To think ffs conduct your private business elsewhere!

[CrystalMaize]

I can hear the private lives of a couple being played out outside my home. Last night I was woken by a woman talking on the doorstep of a neighbor - for 45 MINUTES. This started at approx 11.30pm. What is going on? Does the fine weather affect people's hearing? I live on an estate and we are all in quite close proximity. I don't mind that, it's quite nice to chat to neighbors. I don't, however, want to listen to who shagged who. Through my CLOSED bedroom window! Gah!

At least you didnt find a couple doing something they shouldnt be in an alleyway or something, Not that i have ever done that we understand.

MyLittleMiracle - actually I have seen that but not around here :)

Was it you?

Nope, wasnt me!! I will soon have my own place again. I was 16 when i was like that so all of about 7 years ago, or was i a little older, anyway nothing recent! I am getting a divorce!

Maybe 5 years ago though i was an angel you see as a young lady...... HUH lady where does that come from?

My BIL used to live in a house which was down a little ginnel off a main road. One night he heard noises which he thought might be from an animal in distress. He peered out his front door to find a couple having 'relations' outside. The woman had her jeans around her knees, being very vocal and on his knees was a bloke giving her oral sex . It was pouring with rain and afterwards the bloke gargled and rinsed his mouth out using water pouring from a gutter.

Lovely!

I am sure you are a lady, Miracle! But really, it's still going on! I have details about an unseen man and woman that I'd really prefer not to be think about. Should I shout out of my window "get a room!" ??

I would be dreadfully tempted to, but i am a lady so would put it more like, for god sake, shut up about so and so;s sexual relations and GO HOME"

But then again what do they expect!

How unpleasant for you, Crystal - nobody should have to listen to that.

The thoughtlessness of some people in this respect never fails to astound me.

We are woken now and again, before 6am, by a largish group of young men indulging in fitness circuits in the open square in front of our house. The surface is a fine sort of sandy gravel so, as you can imagine, every footfall can be heard - along with the barked orders of the chap in charge.

We have complained on several occasions, both out of the window and to the office of the group in question - and have been promised each time that it will not happen again

What part of their collective intelligence/conscience is missing, that stops them from thinking - oh, there are houses there - what we doing will disturb the residents? That also applies to neighbours returning late after a night out - we always try to be quiet as humanly possible - why doesn't everybody?

"What part of their collective intelligence/conscience is missing, that stops them from thinking - oh, there are houses there - what we doing will disturb the residents? "
As someone who has often hung out of her bedroom window to ask what the bloody hell you think you are doing - I will share what I was told by such people ...

I lived in a town centre, on one of the streets that formed the town cross, so it was busy and I was regularly disturbed by noise, most of which faded quickly enough (as people kept walking, past my flat) to not actually wake me up, so I didn't bother about them. But sometimes, there'd be a stand-up argument (or on one particularly memorable occasion, a singing workman changing the shop sign below me - at 4am). Most people I shouted at asked replied that they thought the flats were offices. One (the singing workman) thought it was "a bank". (Up a close? With net curtains? I all but screamed back.)

People, particularly drunk people late at night, are thick. The rest just don't think at all. None of them took me up on my offer to return the favour if only they would give me their address .

WhereYouLeftIt - yup, I'm in agreement that it's a combination of thickosity and plain old don't give a shit-ness.

There's no bank or shop confusion here - my house looks like a house.

I have a sneaking suspicion, however, that my teenage daughter is rather enjoying the spectacle of the t-shirt and shorts-clad young men flexing their quads and 'ceps outside her bedroom window - and will be a bit peed off if they finally get the message and sod off somewhere else

Thankfully, the couple have gone their separate ways, it seems. Now I can open window and have some air. Last I heard from both parties was "Yeah. W'va." How romantic!

Ooh, I sympathise. Not as annoying as your example (I actually found it quite amusing) but I was over the park one afternoon and a woman came over with her child. She was on the phone for the whole time we were there (about an hour and a half in total), during which time I learned all about her DP's erectile dysfunction, her child's SN diagnosis, last night's dinner, her sister's operation (on her knee), the hair-dye she was going to use later that night (Loreal Recital) which was going to 'take' while she was shaving her legs (thank god she wasn't planning on doing her bikini line), and how she thought David Cameron was a twat.

You should have told her to post about it on MN, instead.

:) Jessie

love this thread!

a colleague of mine fifteen-years ago a while back heard a scuffling at his front door at about 9pm, opened it and found two teenagers shagging in the porch he lived in a pretty decent area too!

"Yeah. W'va."

I have to ask, what was the singing workman singing?

I could lean out of the window and ogle take potshots with my potato gun?

talc can i have a girlie sleepover with your DD? Tell her i will do her nails and give her crap boyfriend advice

I get this with my neighbours, they can't have a normal conversation even in their living room. I'm sure they think people want to hear their dull conversations.

Ooo I've had the shagging outside the front door thing. I opened it and stared at them. They were mortified Quite a few shops/offices in this street, a lot of people don't realise that there are actually quite a lot of houses that aren't offices, and the shops all have flats above them too.

Oooh no, Stratters and Martha - you'd hate it (my DD would love the nails & boyf stuff, though, Martha )

Not one of those lads is a day over 25 and to top it all, they're all hot and sweaty from their exertions. Their military-issue shorts are a bit on the skimpy side, too.

They sometimes do this piggy-back activity, where they take it in turns to cart each other about whilst clambering over benches and up inclines. It would be quite amusing to watch if it wasn't FECKING FIVE FORTY-FIVE IN THE FECKING MORNING.

DH and I have often considered lobbing something out of the window - like some cartoon alarm clocks aimed at cats screwing in the dark alleyway - but DH has managed to restrain himself to a "come on, fellas; it's a bit early, don't you think?" We're so terribly British

Talcnturnips Why don't you threaten them with a powerful water gun?

NurseJennyLee "I have to ask, what was the singing workman singing?"
He was singing Life's Been Good (Joe Walsh?). Badly. With the wrong words. It's supposed to be "My Maserati does one eighty-five". He kept singing "one eighty-four", so couldn't think what the next line was (because "I lost my licence, now I don't drive" didn't rhyme with 184, duh). So he'd sing that line, then stop. Then sing that line again, hoping to spark his memory. And stop. I think it was that that finally broke me and made me hang out the window and not the big drill grinding into the wall and resonating through my skeleton.

Darts - what a jolly bloody good idea!

And also DD may not find them quite so appealing with their t-shirts and shorts all soaking wet and semi-transparent. Oh no.

Where that has really tickled me, though I most definitely wouldnt have found it funny at the time, singing the wrong words has clinched it, I am literally laughing out loud here.

I thought there were cameras everywhere these days......