Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

In thinking my boyfriend has a boyfriend?

40 replies

chipsandmushypeas · 25/04/2012 08:47

My DP came home last night from a lovely expensive restaurant where he had wined and dined with his friend.
This morning, while in the bath he said they're going for a walk in the park on Saturday and then for lunch after checking out a new gym that's opened.
He also announced hat his friend wants them to go on a relaxing holiday in June together.

Well am I?!

Bit of background, we've been together 3 years, live together and I'm pregnant with our first so will be 4 months gone in June, which isn't a problem I guess.

OP posts:
TheSinglePringleWillicopters · 25/04/2012 08:48

It's the start of a bromance.

Psammead · 25/04/2012 08:49

It's a Bromance. Aww.

If it's annoying you, tell him that you'd like to be included more!

Callisto · 25/04/2012 08:49

Why isn't he doing these things with you? Confused

WorraLiberty · 25/04/2012 08:50

They went for a meal

They're going for a walk and a meal on Saturday

They want to go on holiday in June.

Unless you've got some other kind of concern, I don't see any of that pointing towards homosexuality Confused

Original poster
chipsandmushypeas · 25/04/2012 08:50

Ah! Of course! A bromance, why didn't I see that

OP posts:
Debsbear · 25/04/2012 08:50

Have you met this friend? Did he call it "wining and dining" or did he call it "going out for a curry"? The way it's been worded sounds a little odd but you would be able to gauge more if you had seen them together.

minimisschief · 25/04/2012 08:50

doesn't mean he is gay. i'm sure you do things like that with your friends

TheSinglePringleWillicopters · 25/04/2012 08:51

Wait till he starts talking about him all the time and saying so so thinks this!

SomebodySaveMe · 25/04/2012 08:51

Ah bless them.

I love watching a bromance blossom.

Original poster
chipsandmushypeas · 25/04/2012 08:51

It's a light-hearted thread worra

Also, he went around to my house to pick up my brother and was with said friend. My sister remarked she had never seen my DP so chipper and grinning before. He's always like that when with his friends. I can't even get smile out of him sometimes! Git

OP posts:
Housewifefromheaven · 25/04/2012 08:52

Holiday? Just the two of them? Errrr. Yanbu. Your boyfriend has a boyfriend!

WorraLiberty · 25/04/2012 08:52

Ahh I see Blush

MN is so weird at the moment, I wasn't sure!

Original poster
chipsandmushypeas · 25/04/2012 08:54

Don't worry. I really don't think he is gay, just do feel a little taken for granted, but that's what happens when you see eachother a lot I guess. Novelty wears out etc

OP posts:
TheSinglePringleWillicopters · 25/04/2012 08:56

The novelty may never wear out so be warned. My ex is still in a bromance with a guy he went to.college with!

They even take my son out together like a couple. It is funny to watch

QuintessentialShadows · 25/04/2012 08:57

You should see this film It is actually excellent.

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte · 25/04/2012 09:04

I never knew there was a word for it! DH is the most wonderful bromantic..

YouOldSlag · 25/04/2012 09:13

Well it all sounds very sweet but when he wants to spend more time with the friend than you, then alarm bells would ring.

Not because he might be gay, which I don't think he is, but because if you are having a baby together he needs to be doing at least some of these things with you and forging bonds with you as his future life partner and co parent.

I'm not saying he is doing anything wrong, but if his free time is spent say 70% with friend and 30% with you, then he needs to think about priorities a bit.

BillyBollyBandy · 25/04/2012 09:16

Yes yes, I am a bromance widow. DH even has the object of his affections as his "favourite" on his phone. And they go out to new restaurants together

Original poster
chipsandmushypeas · 25/04/2012 09:29

They've been friends since they were 18, he's 32 now so I guess this is a long term love. I'm just worried he will do this once the baby comes, of course he should go out with his friends but I hope we'll be the priority!

OP posts:
Original poster
chipsandmushypeas · 25/04/2012 09:30

Also, when my friends invite just me out to dinner I always say to bring their partner and make it a foursome so DP isn't left out!

OP posts:
BillyBollyBandy · 25/04/2012 09:51

I don't do that, I love my nights out on my own. IME that is when the bromance really flourishes, you know, couple of beers, sat on the sofa, kids asleep upstairs - maybe a good movie on tv... Grin

INeverFinishAnythi · 25/04/2012 10:55

Sounds like to me.

puds11 · 25/04/2012 11:05

Grin Worra you can never tell these days!
Ah this is what i term a 'friend crush' it's harmless and always dies down a bit, its just the first flushes of bromance.

ChitChatFlyingby · 25/04/2012 11:11

Just think of him as a wonderful 'uncle' to your DC, who will spoil them and with your DH will take them on days, leaving you with lots of lovely time to yourself!!! (Whether they like it or not!!!! Grin)

If the friend doesn't have a partner, children area great for attracting attention from women, apparently, when they call out 'Uncle X'.

saffronwblue · 25/04/2012 11:13

YANBU. Very sweet. But not OK to go on dates friendly outings leaving you to wrangle a newborn. When the baby comes you need to be at the centre of his world.