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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to find this weird?

51 replies

dobeessneeze · 18/03/2012 21:12

This week, after our cleaner had gone, I found a present for DD in her cot, along with a card and a note saying to give it to DP. When he opened it, it turned out to be a Mother's Day card 'to my wife on your very first mother's day', presumably for him to send to me.

We've had her since just before Christmas on a recommendation from a neighbour (who we don't know). She's nice, very very chatty, although most of her stories are bizarre/bordering on totally unbelievable. She's not brilliant, but the house is definitely cleaner than it was before we got her.

This is just the latest in a whole string of presents that she's started to bring us, mostly for DD, but sometimes for me and DP as well. It's mostly just little things, a bunch of daffodils, baby clothes that are far too small that she's picked up in charity shops and things, although she also brought us a DVD a few weeks back. It's got to the point where she is now bringing us something every week. I think she's just lonely, but it's making me feel a bit uncomfortable.

Every time she does it I say something along the lines of 'thank you, that's very kind of you, but you really don't have to do that', at which point she says something about being 'the present lady', or about how much she wishes she had a grandchild of her own. At first we thought it was nice/funny, but it's been preying on my mind for the last couple of days as to start providing us with greetings cards to send to each other seems to be bordering on plain weird. We were also away for 10 days a few weeks ago, and I think she came back in to do some of our washing after her usual session as all the cleaning cloths were hung up when we got back.

I sound horrible don't I? Why would anyone complain when they have a cleaner, especially one who is fond of us, who does our washing while we're away, and who likes to bring us presents, but it does feel weird. I'm not sure if I should say anything to her, although I don't think it's worth creating any sort of conflict over.

OP posts:
higgle · 19/03/2012 15:42

I'm quite shocked by all the suggestions that a kindly, probably lonely, person should be fired/spoken to formaly etc. What has happened to conversation?
If OP feels uncomfortable then surely the best way forward is to just say so.
Maybe she really wants to make a good impression to ensure she keeps her job. It is a sad world when acts of kindness provoke these responses, or have we turned into a nation of people who can only communicate by text?

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