To not want to take this job.

[Pinkjenny]

I am a HR Manager. Well, was. I was made redundant in December from my part time HM role, and as you can imagine, there aren't exactly an abundance of part time roles around.

Anyway, I applied for a role at a local University, 6 months maternity cover, earning less full time than I was earning part time previously. I went for the role thinking I would give full time a shot, and whilst it is less than ideal (ds is 2yo at nursery and dd is 4yo at school). I thought I would put dd in after school club three times a week and use the role as a way to see how we get on as a family with me working full time. Despite the low salary, I thought the payoff was the fact that it is five minutes away.

I went for the interview, it was a panel interview, comprising of the person I would report into, her boss and a random. The lady the role would be reporting into (let's call her Jean) just didn't like me, I could tell. She was openly sneering at some of the things I said, so I was amazed when Jean's boss called me later that day to offer me the role. I was slightly confused as to why she was making the call rather than Jean, but hey ho.

I received the contract today, and I had to ring Jean as the salary was wrong and there was no reference to start or finish time.

Jean was perfectly nice on the phone, but seemed to be trying to put me off. I asked about the salary, she said, 'Its not wrong, it's the bottom of the banding' and I explained that I had been offered the mid point of the banding because of my experience. She went off to check and said, 'Mmm, you're out of work (and?) but I suppose you were offered that in recognition of your experience. Yes I am prepared to honour it.' Which is good of her. Not.

After we had established that the flexitime policy didnt extend to start time, she then said, 'there is one other thing, I want to be really honest with you, we have put your postcode into the system and you don't qualify for a car park pass. You would have to drop your children off and then get a bus to work. In 45 minutes.'

Right. I was very nice back, and told her I would come back to her, but she was blatantly trying to put me off!

Dunno what to do now.

It was a comment designed to undermine your confidence. Keep up the sweetness and light (iron fist) approach, it will infuriate her, and you'll be six months pay better off.

I agree with juggling
It's so hard to get a job at the moment
Definitely take it

I agree - I have heard terrible things about HR teams in the university sector. I've seen a few part-time HR jobs advertised lately, it might be worth hanging in there. That said, I've just returned to a full-time role with 2 children (one a pre-schooler) and i think it is better than my previous part time role in terms of balance.

Is there a nursery onsite?

Call back at a different time and discuss it with 'not Jean' instead.

I wouldn't touch it with a barge pole! I used to work in HR but now SAHM. I know that you probably need to get back to work but this isn't the role. I once did a role that in my heart of hearts knew was wrong for me. I lasted 2 years, partly because I did get fab experience and it enabled me to get on in another organisation. But I was single at the time and so didn't have any other stresses so could cope with it. I couldn't have put up with the role and a family.

Oh and in my experience HR is the worst department to be in for bullying. Who do you go to? Once they take a dislike to you there is no way to resolve it. Sounds harsh but been there, done it!

I agree with Pinnapple, the real issue is the attitude of your husband to you and money.

Meanwhile, talk to whoever said they would get round the parking issue.

I'd take the job and destroy Jean.

Thing is its an in, isnt it, and yes public sector does tend towards better work life balance

'Mmm, you're out of work'. She said that to you. What a bitch. If you took the job, would you be getting your next reference from her? That would make me wary. OTOH you could take the job and if your instincts were right, you could make her life hell (and leave early - its only a 6 months contract). If they want to F you up, I am sure you can oblige in return .

OTOH, do you need all that hassle, esp when your children are little? Alternative is to look for something else, and get DH to stick his hand in his wallet meanwhile.

I would e-mail Jean's boss and indicate that you wish to accep the job on the terms it was offered orally to you, ie, mid band salary and a car parking space. Explain that you are a little disappointed that after that oral offer you were offered bottom of scale and the offer of a car park pass has been rescinded.

I would just confirm that you are prepared to accept on the original terms and if they are still available you would welcome a discussion with Jean's boss about why those terms were changed after the initial offer. I would be frank in that discussion and raise your concerns about working with Jean - if your fears are allayed give it a go, it's only 6 months but if they aren't I would swerve it. You only need tell your dh that the terms were not as first discussed and you wouldn't break even.

Good luck.

Id bypass and go directly to the other interviewing lady, Id confirm acceptance in writing, at mid point of scale and with a parking pass.
End of discussion.

married I completely agree.

And the OP's husband needs to stop acting like a twat over money.

What MarriedinWhite says come from a position of "power", and its always good to operate from that - gets alot of nonsense out of the way.

I like CrackFox's idea......

I think you need to check your thinking about this job automatically offering a better work life balance. Many public sector roles do, but non-academic posts in Unis don't necessarily. I have friends in support dept roles who say it's very tough - think an ingrained culture of sexism, but it's directed to non-academics rather than just women. And of course while you haven't gone into the details of the role you've been offered OP most universities are going through challenging times at the moment, with lots of staff lay-offs. I would think the work load would be brutal.

Jobsworth Jean is going to be the OP's boss if she takes the job. Going round her and bypassing her is not going to help matters. It will just piss Jean off more and possibly make people question if the op understands the line management structure.

If she was just going to be a colleague then all these problems, while annoying, would be insignificant. However, she is not just a colleague she is the manager - the person who will agree all annual leave requests, sign off flexi-time, be the point of contact for problems and responsible for appraising and day-to-day management.

If it was an amazing salary and opportunity I'd say go for it and see what happens. But it's not, so run like the wind. The wrong job when you don't need to work is worse than no job.

married you're always such a grown up

I'd tackle DH about money first, you are a couple, to hire a nursery, cleaner, cook, housemaid, home carer etc for his children would cost a fortune I hate the "my money I'm working" bollocks like a sahm is sitting back relaxing arse.

Ahem that said having moved from private to public the work/life balance does tend to be better played off against a certain amount of meeting people like Jean.

I would take the job, then take Jeans job :o

"I would take the job, then take Jean's job"

Classic MN answer !

Excellent advice, all. Dh due in at 8.30, will be interesting to see what he makes of it. I am tending towards married's advice.

Have tried on umpteen occasions to make dh see sense re money. I am wasting my breath.

EldritchCleavage Tue 17-Apr-12 16:44:34
Take it, and make it an uncomfortable six months for Joan.

leave Joan out of it - she's done nothing wrong!

if Jean's real name is Sue I'd give it a miss

I'm thinking it's Linda actually.