AIBU to be pissed off that people keep telling me what I can and can't eat?

[FluffyJawsOfDoom]

I'm 18 weeks pregnant. Since "coming out" at 13 weeks, I've had "you can't eat peanuts!" (err, yes I can), "OMG you can't eat cheesecake, it's got cream cheese in it!" (WTAF? It's pasteurised AND I baked it!) and "you should steer clear of shellfish you know" (WHY???)

I am an intelligent person; I have researched what I should and shouldn't eat in pregnancy. AIBU to be severely narked that people suddenly assume I'm an idiot feel they can dictate to me what I can and can't eat especially considering they're WRONG ? And AIBU to be at myself because I'm too stunned at their audacity polite to tell them where to go?

Wait! I can eat shellfish?! I've been avoiding it and I would KILL for prawns

Well the thing with listeria is that you can have very mild symptoms but the bacteria can cross the placenta, so the foetus could get very sick or die without you realising there was a problem.

So it's certainly wise to pay extra attention to potential sources of listeria, but I'm not sure blanket advice like "don't eat soft cheese" helps when you have women avoiding feta (not a likely source) but scoffing pre-prepared sandwiches.

Properly cooked prawns are fine.

You can eat whatever you want.

I agree that it's not just soft cheeses, only mould ripened ones.
I think there's a lot of confusion over exact things to avoid which is why you get a lot of judginess from others. The nhs website is quite good.

I'm now craving peanut butter on toast

The confusion also leads to some pregnant women avoiding lots of healthy and nutritious foods because they have misunderstood the advice and don't know what the actual risks are.

The list of things pregnant women are supposed to avoid unquestioningly and face public censure if they don't is quite pernicious IMO.

Listeria is far more dangerous in pregnancy because it can kill the foetus. It's not so much about you as the baby. :(

We seem to become public property when pregnant, and yes it is annoying. Also annoying is the complete lack of consistency in advice - I've been told by one GP to avoid runny eggs altogether, a HV said eggs with the Lion stamp are fine. One source says avoid mould ripened cheeses altogether, another says if they're heated thoroughly (like breaded Camembert or something) they're fine because the heat has killed the bacteria. It tend to just read the NHS website advice and go by that.

*I tend... Not it

I'm in the south of France and because of the heat bacteria are much more likely to be present in the food so the advice is repeated all the time - anything that might be harbouring bacteria like listeria is best avoided although of course it's up to individuals to decide which risks they want to take.

One of my horses had suspected leptospirosis and I didn't touch any of the horses for 2 weeks until the results came back clear as it can cause an MC. Again lepto is much more prevalent here due to the heat.

No one suggested a glass of wine to me and there were no drinking and no smoking while pregnant posters everywhere.

I didn't like peanut butter until halfway through my second pregnancy. I felt such guilt while scoffing several peanut butter and nutella sarnies.

Thanks to MN though I did enjoy the pasteurised Brie-type cheese from Asda.

Must look for some of this pasteurised brie-type cheese, I could kill for a bacon and brie bagel...

YANBU but you'd better get used to it! Even worse is people thinking they have the "right" to feel your bump! WTF is that about? They don't know you half the time, they don't ask permission, they just walk up to you and say something like "Oh, I can't resist touching" or "doesn't it feel amazing?" Arghhhh!
If it's someone you know then keep a mental note of all the stupid things they tell you and quote them back at them when they are pregnant!

Pasteurised Brie is horrible, it's mostly what you get in the US instead of proper Brie.

I'm not sure making it with pasteurised milk removes the risks of listeria, does it?

a guy at work asked me, looking extremely shocked, if that was a beer i was drinking.

i said "yes. and i assume you are the pregnancy police?"

he looked like he wanted the ground to swallow him. "oh yes, well, you know, it's obviously your choice"

me "um. yes. i know. "

it was non-alcoholic ffs
i can't believe the gall of people to even comment on such a thing... imagine!

do i run up to men smoking outside the pub and squawk about how they're going to get prostate cancer???

AThingInYourLife the places some people seem to think pregnant women shouldn't be= anywhere serving alcohol, apparently. I've been dirty looked in a couple of pubs, and last weekend I went with DH to a friend's birthday in a restaurant on the same road as a lot of bars. And got stared at. I've gone right off alcohol, as it happens, and am very fortunate because I don't like eating most of the things we're advised to avoid anyway, but that's hardly the point.

For me it was sushi. Every time I had it at work, someone would come up and say "Should you be eating that?" As if you are going to say "Ooops, now you come to mention it..."

Having never ever had anything even resembling food poisoning before, and knowing that the majority of food recommendations are to try and combat this, I didn't avoid anything. And anyone that commented, I just told them that my grandmother did the same and she lived, as did my mum, and me!

I was scared witless by the blabber about peanuts. In my mind, I thought if I ate peanuts, my kids in utero, would be exposed and therefore fine. As soon as possible , I tried them with peanut butter...they're fine! Prob nothing to do with me eating peanuts but they're fine. Stress during pregnancy is the worst, all the scaremongering isn't good. Use common sense and you and baby will be fine X