told sorry for not inviting ds to party infront of him

[barbie007]

Picked up 6 year old ds from school. I went over to one of the mums to wish her good luck as they are moving away and she apoloised for not inviting ds to the leaving party that afternoon as she had too many kids. I had a quick look and most of the class was going . Isn't that rude? Not the 'not inviting' my ds but actually apologising right infront of ds and making him aware that there was a party and his friends were going but he hadn't beeen invited. I wish I hadn't bothered with my good wishes.

bit thoughtless yes. But perhaps she didn't know he didn't know. I'd imagine the children are talking about it? I think kids talk about parties they're going to.

Sad for the children left out though. Is it really practically everyone, or just those children who are good friends of the child that's leaving?

Maybe do something nice with your son that day.

Sorry if he's feeling sad or left out.

Better that she was polite enough to apologise face to face than say nothing and allow you to discover (as you inevitably would) that there had been a party your ds had not been invited to. So YABU. You are also being very childish to even consider that you should have withdrawn your good wishes.

It is hard, but imagine how you'd have felt if you found out tomorrow that there was a party and she hasn't said anything to you at all? Maybe she could have had a quite word instead, but like Euphemia said, I would suspect DS already knew.

Pande...Well I think she was childish in apologising. If you make a decision about who is coming and who is not coming to the party then stick by it, don't apologise and right infront of my son. He must have felt left out and then the mother rubbed his nose in it too! Thoughtless really

Thanks justhecate:)

AIBU?
Yes
No I'm not.

If she 'd mentioned it at another time, fine. But she apologised right infront of ds as she was taking all the kids to the party. As I said, rubbing his nose in it. It was a very brief conversation I had, I just said good luck and all she had to say was thanks.

Have you seen the guest list?

Does your son care or do you?

I expect your son already knew...

She was being polite.

maybe both our noses. Still doesn't make it right does it!

Where did you "have a quick look", out of interest?

ridiculous to apologise, ridiculous reason. Silly woman!

Where is a conversation like that supposed to go: "Sorry you're not invited." Well...I'm not...and what am I supposed to do now? If you're feeling guilty, that's your problem, it's not my role to absolve you of that?

What a moron, she should have just left it.

YABU.

How you you know it was a ridiculous reason?

I agree she might have apologised to absolve herself of gulit, but if you genuinely can't invite everyone, apologising is appropriate, I'd have thought

'too many kids going'

why not ditch one of the others then and make space for mine?

If you make a decision like that, you do it - she's entitled to invite whomever she likes. she's not entitled to be made to feel better for cutting out someone by that person.

^^ was to LadyHarriet

The 'too many children' is a ridiculous reason

It's like a pantomime isn't it?

AIBU?
YABU,
No I'm not,
Oh yes you are,
Oh No, I'm not...

Why not conclude the performance by putting it all Behind You?

Maybe her child came out of school and said barbie's ds is upset about not getting invited so she explained to you (both) what the reason was. Sounds perfectly ok to me. Doesn't sound like you care for her that much!

Perhaps she thought you were about to invite yourselves, and wanted to fend you off

NOr would the OP be entitled to an explanation why her child wasn't invited.

OP - would you expect your child to be invited on the grounds of your and her child being close?

Are you sure everyone else was invited?