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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed that DS gets hardly any homework in YR 5?

111 replies

olimpia · 07/05/2012 20:56

That's it really. Wondering what is a normal workload for yr 5 pupil. He gets 1 piece of literacy homework a week where he has to research something on the Internet without any indication of required length so he's over in 15 minutes. Sometimes he gets a few maths exercises too. Some weeks he gets nada.

OP posts:
Original poster
olimpia · 07/05/2012 22:37

mrsterry I'm not pissed off with you and I'm not pissed off with people who think IABU for thinking he doesn't get enough homework. I'm enraged by those who without knowing me or my family question my parenting skills because DS has been playing a shooting game that DH'S bought for him.
I just don't understand why people feel
the need to turn nasty like that. They're probably just miserable cowards in RL.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 07/05/2012 22:46

To be fair, you did ask if you were being unreasonable to be annoyed that your DS gets hardly any homework.

So there's no need to be annoyed with people who say 'yes yabu'...because you did ask Confused

I don't blame you for being pissed off about the Halo thing as that's not what you're asking.

Original poster
olimpia · 07/05/2012 22:49

If you read my post again you'll see that I say that I'm NOT pissed off with people who think IABU because of the homework thingy.

OP posts:
iscream · 07/05/2012 22:51

What I'd do in your shoes is take the Xbox away during the week. It doesn't matter if he sulks.
You are the parent, you have to set and enforce the rules.

WorraLiberty · 07/05/2012 22:51

Oh yeah so you did Blush

Well anyway, my advice is still the same.

Try limiting his time and allowing him to get bored...that way he'll probably find a hobby to fill the boredom.

QuintessentialShadows · 07/05/2012 22:59

If he is tired after school, and he only does rollerskating for sports once a week, maybe he is simply unfit? Sitting on the x box creates unfit children with poor health. I think that is a bigger concern than any lack of homework to be honest!

Sometimes I feel like Mrs Scrooge herself, as my poor son has to put up with Multi sports on a friday (after school club), fencing on a thursday and swimming on wednesday. He gets lots of homework too, and sees a tutor every monday for extra maths (big gap due to moving back from overseas) We think he does very little with only three regular activities, so he will start saturday morning jogging with dad. The more they do, the more they manage, tally ho!

QuintessentialShadows · 07/05/2012 23:00

Actually.

Sell the xbox and buy him a trampoline.

MrsCornish · 07/05/2012 23:12

sounds a lot like my ds. i dont think homework matters til secondary school (i never had any didn't do me any harm etc...). what does engage him, apart from xbox games, is 'coding' type exercises on the PC. Things like scratch and sketchup are perfect. you can find projects on youtube (you can vet them to make sure they are 'safe'!) and he can follow the steps to create his own projects.

BorisJohnsonsHair · 07/05/2012 23:17

Why on earth are you concerned about the amount of homework he does at age 10? I think homework is pointless until secondary school. If you don't want him playing on the Xbox all day, then don't let him. You're the parent, he's the child.

My DS would spend all day on the PC if he could; I let him spend a certain amount of time on it (playing on Scratch, Bin Weevils etc), then make him stop and do something else/go out and play/come out with me etc.

You don't need to blame the school for his Xbox habit - that's entirely down to you.

bogeyface · 07/05/2012 23:21

He'll get enough at seniors, dont push him too hard yet. My DD, also yr 5 , doesnt get any homework at all and she is G&T, but I know that she will get some next year to prepare her for the onslaught at high school!

And it is your job to ensure his time is spent productively, if we as parents didnt do these things then we would all have obese lazy TV addicted kids.

LynetteScavo · 08/05/2012 20:59

You said you didn't want him spending all his time on the Xbox, I gave you some advice.

I wasn't judging you, but now I've learned Halo is a 16C, I'm judging your DH, and will advise you too look at the boxes of any games your DS is playing.

Some DC get lots of homework, some get very little. It sounds like your DS gets an average amount.

I asked DS1's year 4 teacher why he had brought no homework home. (I didn't phrase it like that, I presumed DS had been binning it). She said "School is for written work, home is for riding your bike and playing football. She was a fab teacher. Smile

If you don't want your DS to do something, then make sure they don't. I really don't get it when parents complain their DC does something all the time, but let it continue.

Original poster
olimpia · 08/05/2012 21:46

What do you mean you "don't get it" when parents complain of a child's behaviour? What's there to get? Clearly lynette you must be a better parent than I am because you make your children do what you want. Well guess what, even if you adopt the dictatorial style of parenting which my parents had with me and which I loathe as soon as you turn your back they'll go back to doing what they want or even worse they'll do it more because you dont want them to do it.
That's not to say we should let them do what they want but please don't make it sound like it's easy to correct your child's behaviour especially when they're not tiny anymore!

OP posts:
eeden · 08/05/2012 22:00

I wouldn't be happy with a Y5 child getting that little to do for homework. My DS is in year 1 and he has 10 minutes per day. 3 x per week, this 10 minutes is just a reading book, the other 2 days, it will be writing a little bit. Regardless, I do think that DS having 1:1 support from me doing homework for 10 mins per day makes a big difference. In fact, at the parents evening, the teacher said that it is clear that I make an effort to help him and it is really helping him and to carry on doing it. Doing a bit of homework each day is a good habit to get into IMO. Education is a partnership between the school and the parents.

joanofarchitrave · 08/05/2012 22:08

Well, if you just want info about how much homework other children have, my ds has about 30 mins a week I think. It doesn't sound like your ds is getting much, no although he's getting loads more than I had at his age.

Have you considered getting him a tutor? If you want him to make more progress and do higher-quality projects it might be worth considering?

FredFredGeorge · 08/05/2012 22:13

eeden but if education is a partnership, why do you want homework? homework is the teacher dictating more time be spent on the tasks they think important, rather than what you and the child believe's important, or is appropriate to what you're doing. A weekend you're visiting the beach for the first time would be better spent learning about the geography behind it than whatever happened to be in school that week.

But more importantly as LynetteScavo's teacher had it, getting exercise - fitness having a much higher correlation with performance in school than homework.

exoticfruits · 08/05/2012 22:24

Sounds wonderful to me. Use the time to play chess, read, cook, get out and walk-anything. He will get plenty of homework in years to come.
This is the problem- there is a huge number of people who want to get away from homework in primary school and I remind them that it only started because parents pushed for it- as proved by this thread.

Original poster
olimpia · 08/05/2012 22:27

eeden yes totally agree. I'd be happy with 30 min. every day because like you put it "it's a good habit to get into" and a way of growing up and learning to be responsible and keep to deadlines.
fred he doesn't need a tutor. The moan about the homework had nothing to do with his performance at school. He's top of his class in literacy and maths. When he gets homework I'm happy to do it with him and support him but if doesn't get it I can't manage to persuade him to do work of an academic type.

OP posts:
Riversidegirl · 08/05/2012 22:41

Wasn't there reports that to much computer/xbox can make kids depressed? He'll do more that grumble if you leave him on it most of the time. It's a parents job to upset the kids sometimes...prepares em for real life... it won't always go their way.

Let him be a kid and celebrate his childhood with him.

Lovelynewboots · 08/05/2012 22:48

My daughter is year 5 and has a termly project she has to complete on top of her homework, (which is an average amount, about an hour a week). This has focussed her attention and encouraged us to go out as a family to museums in order for her to gather information and we have worked together on certain aspects. It has worked for us any way.

ToothbrushThief · 08/05/2012 22:55

My DD gets zero homework which does and doesn't bother me. I think she'd benefit from spellings and times tables. If she had homework it would cut into time I spend with her though.

I have done times tables with her and seen huge improvement. We make it a game with sweets (sorry dentist) and have also done fractions (chopping up huge marshmallows) and ratios (jelly babies vs wine gums) etc

Currently we are looking at % and triangles, times and money. I do 3 x 30 min sessions per week. She reads to me/on her own for 30 mins 5 night of the week and practices a musical instrument for 15 mins 5 times per week. I feel her time is more structured and the aimless doss in front of the TV is less. Having said that she still has plenty of time for the aimless doss... (I like it and so does she)

To those that think I'm a pushy parent ...well yes I guess you could be right but the main aim was to focus her a wee bit and improve her schoolwork because I felt she was coasting. She loves one to one time with me. That is a real bonus - our 'work' is fun and we laugh and tease. I really enjoy it and I am fairly certain she does as she asks to do it

minimisschief · 09/05/2012 08:23

omg people halo is fine for a 10 year old. There is unsuitable in the game.

you fight monsters and theres no blood or gore

wordfactory · 09/05/2012 09:47

I'm in a very small minority on MN that think homework (short, proprly focussed and regular) is helpful. In fact, I don't think you can become decently proficient in certain subjects, MFL for example, wihtout the little and often routine of homework. A bit like when DC learn to read, ten mins every night is the very best method.

However, OP, if your school don't give much, you need to make sure you're challenging your DC yourself. Make sure he does somehting other than X Box (we all know how many hours can be sucked up by screens!).

How about introducing sport, a musical instrument and of course reading every night.

GooseyLoosey · 09/05/2012 10:06

I don't really like homework for primary age children at all.

My ds (yr 4) has about 20-30 mins homework a night (although by the time he has got books out and thought for a bit, it takes much longer). I hate it and cannot see what he gains from it.

He does lots of things after school - football, cricket, martial art, swimming and musical instrument. All of this used to be fine before homework increased to its current level. Now he is faced with giving up some or all of the things he loves or having no time at all to just sit and veg (which I think he needs).

On the otherhand, I think it does instil some good working practices and some much needed skills in relation to organising time. Ds can procrastinate like you wouldn't believe and now he struggles to say "I'll do it later", because later he will be doing something else.

Need to find a better balance though.

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 09/05/2012 11:47

My DS is year 5 and he gets one piece of literacy and one piece of maths. Personally I think homework at primary school is a complete waste of time..when I was a kid we didnt get homework till secondary school and I wish it was still the same.

Limit the X Box. My DS would be on the iphone and wii all day and night long if I let him - I have a cut off time and then he has to come off.

If you want him to do some more school work then just set him some yourself.

Finocchio · 09/05/2012 11:53

My yr 6 gets about 20 mins homework a week - a bit of maths and a few spellings. I like her not getting loads, but she does mooch around restlessly and wants to watch TV too much. She does thrive on having things to do, structured activities rather than lots of time to fill (unlike my other 2 who can fill their time quite easily).

If I'd been really organised I'd have her learning an instrument and going to French classes (they learn a pitiful amount of French at her primary). But those plans fell apart, but she does have various clubs- youth group, judo, art, pottery, maths club, and I do like it that she's not limited in these activities by homework needs. It means we can choose what she spends time on rather than the school setting things.