RE: dirty nappies and public transport

[ThisIsANickname]

About 5 minutes into my journey into work this morning, the train carriage I was on began to smell and it became very apparent very quickly that the source was a baby's dirty nappy.

Fine. Babies do that. No one blames the child.

But the mother, who had a seat just behind the pram, decided that the best way to deal with this was to change her baby right there on a rush hour train. She lay them down (awkwardly as there wasn't much room) on the seat she had been on, and proceeded to change the soiled nappy.

It was horrendous.

AIBU thinking that this was completely wrong? I mean, really? EEW!

If you can change a nappy on a seat without mess, surely you can change it in the pram

G1nger, why can't you put the changing mat IN the pram then?

I dunno, OP. It sounds grim to me. But surely the bigger question is why public transport is so un-parent friendly in this regard? It doesn't sound like she really had much choice.

I'm sure if I'd been on that train and seen your catsbumface I would have

politely suggested you get off the train so you don't have to witness such horror

i mean .rilly

I would have done exactly what that mother did. Trying to move your pram and maybe another child off to the loo and wedge yourself in that tiny space. I wouldn't want to lie my child down on a piss stained floor. YABVU. I can remember Michael Macintyre talking about a woman breastfeeding on the tube and showing all her breast and couldn't she be more discreet on one of those god awful panel shows. Are you married to him?

YABU.

If the train had baby change facilities and room to manoeuvre a pram., I am sure she wouldn't have used a seat.

Changing a nappy where food is prepared or eaten is disgusting and people really shouldn't do it, it's not fair on the diners who have paid for their food.

However, in this instance, it was not the buffet car, she had little choice and probably did it swiftly and cleanly.She probably should have put something down like a newspaper or an empty carrier bag, but sometimes, as a mother, you just have to think on your feet and do your best in the heat of the moment.

I might judge her slightly for going on a train journey without a changing mat. If i'm going out somewhere where I can't be sure of facilities I do try and be a bit better prepared. But otherwise.... grim all round but one of those things.

Bad ThisIsANickname for not wanting to look at or smell shitty nappies during your commute. How unbearably rude of you.

Siddartha change the baby's nappy by all means but don't expect people to be thrilled by it. People can make all the catbum faces they want when they smell fresh poo. Rilly.

This was on the tube? So no toilets on the train at all and barely any of the stations have toilets even if she had got off.

She did what she had to do.

Get off the train and find a toilet with a changing station?

What sort of fantasy railway do you travel on? Round here, the facilities are not totally awful but for sure, I'd not spend all morning nipping on and off trains on the offchance that there would be a beautifully appointed changing area.

I think people are far too precious about these things. I mean, yeah, its a bit gross but in the grand scheme of things I don't care

yabu i personally love sitting where babies have been pissing and shitting.

I've done it before, I put down a mat and more recently I've done the same on a plane. Well on the plane we had bulkhead seats so used where the skycot thing went as I couldn't find a toilet with a table. On the train I had to as I had a pram and a pretty empty carriage, I wasn't about to leave my expensive pram to search out a toilet which may have changing facilities but in all likelihood be closed as is the case on most of the trains around here.

Oh and I wouldn't be getting off the train as along this route if there are toilets they are like outhouses and I would be waiting for 30 minutes at least for the next train.

I can't see what the problem is tbh, she changed the baby to protect it's skin and probably couldn't give a monkeys about someone else's sense of smell. If it was that bad then you could have moved.

YABU

So was she supposed to leave it in its stinking nappy?

Baby would have eventually started to HOWL the carriage down
Mother would have felt AWFUL
Commuters would have ALL started to whinge tut (feel superior) towards poor mother

She was trying to change the nappy DISCREETLY

If she had got up to take baby to the train bathroom, she would have lost her seat, where would she have put her stuff, would have struggled (possibly missed her stop) in a tiny ill equipped bathroom...

give mothers a break? You could have EVEN offered to HELP her...I dunno...minded her pram and seat while she did a quick awful trip to bathroom to sort it out?

SPEAK UP NEXT TIME AND HELP A STRUGGLING MOTHER when youre out and about

grrrrr

I think it must have been some poo to need changing right away!

IMO they never smell as bad when contained in the nappy, its not wonderful but not a problem on a train really.

I wouldn't have changed mine in the same situation , unless I was alone.

Each to their own ...I won't judge

YABVVVVVU. Get off the train to change a nappy - are you outright mad? TBH even going to the toilet in itself may be a difficulty with a child (and its not like they are spacious and hygienic) and then faced with the prospect of having to stand as someone else has taken her seat, nah i'd probably opt for a quick change on the seat myself.

It's situations like this that make travelling with a baby so bloody stressful. Give the poor woman a break instead of looking down your (delicate) nose at her - she did the best she could in the situation she was in.

I actually don't really care where people change nappies. If you do it on a mat, chances are the poo will not escape the mat. The smell is momentary

YABU. The only way I wouldn't have done the same is if I was due to get off the train in 5 minutes or less.
Oh and if I saw anyone trying to snatch the seat of someone who had left it in order to change their baby, I would have words with them, because that is unreasonable too.

it is an illusion that such places are clean anyway as during the midnight hour tramps probably piss, shit ,come and god knows what else on the seats that you then sit on the next day- think on.

So, if I understand correctly, the crux of whether or not someone is being unreasonable is whether or not you would have done the same?

Yes, I would have expected her to change the child in the pram or leave the train because I don't think that being a parent automatically means that your comfort and convenience is more important than anyone elses.

But clearly, I am in the minority. Lesson learned.

Maizie - exactly, I can't believe anyone thinks the seat would have been clean anyway :)

DS's skin used to get welts and bleed if he was left in a shitty nappy for ages. I had to change him at the local tip once for want of a better option. In that mother's shoes I would have decided that there was no contest between my baby's poor arse and your poor nose. Possibly in more than one way.

Oh well, at least you have accepted that you are wrong. That's good :)