to feel patronised and judged by this nurse.

[watchoutforthatsnail]

I have pcos. I am on the pill to help control the symptoms. Last time I saw my doctor she gave me a years worth and promised she would never take me off it. I take it for pcos more than contreception, since ive been single for over 3 years.

In feb I went for my review appt where the nurse told me I needed to lose weigh. She would only give me 3 months worth and told me to come back. That was awful enough, she did acknowledge that I was fighting a loosing battle with it though.

I tried to view this postively, as had already started a diet and was cal counting on my fitness pal. At 1200 cals a day, I should have lost 1.4 lbs a week.

Weight loss is harder and slower with pcos. But I was hoping to get there.

As with a lot of people with pcos, I have disorted eating, and in futuile attempts to lose weigh I do cut my cals to 500 or so a day, that maybe, if I'm luckly let me lose 2 lbs a week. The doctors know this. My weight goes up and down by 2 stone yearly, because you can't substaine that kind of diet.

I don't want to keep doing that, I want to break the cycle, so vowed to stay away from the scales so I don't get disheartned, and just log my cals. I figure slow weight loss, but ill get there. There have been a few days each week where I've been 800 cals, but ive tried so hard to get it back to 1200.

I saw the nurse today. I have gained 2 lbs. She pulled a face at me and told me I wasn't trying hard enough. I burst into tears, because I am, and I have. Ive been on no carbs, lean protein, veg, no sugar for 4 months, and I've gained.
She told me Im not doing it right and questioned if I exercised. I do. Lots.
I offered to show her my Eating logs, she didn't want to know, just told me to get my weight down because I'm too heavy.
I asked her what I should do and she said she didn't know.

The worse thing is, if she takes the pills off me I'm less able to do anything About my weight, and balloon. And end up hsvibg to shave my face twice a day, and other awful things.

She's refered me back to my.doctor, but in the meatime I'm to ' try harder'

:(

alberts - thats it, the guilt and shame of not being thin. Thats the kicker. It really is, thats the bit i struggle with, more that my actual size, iyswim.
I dont think i look bad, not really. but then all this bmi must be under 25 stuff, and i just cant get there, and then i feel ashamed, and like im not trying... well, which is what the nurse told me, im not trying hard enough.

it kicks my self esteme to shit. it really does.
but i cant fix it, no matter what i do, so again, i feel like ive failed. Its horrible.

im definatley going to push for the metformin, had a bit of a google, it does seem to help. always worth a try.

thanks to everyone who has replied and posted, it has really helped and i feel in a better place emotionally than i was this morning.

Glad you're feeling better about stuff in general.
(and check your PMs - you may not have noticed you have one - if you have but don't wish to reply, that's fine :) )

Bless you - you sound in despair. I agree with others that the nurse is out of order - if I were you I would email the practice manager to make them aware of her brusque manner. I would also refuse to see her again -ask to see the doctors who are more sympathetic.

You do sound like you have terribly disordered eating. I know bugger all about PCOS so hopefully the advice re metformin will help you.

Eating so little is awful - really must make you feel terrible as well, plus knackered I would imagine. Calorie counting (especually when it doesn't work) is soul destroying.

Looking at what you eat, it seems as if you eat very little fat - which (as counter intuitive as it sounds) doesn't help with weight loss, especially if you are following a general low GI diet, and it does sound as if you could be insulin resistant. I don't know if you have read a book call Escape the Diet Trap by Dr John Briffa, it is enormously helpful re why some ways of eating lead to insulin resistance. www.amazon.co.uk/Escape-Diet-Trap-John-Briffa/dp/0007442432/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1335872230&sr=8-1. If you want to plese have a look at the low carb boot camp threads in the weight loss topic on here - they are really helpful and have loads of links and explanations on how a higher fat diet helps lose weight (I have just lost 2 stone of steroid bloat since following this way of eating since January, I don't calorie count and eat lots of healthy food).

Please don't starve yourself any more. You sound terribly down in the dumps. Surely for your mental health it is better to carry a few extra pounds than starve yourself into oblivion. I had no idea that PCOS caused such issues.

Even though I know doctors and nurses are not infallible and even though I know much more about PCOS and my problems better than most of them will I still allow myself to get unnessecarily upset when one of them trots out the eat less exercise more line. So I understand how shit you felt after your nurses visit.
And I'm not even half as fat as I used to be when my PCOS was at it's worst.
At one point I got my BMI to 24 and my periods stopped and I felt awful and looked terrible. . A sympathetic GP told me to put on a stone and everything came back and I felt much better. Not everyone is designed to be thin despite what we're being told.
Chin up.

My BMI is nowhere near that now unfortunately - I though I'd better add in case you thought I was one of those people who put on a few pounds and complain they're fat.

no, i do eat fat, there is a fair amount of cheese in my diet :) and olive oil. and eggs, and oily fish. i try to eat good fats. i do sometimes fail :)

i will check out that book and the thread though.

i have awful eating, i know this. its just this cycle that has happened from not being able to lose weight, and only being able to control it by starving because of the pcos. its probably my own fault. i should have put my foot down sooner and not hid the problem by starving so it wasnt an issue any longer.

but you know, its hard to to that. and to go aganist nurses and things. AND i only got my pcos diagnosis 3 years ago, took ages to push for that too, it was only when i hadnt had a period for a year and all the other issues got me to breaking point, that they did the blood test, until that point noonw wanted to know. but thats another story.

i dont think many people know pcos causes such issues, its not their fault, but it does compoud the ' you arent trying hard enough, because you are still fat' thing, you know.

I am fed up with it, its shit. but i cant change it. i just have to work out a way of living with it i guess. and avoiding rude nurses is one of those things.

alberts - thanks. its so hard isnt it, because they are people in power, authority figures really, so you expect them to be gospel. but its not like that

I did cry, quite alot lastnight, but still cooked my dinner and ate it, because its worse to not eat. Though i did think about going back to not eating again.

i dont know, its hard. my self esteme is a bit shock up again from yesterday, but im trying hard to convince myself its not me and my efforts, ive not failed. its a medical condition and i cant control it.

it still sucks arse though.

lowest i got my bmi too since i was 22, is 28. ans thats usually 6 months of starving.
6 months starving, 6 months to gain it all back, and repeat. every god damn year. its not good.

I was diagnosed with PCOS at maybe 18 or 19. I went to the Dr because my periods had stopped and after tons of tests etc I was told I had PCOS and that my periods had stopped due to my weight (I was 21st then, so a BMI of 53).

I didn't watch my weight really- I knew I was fat, so fat it affected everything I did but I assumed I would be that way for ever. I'm a binge-eater, my probs are far wider than just the PCOS but I was told it was severe and possibly would need surgery if I didn't sort out my weight. Which I didn't, I had no idea how to.

About 7 years later I lost 4st using Rosemary Conley, which is low GI and low fat. I was so strict, I walked up to 12 miles a day- had a pedometer, sometimes logged more than that but usually over 8 miles. Then I'd do an aerobic class, a DVD or a run (waddle) every day. Miserable and repetative but I did it. But not sustainable, when I lost my job and moved abroad I gained again.

I've been struggling, really struggling with healthy eating etc. Last December I weighed in at 15st exact, and I decided to take a different approach. Been doing a lot of reading- I can really recommend the John Briffa book mentioned up thread, as well as Wheat Belly. I had a turnaround- reducing carbs and sugar makes sense. However I have other issues so I have taken it to an extreme, I'm currently on a VLCD (similar to Cambridge and Lighter Life) and this month I droppped below 'obese' BMI for the first time in my life. I'm struggling, I am, but I'm trying to get to a weight to maintain, this isn't sustainable. I'm down to 11st 7, and I hope to lose 2 more stone on this then use the plan set out in the John Briffa book.

Extreme I know, I'm currently on 600-800 cals a day depending which packs I have and if I have meat and veg too. It has worked for me, but you have to be in the right mindset to do it- as I've proven this last weekend when I fell off the wagon completely!

Sorry for the essay but I've spent most of my life wishing I was a BMI of 30! You have way more going for you than I did. I'm 29 now and have wasted my life.

I think you should try and be a wee bit more co-operative and understand the nurse's POV. You are taking a drug outwith the recommendations, she could be in some way accountable if you had a serious side effect (blood clot say). Your symptoms being worse are not caused by her and we unfortunately do live in a world where people apportion blame very readily. Perhaps you could ask to be referred to a dietician or endocrinologist, or try a different pill, something pro-active instead of defensive. You will get more results working together, good luck.

I'm afraid I'm not posting from a position of knowledge. I'm just posting because I want to make you feel better. I'm so sorry things are bloody crap for you at the moment.

The only practical advice I have for you, is that if the shred (shudder- I'm too terrified to try it!) was working for you, and you felt good, then you shouldn't give it up, just because the nurse made you feel shit about your BMI staying the same.

Try it again, maybe?

Oh, and by the way, you HAVEN'T gained weight. Two pounds is normal variation in weight. You're a living human being, with complicated processes going on, not a tv set. When I weigh myself over the course of a month, my weight varies by 2 pounds up and down at many points, which returns and departs. Water retention, needing the toilet, slow digestion, dehydration... That kind of thing.

I would entirely expect a fluctuation of 2 lbs up or down if you're trying to maintain your weight right now$

Glad you're feeling a little better OP. Totally agree with what others said re brekkie. Yep- yoghurt like Muller (and I'm guilty of eating these too) has got sugar and artificial sweetener in it and these chemicals can really mess with hormones. Low far natural yoghurt with either maple syrup or agave syrup is low GI and may be better.

Didn't have time to read through thread but Dianette is a pill that's often prescribed for PCOS sufferers.

Also agree re getting your thyroid tested but I also think a full endocrine blood work up would be a good idea just to check hormone levels and see if there's anything else amiss.

I really feel for you. I was diagnosed with PCOS when I was about 23 and suffered in the same way as you until starting Dianette. My BMI is 30 but I'm a size 14/16 and have just had a baby almost ten months ago and I really should eat more bananas less cake