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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to absolutely loathe the school run?

75 replies

lottielou39 · 08/03/2012 20:14

I know it's been done to death, but I'm really hating it right now. I've done it for 7 years so far and would rather do anything else in the world.
There are Mums not talking to each other, Mums gossiping about each others kids, a Mum I try hard to avoid because she gets involved in every tiny spat her angelic cherub gets involved in (and they are always best mates the next day after this woman has made a hugh drama over it), Mums who wave and smile one day, then walk past you to someone more interesting the next day. I've tried getting there early to chat to people, getting there at the very last second so I can just collect and run... and it never gets better. I fucking hate it.

OP posts:

ladywithnomanors · 08/03/2012 20:51

My DS has been to 3 primary schools now and this is the only one that has been like this. The other 2 have been pretty much as you describe.
I think I'm lucky in that the school is small and everyone lives very close together so socialising is easy.

ShotgunNotDoingThePans · 08/03/2012 20:53

I'm in my 12th and final year.
I'll be glad when it's over, but still a bit sad that I won't take any long-term friendships with me, so will only see people when I bump into them just like now.
Moving schools a few times hasn't helped nor the fact that I don't seem to be The One people want to talk to, and give up easily when rebuffed - plus I'm quite shy and awkward.

theDevilHasTheBestMNNames · 08/03/2012 20:53

I loved it with my first - pre-school and reception other parents were very friendly and chatty.

When DS started his cohorts parents were very catty, cliquey unfriendly which was a bit of a shock. There are some friendlier one but as with DD1 cohort that seems to get less and the DCs get older.

TBH with two and third DC nearly there I just want to drop and pick up as quickly and with as little drama as possible.

On plus side come September 7 years of toddler groups will be done with . I'm starting to think I might actually miss those so maybe school drops and pick ups will be same?

MariaFormosa · 08/03/2012 20:54

YANBU - the horror, the horror ... well, OK, maybe it's not that bad, but it is pretty gruesome (have been doing it 3 - 4 yewars, so am relative rooky).

There is one particular woman at my dc's school who is so hot and cold it's actually funny: one day greeting me by name, other times looking thru me ... WTF??! You do just have to let it wash over you, maybe get a laugh out of it if possible.

Rogerbacon · 08/03/2012 20:55

I enjoy taking the kids to school even more so that the nice weather is coming. I like nothing better to look at the sad little faces of all the motorists going to work while i will be at home enjoying the day not stuck in an office or factory doing a job I hate

TheOriginalSteamingNit · 08/03/2012 20:56

I must live in an alternative reality. I drop dd off and then I go away. I'll miss is next year. Sometimes other mums are there and I say hello,I don't know whether all of them like me or not.

I must be luckier than I knew!

PeanutButterChocolate · 08/03/2012 20:57

I love the school run! I'm very shy so the opportunity to chat for a few minutes and then beat a hasty retreat is just the right amount of socializing for me.

I do get anxious about the school gate dogs though. My Westie is good with 90% of dogs but on occasion she decides she doesn't like the look of a particular dog (large, hyperactive, black dogs are on her NO list) and I find it hugely embarrassing when she growls at them. She's a perfect angel in every other way but I spend a great deal of time worrying that someone might think she's vicious (she's not, she is just asserting her little-ness and doggy colour preferences )

theDevilHasTheBestMNNames · 08/03/2012 20:59

That is where I'm going wrong Rogerbacon- I'm too busy making sure I or any DC I have in tow - between 1 and 3 - are not run over by said crazy Kamikaze drivers.

PatFenis · 08/03/2012 20:59

I have just worked out that I have been doing the school run for 17 years and I still have another 6 to go!!

I have never got into any of the cliques/gossip groups although I am very aware that they exist. I have always been pleasant and friendly with other mums but once I have waved my DC's into school I have to dash to work which leaves no time for anything more than a cheery 'good morning' to anyone I come into contact with - so no school run angst for me

ledkr · 08/03/2012 21:04

At the end of my school run life i will have been doing it for most of my adult life.
The ones who only speak to me when it suits them I ignore totally.If you can say Hi everytime we pass then dont bother at all imo.
DDs junior school has a back entrance that not many use so it rules out the problem altogether.

VickityBoo · 08/03/2012 21:04

Urgh. I'm not a fan, my dd is only 3 and I've only been doing this for about 6 months at playgroup now we have another brewing so a loooong time of it ahead (although they'll probably have to get a bus after a certain time and none are within 6 miles!!)

JasperJohns · 08/03/2012 21:06

I have been doing playgroup/nursery/school run all at same place since 2000.

Everyone is very nice and friendly but I am officially bored of it.

Original poster

lottielou39 · 08/03/2012 21:08

thanks. Glad I'm not the only one. Middle daughter has just until the end of this term, then she's off to middle school (when I can eject her from car with her eldest sis, no standing in playground) and then I have to start it all over again from scratch in a few years when my youngest daughter starts preschool etc! Cannot wait.

OP posts:

Original poster

lottielou39 · 08/03/2012 21:08

but at least I get a few years off from July..... hurray.

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fuzzpig · 08/03/2012 21:15

I hate it too. Well, not the actual school run because I walk and chat with a couple of other mums. The actual waiting in the school playground is awful though, really really uncomfortable. I find it's worse in the afternoon.

Still, I'm going full time next month (DH still can't work at all) so will be doing either 1 or 3 school runs each week!

Original poster

lottielou39 · 08/03/2012 21:17

afternoons are definitely worse. Mornings, I've perfected the art of arriving on the bell. Just can't manage this in the afternoon.

OP posts:

maraisfrance · 08/03/2012 21:29

Too busy. Drop DS off at school then his father and I continue on the journey to work by train. My good mates are all in similar circumstances - working full-time, busy careers, paying the school fees...pick up lad from after school clubs at around 5 most days, no hanging about school playground hoping Queen Bee will notice. Work! it's a gift!!

Original poster

lottielou39 · 08/03/2012 21:32

am on maternity leave though, so can't avoid it! Gosh I was so optimistic and hopeful when I started doing school runs back in 2004...

OP posts:

BrownBoobBear · 08/03/2012 21:35

I wonder if any of us are doing the same school run?!

MotherOfSuburbia · 08/03/2012 21:38

On my 6th year here and I love it! I'm lucky to have made some great friends and it's nice to check in every morning and afternoon as well as getting the odd cheeky coffee in before the daily grind continues. However, I do lead a pretty boring life so this is probably the highlight of my social life!

AtAmber · 08/03/2012 21:42

Ohhh. Ds1 is 25, ds3 is in reception. I've been doing the school run for 21 years so far. Another 6 years to go. Thanks very much lottielou, am quite depressed now!

Moln · 08/03/2012 21:43

I have no issue with the morning at all, Arrive say hello to whoever I know, chat to the person I end up standing near etc etc

afternoon is a different matter DS2 finishes at 1.30 and then he and I have to hang about for an hour untill 2.30 when DS2 finishes.

i can cope with it when it's dry and not cold. However it does seem to be cold and raining a lot between 1.30-2.30....

PeanutButterChocolate · 08/03/2012 21:44

Too busy, Mara Walking the children to school then going for a run, walking the dog, taking care of everything that the family needs, volunteering, gardening, reading. My mates are all in similar circumstances...pick up the kids from school at 3:00 and then supervising homework/running them to activities until relaxing family time after dinner. No commuting, shuffling papers around or after-school clubs. Stay at home! It's a gift!!

fuzzpig · 08/03/2012 21:46

I feel really sorry for DD's old teacher. When she was still working there were a couple of mums (well actually a mum and a childminder) who would block the door every single day finding something to discuss with her. Morning and afternoon, every day. Now the teacher is on maternity leave and finally able to enjoy normal school runs with her own DD, and still she gets the same 2 talking the ears off her twice a day! She is too lovely to say anything but you can virtually see her heart sink when they approach.

theoldtrout01876 · 09/03/2012 00:14

We dont have the school run,thank god :o. The school bus comes picks the little darlings up and off they go, America is good at some things :o. I am so not into talking to the neighborhood mummies I even managed to get the bus driver ( used my celtic charm :o) to drop Dd2 off at the end of my driveway so I dont have to go hang with the coven other mums at the bus pick up point :o

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