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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not give a fuck about schools?

569 replies

sensuallettuce · 20/04/2012 21:13

AIBU to be totally hacked off with this subject every bloody year.

I don't care that Saffron didn't get into your first choice school even though the local school is varie good she just isn't "suited" to that "environment" all the council estate kids Hmm.

It's such thinly veiled snobbery and competitive parenting at its very worst. Kids should go to the local school end of and if there is a grammar system state educated kids should be permitted to take the entrance exam (not privately educated kids who are trained to pass an exam) and this should be means tested.

I live in one of the most competitive school areas of the country with a massive social divide (Poole in Dorset). Because of this I ended up with all 3 kids at 3 different schools for 3 yrs Hmm.

How can people bang on about the state providing a perfectly good education then spend an extra £50,000 on a house in the "right" area. It's hypocritical snobby bollocks.

Kids will learn if they want to. I do not believe any of them have faired any better or worse due to my non choice of school. They are fulfilling who they are.

They have a loving home and are well balanced grounded kids and they know if I believe they have been "wronged" I am behind them 100%, if they have done "wrong" I am behind the school. I a, supportive of and interested in their education.

We all need to bloody calm down about this seriously Hmm

OP posts:
porcamiseria · 20/04/2012 21:38

if all state schools were more mixed, that would be a wonderful thing indeed

but it aint gonna happen

Original poster
sensuallettuce · 20/04/2012 21:39

Not if we continue with this attitude - no it won't.

OP posts:
GrahamTribe · 20/04/2012 21:42

ComposHat, who's talking of wanting their average child to become a genius? Many who shun crappy local schools and/or who want a choice are seeking to ensure that their child is happy, that the school meets the parents' moral standards and viewpoints or spiritual ones, that their child is considerably less likely to be bullied than in the local school, that the school will encourage good manners and social confidence etc. It's not as black and white as merely wanting a school which will provide the best academic education.

porcamiseria · 20/04/2012 21:42

the whole schools thing has upset me a bit
we just applied for the nearest school, and we got in

but seeing friends/family doing the whole church school/moving house thing made me feel, I dont know... like they would look down on the school we chose?

only one friend I know actually just applied for the local round the corner school

it saddens me

usualsuspect · 20/04/2012 21:43

Nope its never gonna happen

Original poster
sensuallettuce · 20/04/2012 21:46

Surely school is about learning all those things Grahamstribe?

And with this sectionalised society we create the morally "poor" kids will ever gain any better role models than the maybe less than perfect ones they have while they remain in the majority?

OP posts:
wigglesrock · 20/04/2012 21:46

There are lots of topics/threads on Mumsnet I don't give a fuck about - I don't read them, let alone start threads about how I don't give a fuck about them .

GrahamTribe · 20/04/2012 21:46

Am I reading this right? That you think that if we all sent our DC to the local school it would create a more mixed intake? If so, that means that there would be a nice mix of council estate working class DC in Dulwich Village school and an equal mix of children from professional middle class backgrounds a couple of miles down the road next to the huge council estate in Brixton.

Wouldn't it?

Oh. Perhaps not.

NowThenWreck · 20/04/2012 21:46

Well, yes, in theory YANBU. BUT .. I tried to get my kid into the nearest school, and he got sent to one bloody miles away, just because it was a huge year and not enough school places. It was not feasible to get there, so we moved.
It's not always that simple.

PandaNot · 20/04/2012 21:48

I am in a very fortunate position of having a job which involves going into most of the schools in the county. As a consequence I observe a LOT of lessons. The worst lesson(s) and behaviours I have seen in a comp were in a school which is considered the best in the city, due to it's exam results. Similarly some of the best teaching I have seen has been in the 'crap' schools. My children won't be going to the 'best', they'll be going to the local one.

usualsuspect · 20/04/2012 21:48

So whats actually wrong with having a mix of children?

Haberdashery · 20/04/2012 21:48

What AThingInYourLife said. I personally know of a few people in my borough whose children have not been offered a place at ANY school. It's not a case of little Saffron, it's a case of just wanting a school place at an actual school somewhere (anywhere) in the same borough for your child. In their shoes, I too would be panicking like fuck.

Original poster
sensuallettuce · 20/04/2012 21:48

Good for you Wigglerock - have a gold star :)

I'll remember to ask your permission before I start a thread next time.

OP posts:
wigglesrock · 20/04/2012 21:49

No bother, its just if it pisses you off so much every year I suggest you need to calm Grin

wigglesrock · 20/04/2012 21:50

oops down

Original poster
sensuallettuce · 20/04/2012 21:50

Nowthenwreck - you moved AFTER.

Pandanot - me too.

OP posts:
AllPastYears · 20/04/2012 21:51

"And with this sectionalised society we create the morally "poor" kids will ever gain any better role models than the maybe less than perfect ones they have while they remain in the majority?"

I think I know what you're trying to say here... Anyway, I really don't think that sending my well-behaved, studious kids to the local school is going to make any of the bruisers who go there think, "Hey, AllPastYears-1&2 are great kids. I know, instead of getting drunk and beating someone up this weekend, I'll stay in and study like they do. Maybe I'll even start being polite to people, and hey, I could take up the piano."

donnie · 20/04/2012 21:53

"faired any better"

looks like you may be in need of a little education yourself, OP. Check your spellings whydoncha Wink

And yes, you are being totally unreasonable. People want different things. Get over yourself!

Original poster
sensuallettuce · 20/04/2012 21:53

Allpastyears - I totally believe it would actually.

OP posts:
ImNotAnsweringIt · 20/04/2012 21:54

Not read whole thread but OP, hear, bloody hear. Thank You.

We got (1st choice) place at our local school, in the middle of a council estate.

Shock
donnie · 20/04/2012 21:54

btw what does 'sectionalised' mean? are you inventing a whole new dictionary all of your own? clever you!

Original poster
sensuallettuce · 20/04/2012 21:54

Donnie on iPad predictive text - although I could be dyslexic couldn't I or illiterate because I went to a shit school?! ;)

OP posts:
K999 · 20/04/2012 21:55

A mix of everything is good at any school IMO. And I do believe that support from home is hugely important.

GrahamTribe · 20/04/2012 21:55

No, OP, I don't for one minute believe that all schools provide the things I spoke of, which is why I'm all for as much parental choice as possible. And my DC are not sent to school to provide others with role models (not that I'm saying that I have suitably role model-ish DC!), they're there to learn. They're my children, not a social service!

porcamiseria · 20/04/2012 21:55

allapst, I know what you mean

BUT in west London, within a square mile you can have 3 schools

1 x naice mc (so everyone with £ moves nearby)
1 x OK
1 x very mixed

Were we to mix it up a but, would there not be more social cohesion? I mean the schools are 5 minutes away from each other