WIBU to have entered in to a Loud Parenting stand-off at the library?

[welliesandpyjamas]

I think I know I WBU. In fact, I have brought shame on MN by stooping to these levels rather than just smirking and ignoring. I apologise.

I arrived early with DS2 to library rhymetime and was sitting reading quietly in the corner. Other mum comes in and announces to the whole place to her toddler that they will now sit and read. Cue LOUD reading of and over the top expressions and actions to the disinterested child. Very LOUD and ARTICULATED. And for some reason, I decided to out-loud-parent her and do the same, but going up one, by reading the bilingual books

In my defence, I did very quickly get a grip and stop.

She didn't, though. Went on for another 15 minutes and then was the loudest singer with the biggest actions during Rhymetime. Her dc did I mention his name was Zebediah? was more interested in making piles of books and picking his nose.

No4 son as I picked him up from school, and in front of at least a dozen other parents:
No4:I did literacy mummy
Me: ooo lovely darling, what did you write?
No4: I writed a swear word
Me:
No4: I writed DAMIT
Me: You spelled it wrong...
sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

these threads always make me think of what David Baddiel said about his mother, who if he was drowning in a lake would shout 'Help! Come quick! My son THE UNIVERSITY GRADUATE is drowning!'

Arf at these .

I writed damit is brilliant.
The f bomb from a pre-schoolers is a moment you don't recover from quickly.

I love performance patenting, there are a couple near here who do it regularly.

My son, when he was just three, upon dropping something declared "oh BOLLOCKS!" he used it in context (super genius is my boy) for the next two weeks approximately 30 hundred times a day.

I do sometimes wonder if people think I'm performance parenting because I'm always wittering to the baby. I do it because I like talking and you'd only hear me if you were stood next to us though.

oooh, Boffin i never knew it had a name! I'm so happy

"Big Ben is the bell that sounds the time of the clock in St Stephen's tower at the Palace of Westminster"
i can PP with pride now

You are guaranteed when I am doing LOUD PARENTING it's because I have had one of those days/nights where my children have been little fiends and I am determined to jolly them along, and will accept no arguments - we WILL have a good time - this WILL be a lovely learning experience - I WON'T break down in snotty tears because the damned child will not SLEEP! Usually when I want people to hear how lovely a parent I am it's because I am two inches from throttling the wee beggars... well, doing the angry monkey dance anyway.

That and I don't really come with any volume control. It's alright when you are in the library reading books to toddlers, try it when you are talking to receptionists at the doctors.

I blame having a half deaf first child, you have to do everything louder, and it sticks.

I believe Parliament used to be held in the Royal Chapel of St Stephen but it burnt down in the early 19th century, to be replaced with the two current buildings and St Stephen's Hall. Very interesting fact - the corridor between the two - the Committees Corridor, I think it's called - is supposed to be the longest corridor in Europe. I have been in it - it's fucking huge!

More here for superparent status

I bet someone writed damit when the old building burned down though.

I do a different kind of loud parenting at home.

I was once at the park with a friend and her daughter managed to open the gate to get out of the play equipment area. My friend stood up gasping in amazed wonderment and loudly exclaimed to everyone in the park "Did you see that? Did you SEE what she just did?" All these strangers looked at her like she was the mad woman she plainly is, and smothered their guffaws badly as their children who were two years younger did exactly the same thing. Friend's daughter was 4 years old, tallish for her age and with no gate-limiting conditions. I nearly died. Friend didn't notice - they just don't, do they?

creepyweebrackets thanks for the link. I am genuinely very pleased to have been put in my place learnt that. I had always thought disinterested was correct. So there you go, seems I don't actually knkow everything

maryz - that must drive you mad. Entertaining to a point, but to live next door, oh dear.

Pmsl provincialady!!!

Woman at the singing group on Weds annoyed the crap out of me. She's very performance parent. Her DD is clever for her age, though.

We had just cleared away the toys and started to sing. A ball fell out of the toy box and rolled a little way across the floor. DD saw and wanted to get it so I whispered in her ear 'ignore the ball darling, we're singing now' so she settled again. Five mins later, the PP child saw the ball and the mother, at the top of her voice, started with 'ooh yes! It's a ball! It's fallen out. She's so observant. Nothing gets passed her, she's just switched on all the time! Oh you want to get the ball? Go on then! She's so tidy, she loves tidying up, she's very helpful... Blahblah' Right in the middle of a song. Gah.

Mind you, I didn't have an audience, but I did do a bit of smug parenting the other day. I showed DD a picture and was Very Keen on her knowing what it was and understanding it. Poor child backed away from me looking a but scared and ran to the TV begging for Charlie and Lola

:o

Was with my French mum in a charity shop last week, and I said something to her like 'on s'en va, alors?' and the mum opposite suddenly looked up like she'd been stung and started talking French to her little boy...only she stumbled and couldn't keep it up and melted back into English...but I have to say, she had a very good accent!

I took the boys (after the pavement rolling epic performance failure) on a tour of the Houses of Parliament (as it was raining and I had promised them a day out). It was really interesting although DS2 couldn't understand why he wasn't allowed to sit on the benches in chambers because his legs were tired.

Love it

I took DS to a library sing a long thingy when he was 22 months and like taz on speed and not speaking English because until a week previously we'd lived abroad.

I loved DS a little more when some professional parent said loudly to me 'oh don't you and DS know these songs and actions'

DS looked up and said 'hola, mira la luz' (obsessed with lights).

She tried to redeem herself by asking if I was doing Dora too.

am currently feeding DD and have noticed that she's got a leaking nappy.
am trying my hardest not to say outloud "oh, dd you've got a dirty bum haven't you!" whilst wondering how long it's going to be before i can change it, because i can't put my hand on it and she's hanging off my boob without the hand support.

I don't speak to DS in French when we're out in public in case people think I'm doing it to show off - although his name should be a bit of a give away that it's not just loud parenting. And DH and I almost always speak French to each other, so it really is just with DS that I have this hang up.

Bloody loud parents ruining it for the rest of us

Definitely some Ostentatious Parenting stems from a very thin grip on one's sanity - especially the mum who is talking ten to the dozen in a high-pitched squeak in order to avert a tantrum in the Supermarket

But a lot more is just braying middle class people being show-offs

Though my mum does loud grandparenting with DS - and does try to speak French to him and the looks round to check if people have noticed. And it's not fecking impressive that he can point to his "nez", he hears French 50% of the time. He's even faster on the uptake if you ask him where his "zizi" is :o

She doesn't realise that even I'm stood there thinking "twat" when she does it :o

I think some parents of PFBs have absorbed the message that their children will never speak unless treated to a non-stop running commentary

I had one friend in particular that was a very loud parent; it was done in tandem with a smug look round to check that everyone was watching what a great parent she was, and the more people that joined in or passed comment, the better.

I stopped meeting up with her when she kept making digs all the time about my DCs and being quite rude. I'd say her kids were pretty average really, certainly nothing genius about them as she seemed to think...

oh my god!
just realised that i might look like one already!

years ago in French lessons at school, we learned heads shoulders knees and toes in french.
i used to do it a lot as a party piece.
i taught it to DD in the shop (i did the english version first and the french one made her laugh)
she's 12weeksold

Also I came across a very 'loud'parent at a soft play centre the other week and unfortunately she decided I'd like to hear her commentary and seemed to surgically attach herself to DS and I the whole time we were there. She spoke in a really cutesy, girly, playful voice to her DS, who spent the whole time picking his nose and kicking her, and decided to try and impress me with tales of what an earth mother she is, everything from her 4 homebirths to how Hugo, Eloise, Genevieve and Hector all far prefer her homemade humous to shop bought stuff.