To say grace when we have a friend round for tea?

[MerryMarigold]

Would you be offended if you are not a Christian and your kid was 'subjected' to a prayer before a meal? We usually do, and ds has a friend over today. I'm really torn.

I don't know whether to stick with what we always do, or not. I don't think God is going to be up in arms if we miss grace for once, but on the other hand, what am I teaching my kids about 'hiding' their religion for fear of being judged/ ridiculed by others. I don't want to upset the mother though.z

Would you be upset?

Just explain to the child that is what you normally do and they can join in if they want to or just sit quietly.

I assume you won't be forcing the other child to join in so no, it really wouldn't bother me.

I'd be offended if my child was forced to join in.

However I wouldn't be bothered if he'd just sat and watched.

I am rampant atheist and I wouldn't mind at all. And my children would know to treat it with respect. I'd be a bit less happy with a full immersion baptism.....

No, I wouldn't be upset

There's a lot of hysteria around people thinking their kids are going to be brainwashed because of any mild exposure to faith and it just doesn't happen.

But I wouldn't say the child could join in if he wanted to. Just in case.

I come from a long line of proud atheists and am vehemently opposed to prayer in schools and so on. Just setting out my stall. I would absolutely not want my child to go round to your house and be the reason you didn't say Grace. My child will hopefully respect other people's traditions and it would be a learning experience for her. Attending Hannakah, Eid, Christmas and other celebrations with my friends didn't 'turn' me

So long as the visiting child was given the option to sit quietly and listen, I'd have no problem with it.

To quote Richard Dawkins-"Happy Christmas. Or, as we atheists say, Happy Christmas"

not upset at all, so long as the guest wasnt forced to join in.

Massive atheist myself and I wouldn't be offended. Your home, your way.

I wouldn't be upset, different families do different things and it teaches children to be respectful even if they don't take part. I'd explain briefly and just get on with it.

Oh I do like that Seeker!

As long as you don't sing.

"There's a lot of hysteria around people thinking their kids are going to be brainwashed because of any mild exposure to faith and it just doesn't happen."

No there isn't.

I would have no problem at all. There's no harm at all in children learning that people have different beliefs and traditions like this.

I would not be upset. (I'm an atheist)

You could always make it an inclusive grace, if you wanted, by thanking God and each other. Taking a moment to recognise and appreciate the bounty and beauty of the world (and your dinner!) is no bad thing for any person.

If you're going to practise a religion, then practise it. Don't shillyshally! Visitors to your home should respect the way you do things. It's a good lesson. God won't be offended because he doesn't exist. Sorry! Couldn't resist it.

I have christian friends who say grace if we are eating together at their house, I don't mind. I just sit quietly and its no problem. They don't say grace at our house or if we are in a restaurant though.

Go ahead. I don't think anyone would be offended. If you are really worried speak to his parents first and explain what you do. My parents always say grace before eating, I have no problem with it, but I'll confess to wondering why my father has to raise the volume of his voice by 10 decibels whenever we are in a restaurant!

If your child were to be invited for tea at a non-Christian household, I am sure you would not expect them to change their usual behaviour and say a prayer. Equally no need for you to change.

I think, once sat at the table, a simple "we say Grace before dinner, so you are welcome to join in if you wish" would suffice.

I was slightly taken aback when some visiting children paused for grace recently. Only in that they attend the same church as my children and we never do .

It is fine. Your house your rules.