to feel patronised and judged by this nurse.

[watchoutforthatsnail]

I have pcos. I am on the pill to help control the symptoms. Last time I saw my doctor she gave me a years worth and promised she would never take me off it. I take it for pcos more than contreception, since ive been single for over 3 years.

In feb I went for my review appt where the nurse told me I needed to lose weigh. She would only give me 3 months worth and told me to come back. That was awful enough, she did acknowledge that I was fighting a loosing battle with it though.

I tried to view this postively, as had already started a diet and was cal counting on my fitness pal. At 1200 cals a day, I should have lost 1.4 lbs a week.

Weight loss is harder and slower with pcos. But I was hoping to get there.

As with a lot of people with pcos, I have disorted eating, and in futuile attempts to lose weigh I do cut my cals to 500 or so a day, that maybe, if I'm luckly let me lose 2 lbs a week. The doctors know this. My weight goes up and down by 2 stone yearly, because you can't substaine that kind of diet.

I don't want to keep doing that, I want to break the cycle, so vowed to stay away from the scales so I don't get disheartned, and just log my cals. I figure slow weight loss, but ill get there. There have been a few days each week where I've been 800 cals, but ive tried so hard to get it back to 1200.

I saw the nurse today. I have gained 2 lbs. She pulled a face at me and told me I wasn't trying hard enough. I burst into tears, because I am, and I have. Ive been on no carbs, lean protein, veg, no sugar for 4 months, and I've gained.
She told me Im not doing it right and questioned if I exercised. I do. Lots.
I offered to show her my Eating logs, she didn't want to know, just told me to get my weight down because I'm too heavy.
I asked her what I should do and she said she didn't know.

The worse thing is, if she takes the pills off me I'm less able to do anything About my weight, and balloon. And end up hsvibg to shave my face twice a day, and other awful things.

She's refered me back to my.doctor, but in the meatime I'm to ' try harder'

:(

i only drink water. I might occassionally have a low cal hot chocolate, but yesterday was warm, and i would have logged it if i had.

I think ive been drunk twice in the last 4 months, on both occassions ive logged what ive drunk ( and eaten)

ive done the cycling like a crazy person. I can lose weight if i go to low cals, like 500 and exercise for 2 hours a day. This is not something that is substainable for me. it just not. And i get to the point where im cancelling seeing friends because of fear of having to eat and not having the time to exercise. As i said i have disorted eating, this is on my medical notes and it caused by the situation i find myself in ( and usually the reaction of the damn medical profession)

I need to be on the pill. It minimisises a lot of my symptoms, without it i gain weight at a quicker rate, have to shave my face twice a day, grow hair on my boobs ( this is so embarassing) have awful acne, very very greasy hair and skin. I also get no periods, so end up a hormonal mess. I need the pill to function, and to be honest without it.. i dont even want to think about it. My doctor promised me she would never take me off it, because any medical risks are mitigated by my mental health if i were dealing with those side effects. The thought of that nurse taking me off them is, ah, i cant even contemplate it.

and its all very well to say stop counting cals, but when you are constantly being told you need to lose weight, by the medical profession, and if you dont the outcome is the above, in terms of symptoms and my life. then no, i cant do that. Ill just gain even more weight.

yes, i dont eat ' diet foods' because of the sugar. light foods are rubbish. i only eat fruit that you eat with the skin on, such as apples and pears. or berries, the rest are too high in sugar.

This is the thing, i have been following a low gi diet, with cal control. I know about loosing weight. I know what i should and shouldnt eat, and i follow it.
I do exercise, and always have.

I know bcp and the risks of being over bmi of 30. I know this, yet my doctor gave it to me knowing this.

Firstly, sorry you're having a hard time of it, and that nurse does sound awful - not very caring for someone in a caring profession.

I know very little about pcos, but wondered if you'd tried other Pills? I really struggled with weight loss until I went to a dietician who suggested changing my pill. I was on microgynon, which she said was known to cause weigh problems. I changed to Yasmin and lost 2 stone. (If the other pill you tried was cerazette then I
agree it was not nice!)

Apologies if this has been suggested earlier, haven't time to read all but wanted to put forward the suggestion.

And totally agree with seeing your doctor about managing your medical condition.

I find a combination approach worked for me. I don't have PCOS though. But you may find that getting shot of "diet" foods might help, low fat does not = healthy.

Where you get the calories from is important. I second the scrambled eggs suggestion. I have scrambled eggs every morning, with butter. I'm then full - properly full, don't want to eat anything else - until lunch. Protein is A Good Thing.

Your lunch and dinner sound great - but I would eat more of it!

I've not done any formal exercise whatsoever - apart from a bit of Wii fit - but I walk everywhere since I don't drive, and I walk very fast.

I am a bit similar sounding - I gained weight on slimming world (pasta being a free food = A Bad Thing. I could have eaten pasta until it came out of my ears.) I've lost 6 stone by NOT obsessing about food (I found both SW and WW increased that obsessing) and by learning to make good, healthy choices.

Starving yourself is not the answer, because it is totally unsustainable, and the nurse was BU by criticising without offering support.

What about exercise?

My friend has PCOS and has struggled for around 30yrs with her weight (all her life really)

Although she walks everywhere (long, long walks in the country) and rides a bike, she's been told she need proper rigorous exercise and plenty of it.

i eiher have salad with lean protein or scrambled eggs for lunch, with salsa stired though, not with toast :)
i dont eat low fat, fats are good for me with pcos, obviusly keeping within cal goals.

i dont eat diet food, or food that is processed or packaged or frozen. I try to eat foods that you buy that are a close to how the come, ie - fresh.

pasta or any carbs are the worst thing in the world.

and if i eat more food i GAIN more weight. if im gaining on 1200 im going to gain on 1500. This is a fact, else i wouldnt be fat in the first place, would i.

a pill change might be in order, im on loestrogen 30. and have been since i was about 19.
not cerazette though, that was the evil one that made me bleed continously.

ive been walking a dog daily for 10 years :) i can swim a mile in under 45 mins :)- which i do weekly.

Ive done the shred and didnt lose a lb.

ive done crazy mad cycling for hours and did lose weight, but that was in conjunction to a 500 cal a day diet and is not substainable for the rest of my life. nor healthy.

You sound a bit like you have an eating disorder to be honest.

Can you afford to possibly see a dietitician or maybe a personal trainer?

i have disordered eating. not an eating disorder.
its really common with pcos sufferers, because they find them selevs in the same situation i am in.

When i finally got my diagnosis, and brought a ton of books i just sat there and cried because i finally realised i wasnt the only one like this, and other people had the same problems, especialy around eating/ not eating like i do.

I love food :) its my favourite thing, and im a real foodie and a wicked cook :) i dont throw up or purge. I dont stave myself forever, and my bmi hasnt been in the normal range since i was 22. So im not annorexic. You cant be a fat annorexic :)

and as i said, i love food :) especaially cheese.

This is all on my medical notes. Which is why the nurses comments hurt.

Since jan ive been trying to beat this ' eat 500 cals a day, lose weight, then gain it back when i go up to 1500 a day' cycle. I dont want to live the rest of y life like this.

So, i set out on my fitness pal, it recommended a 1200 a day diet, ive been eating clean, logging ALL my food AND drinks and ive not lost a lb in 4 months.
then i got told off fromt the nurse yesterday for not trying hard enough.

I came home and cried. and i feel shit. my instant reaction is to stop eating because of waht the nurse said.

But im not going under 1200 cals a day. Im going to stick with it, print the whole damn thing off, take it to the doctor when i see her. I am not going back to starving in a bid to lose a few lbs. that is not right. ANd if im not loosing,then something must be up and i shall ask for blood tests etc...

I know the situation, I have been there.

How do you FEEL? Do you feel fit and healthy? Can you run up a flight of stairs without getting puffed? Are you sleeping well?

It took me a long time to stop worrying about it all, my weight eventually came off with some heavy weight training and very low carbing over a period of years, but it didn't come off while I was worrying about it all. It came off when I changed focus from what I weighed and looked like to how I felt and what my body can do.

It all sucks, but you might need to accept that you just won't get thin, but you don't need to be thin to be well.

Good luck.

See that's what my mate does...dog walking every day and swimming once a week.

I think you need a proper cardiovascular workout rather than that maybe?

You have much sympathy from me.

The gynae consultant made me cry (i literally left the appointment, burst into tears and had to run out the hospital) when she said I had to loose weight to make the symptoms better. I had been bleeding heavily continously for 3 months straight at that point, really heavy, clots and everything (sorry if TMI) and that was why I was there. So guess what, I had had to give up going to the gym to save any embarassing situations.

I too find it really hard to loose weight, I can eat nothing or tonnes and it makes no difference. I had hyperemesis in pregnancy and lost a little, but not much. I was slim until after birth of ds, when i started having the problems with month long periods and it all went pear shaped.

morloth - i feel fine :) i run up and down 3 flights of stairs at work, lots of times a day :) i sleep fab. ihave a quite active lifestyle i think.

I feel awful when ive overdone the carbs, very sleepy, and tired and physically very boated, and bad skin and greasy hair. So, ive learnt to listen to body and to mostly avoid them.

I think i need to accept i wont be thin, and thats that. And that if i can mantain a bmi of 30, that would be great. Im working on it, its a work in progress :)

it just doesnt help when nurses are as rude as yesterdays was.

worra, i wont make a blind bit of difference. Its not caused by crap eating or lack of exercise, its a hormone disorder thats caused it, it cant be fixed by sweating like a pig. And as a lone, working parent, i have neither the time, nor inclination, because its all a balance, to work out for hours a day. Its not worth sacrificing hours with my child to spend hours sweating. its just not.

I am a fellow PCOS sufferer and I know that the symptoms are much worse in people who are overweight.

You need to get your eating sorted out - you SHOULD NOT be reducing your calorie intake to less than 1200 a day because you are fucking your metabolism over. Come up with a healthy meal plan for a week that gives you around 1,200 calories per day and stick to it, giving yourself a treat once or twice a week.

As for not losing weight when doing the Shred, of course you won't, because you are building lean muscle which is denser than fat, so you will lose fat but not pounds.

Metformin can be useful for controlling the symptoms - could you speak to your doctor about giving you a 3 month trial of Metformin? It's usually given to women with PCOS who are trying to conceive as some research has shown it reduces the risk of early miscarriage for PCOS sufferers. I lost about a stone when I was on it.

I agree with other posters that you do seem to have an issue with food - not necessarily an eating disorder, but definitely a bad relationship with food. Are you seeing food as an enemy that is in cahoots with your PCOS?

No advice, but just wanted to add my sympathy and admiration for how well you're managing to hold it together in a difficult situation. Nurse sounds daft - a new colleague joined us quite recently and even I, through knowledge gained on Mumsnet alone, was able to work out that she had PCOS before she mentioned it.

Check if you don't have a thyroid gland problem.

no, food its not the enemy - i love it :) really.
i have food issues caused by this inability to lose weight thing i have.
and the shred was great, and i did enjoy it, and lost inches, BUT and hers the but, by bmi is over 30, i need to lose lbs, i know i was building muscle, and thats great, but the nurse doesnt give two shits about that, shes just wants to see the lbs less. she doesnt care how i got there, just that i got there.

this is the problem, and ive been dealign with it my whole adult life.

im going to ask the doctor for metformin and a thyroid check too, and as i said am not going to go below 1200. im going to stick with it, print off my food log from my fitness pal and take it in.
And im not going to be fobbed off and pushed into the situation where im starving myself just so i fit on the bmi scale any more.

This sounds awful. Is there no other treatment for PCOS?

It might be worth investing in one of those more expensive set of scales that work out your true BMI by passing a mild current through the body and working out what is fat and what is muscle. My husband's BMI is 32 if you use weight/height for the calculations, but on one of those scales his BMI is 27 - still higher than it would be but he is one of those big built men who carry a lot of muscle.

You can buy them at Argos or Boots.

It does sound awful

But I have to say, every time someone suggests anything to you...you seem to be placing a brick in front of you and building a wall.

If you don't change what you've got, you'll always get what you have I'm afraid.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

Who gives a fuck what the nurse wants?

She can fuck the fuck off.

Been there too, it doesn't help, it just makes it that little bit harder.

The head game is the hardest bit.

Ignore the nurse, don't have checks with her in the future, just see your GP

Hugs

its just because ive tried it all.
ive done slimming world, weight watchers, crazy exercising,cardio, shred, weights, etc.... ive done eating, not eating. nothing kind of makes any difference. which is why im sat here in despair, after trying to stop the madness, get a grip of it as of jan this year. and to again, have got nowhwere with it.
its soul distroying, thats all.
and then the nurse tells me im not trying hard enough.