Argg PIL

[laughlovelife]

FIL gave dh a freshly caught trout, gutted and deboned it, and dh is cooking it this evening,as PIL are coming for evening meal. I have a big food thing where I cant eat food that has eyes, or looks like its alive, as this obviously does [vom] (in which he is serving on a fish plate, eyes, fins and all]

I have cod here, which I have said I will eat instead, but apparently I am being massively unreasonable, and FIL will be massively offended.

WhoIBU, I didn't ask or what the stoopid fish, I had already planned this weeks meal, which includes non staring fish!!!

It's your house OP. If your IL's are the type to put their stupid serving requirements above your ability to share the meal and feel comfortable in your house, then fuck 'em. They are not worth the consideration.

Cut the bloody head off and have done with it! Don't pander to their dictats!

Its not dh, dh isnt bothered what way it is served, its PIL, they want it served on the fish plate, eyes and all. They do this on good Friday also, however I always make my excuses, and eat at a friends house or stay in etc...

Im not vegetarian, I just dont like, to the point it makes me sick, eating food that has bones, looks like the original thing, in the same way some folk wouldnt eat a tongue, pigs hoff etc... in front of them.

I was actually really ill (sick everywhere) when we went to a wedding, when they had a whole pig cooking on the burner.

FIL is presented them with a fantastically fresh fish. He is proud of having caught it. He has cleaned it and got it prepared it so that it's ready to cook. He has gone to a lot of trouble for you all. It is one of the most delectable dishes in the world.

And you're saying that he can't celebrate his wonderful catch because you can't cope with the idea that it was once a real live thing.

Of course something like that would be presented at the table whole for everyone to enjoy.

Why don't you leave them to it, and go off for a Kentucky which doesn't look remotely like food?

YANBU - I once caused tuts of outrage in a posh restaurant by sending back the fish with the demand that they cut off its head and tail and fins.

He's not done it for the OP's benefit, if she can't eat it. So it's not really for 'everyone' to enjoy, if that excludes the hostess.

Some things do just make a person feel ill - the kind thing would be to serve it in a way that doesn't make the OP want to vomit, particularly when it is being served in her home.

Jux, he could 'celebrate' it at home.

As much as I dislike the whole 'I can't stand meat/fish that looks like meat/fish' thing - go veggie or face up to what's on your plate - it is the OP's home and a gift that makes her feel sick is hardly a gift. And she has offered to sit at the table and eat sonething else while the whole fish is served, but that will apparently 'offend' the FIL. She has compromised. There's no reason the food couldn't be served in the kitchen.

I got served a fish in Japan which was so fresh it hadn't worked out it was dead yet and it's mouth was still moving.

At least you know yours is already firmly dead.

If you chop off the head you will miss out on the best bit - the cheeks! Nom-nom!

See, I used to be a vegetarian and found the idea of eating meat repulsive. So I didn't do it. I am now a reformed vegetarian and would much rather eat a fish that has had a happy life swimming about in a pond than an intensively farmed animal that has been chopped up into little cellophane-wrapped chunks for me. I've eaten fish that I have caught. And ordered meat from a pig at an aquaintance's smallholding. I had previously been shown photos of it running around. It had a nice life. And I am sure it tasted lovely (the order never arrived but that is a whole other story).

lambies and cowies and piggies all have eyes.

I think you should try to get over it.

could you blindfold the fish?

Its all very well saying I should get it over it, I have been this way since I was a little girl, it literally turns my stomach.

well I best be off, I have put my cod in the oven, as it needs to be cooked, however if fil still insists the whole fish has to be served on the plate, I will eat the cod, he can be huffed if he wants.

you dh has to serve it on the fish plate but chop the head of first. he can explain that you don't do eyes

I said you should try to get over it...slightly different

sun glasses on the fish?

sun glasses on the fish?

Look, your DH cooks it and chops off the head. He serves it on the fish plate (which won't disintegrate if a headless fish is placed upon it). In the unlikely event that your PIL ask about the head he says "you know laughlovelife doesn't like anything with eyes, so obviously I couldn't serve it up with the head."

If he won't do that indeed, if that isn't clearly the only way in which he'd consider behaving then I continue to maintain that your real issue is an "Argg DH" one.

Or just repeat your hogroast performance but this time vomit all over the table and your fIL's prize trout. I guarantee your PILs won't serve you fish-with-a-head-on again after that.

You can't chop the head off until you've served the cheeks.

OP will just have to be out of the room until the serving dish has been removed.

You pil sound like loons to be offended by you not wanting to eat something that closely resembles a live fish.
YANBU- don't be forced into eating something you don't want to eat, if all else fails get your dp to chop its head of, eyes etc

Your FiL sounds a bit pretentious.

Serve the fish complete with head but cover the head with a napkin or a piece of kitchen roll.

I did this once - was served a fish with the head on in a restaurant. I cried and my sister had to cut the head off and give it back to me.

I was 6 years old.

I am firmly of the belief that if you can't handle the fact you are eating an animal which has/had eyes, bones, teeth, muscle etc then you shouldn't eat it at all.

Or in other words

YABU.

Agree with others that this must be a Lesser Known Whale Trout. No normal trout would go round two four people.

YANBU. If you don't want to look at a dead fish, you don't have to - perk of being a grown up. Just hold your ground and eat your cod. You aren't responsible for their responses.

What my mother would say, with brusque Kiwi disdain, is 'Oh stop making such a silly fuss, it's disrespectful to the fish'.

My grandpa used to eat the eyes. With gusto.

well he has been and gone, apparently we were given the fish to cook as MIL didn't want her house stinking, as she has guests tomorrow hence why dh got blatantly took for a mug given it as a gift.

I ate the cod, as FIL was being a K* and wouldnt budge, so my dinner is now down the loo, after I given detailed commentary of the squishiness of the eye, and the juices [boak]then stuck is tongue out, dh wasn't amused as mil made a swift exit home, while fil laughing loudly, while "apologising"