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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to ask who you are most jealous of?? (and don't really like telling anyone about)

66 replies

FayeGovan · 01/05/2012 17:40

I'll start

I'm jealous of a friend who is a lovely person, but goddammit she has everything

a dh who earns a fortune so she doesn't need to work, kids all at school

she has perfect kids, who are easy going, eat everything and sleep like logs

she has a lovely, but house with nice things in it, she doesn't compromise and go to argos to save a fiver when that's all I seem to do

she has siblings close to her who help out with elderly parents so all the worry and stress isn't left to her

they have 2 cars so she isn't stuck in when the car is being used

I am jealous of her, she is really nice and I'm awful to be jealous, but am human so am admitting it on here

OP posts:

NiceHamione · 01/05/2012 22:01

people have said to me that they are jealous of me, although they do not use the word jealous but say something along the lines of " I wish I had what you had"

But it is always about where I live, my husband, clothes etc. I don't get that kind of jealousy tbh as those things are either meaningless or there is a trade off .

But I totally get being jealous of being able to have children or spend time with them.

musicismylife · 01/05/2012 22:16

I am jealous of women in poor countries who have nothing, but still manage to make-do and smile.

hiddenhome · 01/05/2012 23:04

Nobody, to be honest. I'd like to be a bit thinner and perhaps have a foreign holiday once in a while, but apart from that I'm happy I'm me and can't think of anyone that makes me jealous.

flyingspaghettimonster · 01/05/2012 23:10

I would be jealous of a mom at the school who has a gorgeous, clever son, twin daughters (ivf as the other way wasn't fast enough), great house with a pool (she redused to move in until a pool was added), great social life with tonnes of friends, buys anything she likes (turned up for school run on a fancy moped just coz she fancied it...), babysitters whenever she fancies a no-kid day, holidays about every month it seems... Took the twins to disney for their birthday! To a new person at the schoolyard her life seems perfect.

I know that while she was pregnant with the twins her husband screwed 30+ strangers off craigslist in dodgy motels... So I know her life isn't perfect and how hard they jave worked to salvage their marriage and cope with his sex addiction.

So I am not jealous, because I wouldn't have the strength to be her, knowing that, every day.

mythical · 01/05/2012 23:14

I'm jealous of all the ladies at the antenatal classes that have already had their lovely babies whilst I'm sat here being dangerously close to going overdue for a long time :( :( :(

Firawla · 01/05/2012 23:19

noone.

as some others said you don't know what else is going on in their life that you can't see.

i have had people openly say they were jealous of me before, for things like that (maybe not so much now that i have 3 kids 3 & under and look stressed out half the time!!) but because of things like finding a husband easily while they were still looking for years, not having lot of financial problems etc, doing well in studies easily -a couple of people would be like oh you got everything on a plate, your life is so easy bla bla yet there is a lot of things that if they knew, they wouldnt think that way so it just made me think i will never be that way about anyone cos you just dont know.

GoingToThePark · 02/05/2012 06:07

People who are really, honestly happy with their menfolk. I don't know that he will ever be the one for me :(

It makes my future look uncertain. As I know he will always be a compromise.

Also people who look good all the time, I have potential but am seriously bad at choosing outfits and being bothered with hair and makeup. Wish I was more groomed.

Guinnessisgoodforyou · 02/05/2012 06:38

I wouldn't swap my life for anyones and I have dealt with a large amount of shit. I am stronger for it and jealous of noone.

CailinDana · 02/05/2012 08:25

I'm not jealous of anyone because in the past people have said they're jealous of me. That has shown how pointless it is to be jealous of anyone. From the outside I might have appeared to waltz easily through life (met a fabulous DH young, got a first in my degree, walked into whatever job I wanted etc) but behind it all I have had to deal with the repercussions of abuse and a shit upbringing, along with depression. I put on a good show of having it easy, because I didn't think anyone cared about the real me. Today I gravitate more towards people who are open about the difficulties they have in life because "perfect" people remind me too much of how I used to be. There is no such thing as the perfect life, it just doesn't exist.

mayaswell · 02/05/2012 10:00

I have envious thoughts when I look at people who have made the most of their opportunities, worked hard and done well, especially if they are the same age as me.
I wish I'd done the same.

YonWhaleFish · 02/05/2012 11:36

I get fleetingly jealous over shallow things - like my friend having a fab figure etc, or what seems like a better financial life than me. It's only fleeting though, I like to repeat to myself what I have that is great.

porcamiseria · 02/05/2012 12:13

my maternity cover

when I was on leave a contract i had been nurturing came in for ALOT of $$ and she got a massive bonus. and the MD wants to fxxk her

and I suspect that when she comes back from her maternity leave they will cut my role in half as there is no job for her right now

I like her but see her as a genuine threat to my role

KeemaNaanAndCurryOn · 02/05/2012 12:16

I am jealous of a very clever friend of mine who has a brilliant career, fab DH, slim and attractive and financially secure.

She's also lovely and kind and down to earth so I can't even dislike her for it, dammit I just accept that on this occasion Karma got it right for once.

LadyWord · 02/05/2012 12:22

People who have lovely, capable, caring parents/relatives on hand, to help with the kids, or to just get on with and have a nice relationship with. The woman across the road who has sisters with families and they all hang out together/look after each others' kids. Friends who have grandma living nearby and she can do a school pick-up or take the kids for a weekend, or go on a day out/holiday with the family and not be a total PITA.

But I know I have a lot that some other people are jealous of. Just that one thing would make the biggest difference to my life though.

trikken · 02/05/2012 12:29

Jealous of one of my best friends, shes gorgeous and lovely and good taste in clothes. Though I know her life isnt perfect and works hard for all she has.

BreconBeBuggered · 02/05/2012 13:32

Keep the brilliant careers and lovely men. Who knows what goes on when outsiders aren't looking? What I envy is the friendly approachability and easy manner some people have with just about everyone. I get on fine with people on the right wavelength, but would love to feel less like a gawky awkward teenager with the rest of the world.

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