsleep · 10/05/2012 21:03

I have just moved too. When you view someone where you are only there for a short period, we viewed this 3 times for a maximum of 15 mintues each time. The vendor will probably have made a big effort to make presentble, clean and smell nice shme they didn't do the same before moving.

Although we are happy with our new home, there is a terrible whiff of dogs and smoke that we hadn't noticed.Hmm

littlecrystal · 12/10/2013 02:01

I hated my house when I moved in 4 years ago. Today the feeling is the same despite of quite a few improvements that we did to the house. I lay awake at odd hour at night dreaming to be in another house which I would love. My house is now sold under offer. I am hoping to move soon. Dont torment yourself . It is better to move no matter how irrational the move could be. I regret that I have stayed in the house for so long. Sorry, the house..

veronatops · 08/01/2014 05:50

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

SaltySeaBird · 08/01/2014 06:42

I sat and cried my eyes out when I first let myself into our new house. It seemed so daunting and there was so much to do. It needed total renovation but we had to do 90% of the work ourselves as we had no budget (and no clue).

Now I love it, it's our home.

PrimalLass · 08/01/2014 06:48

If it is only paint and a bit of plastering, that's not too bad. Glad you feel more cheerful about it now.

3bunnies · 08/01/2014 06:57

I hope she is feeling more cheerful, she's been there almost two years now.

Nanny0gg · 08/01/2014 08:37

Grin @ 3bunnies

FortyDoorsToNowhere · 08/01/2014 08:49

When I moved into my house I couldn't even start decorating as the windows, kitchen and bathroom was being replaced and it needed new wiring and a boiler done ( that god I am renting) so for the first year I did nothing but clean the house.

4 years in and I have finally got the home I want.

Op it just takes time.

TheWitTank · 08/01/2014 09:51

Can you afford to hire some cleaners to give it a really deep clean -shampoo all the carpets, steam the bathroom etc? At least then you will be leaving in a ultra clean, fresh house which is much easier to face than a grotty, other people's filth one. Then list of priorities-what can you absolutely not stand the most? It will get there!

TheWitTank · 08/01/2014 09:52

I just realised this is ancient! I wonder if she is enjoying her house now?

Dawndonnaagain · 08/01/2014 09:54

THURSDAY MAY 10th. 2012.

You even get a little note asking if you really want to revive an old thread ffs.
Yes, I know, but I haven't had enough sleep for days.

Summerblaze · 08/01/2014 09:55

We bought our house 2 years ago. We knew that it needed some fixing up, new bathrooms, new bannister and some minor building work. However, as it was rented out for a time, it was neglected, dirty and certain things were ruined by their dog. I was pg with DS2 at the time and couldnt stand chemical smells so we moved in with my parents for a few months.

It was a much larger house and i was so excited to have bought it until we walked in and i thought 'what on earth have i done'. The estate agent who sold our old house said it was the best done out house he had on his books for years so to go from that to this was awful.

After 4 months and 6 weeks before DS2 was born i walked into my new house which DH and our parents had been decorating and i couldnt believe it. Complete transformation and is definitely home now.

Give yourself time to make it your own.

Summerblaze · 08/01/2014 09:58

Just cross posted. Didnt realise it was ancient either.

mootime · 08/01/2014 09:58

It will be fine. We had this last year, and DH had abut of a midlife crisis at the time, but we needed more space and better schools and so we had to move. For us it was the area aswell that we needed time to adjust to. But a year on, a lot of white paint and a few less walls and we feel like this really is home. Maybe not forever, but at least a good ten years.

You will get there. A big un-mumsnet style hug and a large tin of paint is what you need.