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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that its not that difficult to get ready for school?

60 replies

BananasInBloomers · 27/04/2012 17:27

I walk to DCs school everyday. Recently a neighbour approached me and asked if I could walk her two kids as well (8 and 9 years old).
I agreed to.

Except that every morning they are running late. My DC1 is in the next year up so goes in at 9:15am,the others go in at 9:20am. I have my four ready to go at 8:50am which leaves us ample time to get there. By the time the neighbours kids are ready its 9:05am and DC1 ends up running ahead so as not to be late.
They are very slow walkers too.

WIBU to just leave them if they are not ready by 8:50am? The parents don't work so no time clashing there. I can't see why they cannot get the children ready on time. I've told them what time I leave at.
I mean they are older kids,so can dress and wash themselves.

OP posts:

MaureenMLove · 27/04/2012 17:29

Leave them behind. If they are not ready when you're ready to go, sod 'em.

Why, if they parents don't work are you taking their kids to school anyway. They are lazy buggers imho, until you tell me there's a good enough reason!

TheFeministsWife · 27/04/2012 17:30

YANBU. If the parents don't work why can't they get off their lazy arses and take them themselves?

elliejjtiny · 27/04/2012 17:32

My lot take forever to get ready but then we get up earlier to compensate. Also they are younger (5, 4 and 1). YWNBU to leave them but I would probably just sigh and fume to myself.

Gumby · 27/04/2012 17:32

Why on earth did you agree if they don't even work?
Or are they disabled maybe?

Original poster

BananasInBloomers · 27/04/2012 17:33

Well I don't know tbh. There actually is no reason why they can't do it themselves.
Would I be a bitch to just leave them,making them quite late for school?

OP posts:

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 27/04/2012 17:33

What on earth school do your DC's go to that doesn't start until 9:20am? My DD's have to be at school by 8:25!!!

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 27/04/2012 17:34

Oh and sorry no YANBU to walk straight past their house at your normal time. If they are ready, then they join you. If not, tough bollocks.

I wouldn't even break my stride.

You are very generous!

Jinsei · 27/04/2012 17:35

Yanbu. Your own dc should not be late because you're waiting for other people's kids.

Goolash · 27/04/2012 17:36

They should make the effort to gave the kids ready for you, it's rude to be frequently holding you up. I think you would be reasonable to tell them that you'll drop by at xx time and certain if they're not ready.

Did they not offer to take turns with you? or walk them home?

They're lazy buggers if they don't work, haven't offered to share the school walk and expect you to do it. I'd be finding away to tell them to get lost.

Original poster

BananasInBloomers · 27/04/2012 17:37

I originally thought it was a one day favour but that was my mistake.

OP posts:

PurplePidjin · 27/04/2012 17:38

YANBU, however are you completely sure the parents are actually getting up and not just leaving the dc to get on with it?

Original poster

BananasInBloomers · 27/04/2012 17:39

Im in ireland Hearts

OP posts:

HeathRobinson · 27/04/2012 17:39

Just tell her, if they're not ready, you're not waiting.

Chilenachica · 27/04/2012 17:44

I wouldn't leave the children, not their fault they got those particular parents, but I would tell the mother that it's not working and so you will not continue taking her DCs to school. Just for the record, it takes my DDs ages to get ready, but they are the only ones who will be effected.

3duracellbunnies · 27/04/2012 18:07

I am in similar position, though good reasons they find harder to get to school. It really drains, sounds easy, but I find it stressful, theirs are late, but then go too fast for my 5 + 2yr old to keep up. Have had to be firm and ban scooters if they go too far ahead. Looking forward to when they can get on walking bus FT. It is nice on days when we're not on w. bus to have leisurely stroll when I want to and chat with my children.

I think talk to parents, say happy to do it one day a week, but that your 4 need your attention too. They are being lazy if you have 4 and they only have 2, plus neither of them are working. Will chivy my neighbour re walking bus again.

Mayisout · 27/04/2012 18:09

Yes, just say eldest DC has been late for school so it is not working, sorry.

takeonboard · 27/04/2012 18:13

Tell them what time you will be walking by, if they are not ready and at the door or window by then, you won't wait - I am pretty sure they will make sure the kids are ready by that time or they will have to get off their fat arses and walk themselves

Original poster

BananasInBloomers · 27/04/2012 18:16

I'm going to have to bite the bullet and talk to them. I hate confrontation but I suppose it has to be done. Poor DC1 must be so flustered by the time she gets to class.

OP posts:

NagooIsBuildingAnArk · 27/04/2012 18:20

Yup, what everyone else said. Don't wait for them.

toastandmarmiterocks · 27/04/2012 18:33

I used to do a walking bus. Hated it! The pressure. We all had 3 children and would take it in turns but either I'd be waiting and waiting for someone to take mine to school when we were ready on time (or waiting in the street for the late comers if it was my turn to take them) or sometimes the others would be 5 or 10 mins early to collect or ring on the door bell waiting to be taken to school. At that time of the morning every minute counts!

I ended up pulling out of the walking bus and mornings are much calmer now. I will of course help out if the others are desperate but I didn't want it to be a regular thing.

I would say to your neighbour its not working out, your DC are getting anxious about being late etc. but you will help out in an emergency.

foreverondiet · 27/04/2012 18:35

I would just say you can't wait as oldest late for school.

If they are ready then fine, if not then not. Just say you'll knock on the door at 8:50am and if they are ready they can walk with you.

Moln · 27/04/2012 18:43

sounds a bit feckless really, if they have no work they have to get to then expecting you do walk their children to school every morning is inexcusable.

YANBU

you might not like confrontation but you'll be take for the fool till 6th class if you don't speak up!

MaureenMLove · 27/04/2012 21:33

DO NOT suggest, you'll knock and if they are ready, they can walk with you! No doubt the mother will say, 'oh they're just coming' or 'hang on just a minute' Things won't change at all.

Simply say, they need to be outside the front door at 'x' time. If they are not there when you walk passed, then you will carry on to school.

fivegomadindorset · 27/04/2012 21:36

say to them this is the time we leave (10 mins early than you would uusually leave) if your DC are not there by then then we will go without them.

Bonsoir · 27/04/2012 21:37

Yes, I agree with other posters - tell your neighbour that you are very happy to walk her DCs to school with your own providing her DCs are ready and waiting as you walk past her house and that you will not wait for her DCs.

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