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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to go to pils for lunch?

60 replies

startwig1982 · 06/05/2012 09:01

Just to clarify, this isn't a pil bashing thread as they are lovely! We go there for lunch every blooming Sunday as they're only 20 mins away. Today we're going to a christening with lunch after, so I told DH to phone mil and tell her we're not going for lunch. Now she's upset and DH is upset and asked me if I'm avoiding pils!! ffs Angry
it's just one sodding Sunday!! Please tell me ianbu

OP posts:
Flisspaps · 06/05/2012 09:17

So did you mention it last weekend or during the week when you actually saw her?

GateGipsy · 06/05/2012 09:17

If you go every Sunday, then I'd have told her as soon as you got the other invite. I'd be interested to know how your DH told her and what her response is really. It just sounds a bit unlikely given that you guys see so much of them, and you get along just fine.

Could it be more likely that she's surprised that you didn't mention it earlier and is herself thinking, but why if they had this invite all those weeks ago, and we've seen them several times this week, didn't they mention it? She knows it is no big deal for me as I just get stuff out of the freezer. So there must be something else to it. Perhaps we've done something and she's now avoiding us?

TheHouseofMirth · 06/05/2012 09:17

So if you've seen her twice this week why didn't you tell her yourself?

Salmotrutta · 06/05/2012 09:19

I don't understand any of the timeline about who told who what and when Grin

Get on the phone to MIL (you say they are lovely so shoul be fine), say that you thought they knew you were out today. As her why on earth she thinks you are avoiding her by going to a christening.
Tell your DH to stop being a schoolboy - he knew about this christening too after all!

Salmotrutta · 06/05/2012 09:20

Can anyone explain it all to me?
Please? Grin

Original poster
startwig1982 · 06/05/2012 09:20

I did! I told her last weekend and tbh it slipped my mind this week when we saw each other. Maybe you're all right and she's a bit put out, but I don't think she's like that, really. Anyway, we are seeing them tomorrow for a soggy walk in the rain and lunch, so I daresay it'll all be fine.

OP posts:
lucyellensmumnamechange · 06/05/2012 09:23

that was fairly quick backtrack there startwig, well done

Salmotrutta · 06/05/2012 09:25
Confused

Eh?

imnotmymum · 06/05/2012 09:26

Is it just me but sometimes threads start and canvass opinion then go oh it will be ok they are great. If you know that why ask ?? Originally you told in your OP that you told DH to phone and then you say you told her and Oh I am confused ?? I think it U to be spending so much time with in PILS [but that just me I guess]

Salmotrutta · 06/05/2012 09:27

That was to OP btw.

Ah well, all's well that ends well, many a mickle maks a muckle .... and other such useful phrases. Grin

DPrince · 06/05/2012 09:28

This doesn't make sense, you go every week but only actually get invited a couple of hours before. She was told today/ yesterday and last week?. No offence it doesn't add up.

Original poster
startwig1982 · 06/05/2012 09:29

Since my original post, DH has phoned again and suggested going out tomorrow. Sorry for lack of clarity, I know it's confusing.

OP posts:
HateBeingCantDoUpMyJeans · 06/05/2012 09:29

Do you can never do anything else on a Sunday Confused

Original poster
startwig1982 · 06/05/2012 09:30

We go every Sunday for lunch but will also be invited on other days with just a couple of hours notice (I'm so crap at explaining - sorry Blush)

OP posts:
Salmotrutta · 06/05/2012 09:34

Why does your DH think you are avoiding his parents because you are all going to a christening?
That's the bit I am most confused by?

imnotmymum · 06/05/2012 09:34

Do you have kids??

TheFallenMadonna · 06/05/2012 09:35

You should have made sure she knew. Of course she's irritated.

I don't get the bit about your DH being upset. That's ridiculous.

Original poster
startwig1982 · 06/05/2012 09:38

No idea salmo.
We have a DS, imnotmymum. He's 11mo and gorgeous!

OP posts:
imnotmymum · 06/05/2012 09:41

Just wondering if you both bored as spend so much time with his parents. You have a DS so how about on a Sunday just chill together.

Salmotrutta · 06/05/2012 09:43

Your DH needs to sort himself out - he has no business accusing you of avoiding the PIL.
He's going to the christening too!

Original poster
startwig1982 · 06/05/2012 09:45

That would upset everyone!! I don't think pils would say anything but I think if we stopped going then they'd be quite hurt. I don't really mind going every week but just want to be able to do something else once in a while without feeling guilty.

OP posts:
GreenEyesAndHam · 06/05/2012 09:46

Your DH is upset and asking if you're avoiding PILs- because you're all going to a christening?

I don't know quite how to put this..is he..a bit hard of thinking?

doormat · 06/05/2012 09:48

in other words your dh has had a rollicking off is mummyGrin

imnotmymum · 06/05/2012 09:49

startwig you need to man up. You have a family now and Sunday is family day. I am not suggesting you stop seeing PIL altogether etc as that is so lovely to have a close family but really you need to break free [singing Queen now I want to break free, i want to break free..>]
Green "hard of thinking" can I pinch that phrase so funny !

Original poster
startwig1982 · 06/05/2012 09:51

They're both sensitive souls I guess. DH is very clever, but just a bit weird...

OP posts: