Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To give the money back for my mauled dog's vet bill?

94 replies

Hullygully · 07/03/2012 09:40

About three weeks ago my dog was set on by an Akita that had slipped its lead and a Rottweiler, that was on a lead, but managed to get to my dog while the owner was pulling the Akita off.

My dog had four puncture wounds and needed staples, antibiotics and painkillers.

The man was apologetic and offered to pay the vet bill, I screamed at him that the dogs should be securely on leads and be muzzled, got his number, but didn't manage to save it on my phone.

My dog was extremely traumatised for a week or so (we had to cancel a holiday), but is ok now, just responds more aggressively to any aggression shown.

I went to the police because I wanted the man to take it seriously and muzzle the dogs. A very nice policeman went to see him (I had found out where he lived), and then came to see me. He told the man the dogs had to be controlled.

I put a copy of the vet bill through his door, plus a letter asking him to PLEASE take it seriously and harness and muzzle the dogs. He turned up on my doorstep and gave me cash, and said he was sorry and loved dogs. I said, you are going to muzzle them, aren't you? And he said the police had said it wasn't necessary, and that he had a more secure collar...He also said the dog had attacked two other dogs before.

I was so stunned I just said, well, I think you are being very irresponsible etc.

He left. Now I want to go and put the money back through his door as it feels like he thinks he's bought his way out of his responsibility.

I am so enraged.

OP posts:
Hullygully · 07/03/2012 09:43

And dh doesn't want to give the money back.

But I do. Blood money.

OP posts:
altinkum · 07/03/2012 09:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LilacWaltz · 07/03/2012 09:45

Use the money to buy a muzzle, and post it through his door?

Hullygully · 07/03/2012 09:46

altinkum - because he thinks his dog did wrong, he paid, the end.

It isn't the end, not while the dogs are dangerous.

I thought of that, lilac.

OP posts:
lumpymash · 07/03/2012 09:47

I wouldn't gve the money back.

Can you call back the officers who saw him to confirm if that's actually what they said? Tell them he admitted two previous attacks also.
Hope your dog is ok :(

LilacWaltz · 07/03/2012 09:48

Are Akita dogs not banned?

Hullygully · 07/03/2012 09:49

no they're not

the only other Akita I know chewed a child's face off.

OP posts:
altinkum · 07/03/2012 09:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Shutupanddrive · 07/03/2012 09:50

What would giving the money back solve? You asked him to pay the bill and he paid. I can't believe it's attacked two other dogs as well as yours, and he still won't muzzle it! That is very irresponsible and stupid. Not sure what else you can do though

Hullygully · 07/03/2012 09:51

Doesn't anyone think it's like blood money?

And I didn't ask him to pay, he wanted to. I didn't want to take it, dh did.

OP posts:
Chopstheduck · 07/03/2012 09:53

I agree with lumpmash, find it hard to believe that the police didn't tell him to muzzle the dog.

Can you ask around, find out the other dogs the akita has gone for, get them to report it to the police too?

Keep the money, and work on the muzzling.

cocolepew · 07/03/2012 09:53

It's not blood money. It was his responsibilty to pay for the damage his dog did to yours.

Keep it.

altinkum · 07/03/2012 09:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chopstheduck · 07/03/2012 09:54

it's not blood money, it's compensation to meet the expense that he is legally liable for due to his negligence in not controlling his dog.

randommoment · 07/03/2012 09:55

Keep the money, and see if you can find out more precisely what your nice policeman said to him, also check the nice policeman knows about the two previous attacks Akita man mentioned.
Glad Hullydog is better, hope he has no permanent psychological damage.

LaCoccinelle · 07/03/2012 09:55

If you give the money back will he muzzle his dogs? At least if you keep it you get your vet bills paid.

It's good that the police did something about it, so often you hear that they're just not interested in dog-on-dog attacks.

eurochick · 07/03/2012 09:56

I think he reasonably interpreted you putting the bill through the door as asking you to pay, and he did.

sleepsforwimps2010 · 07/03/2012 09:58

did you also report him to the council? that should prompt a visit from the dog warden, they will also speak to him and it will mean his dogs will be 'known' to them.
its upsetting and unfair but these incidents usually arent taken further unless a person is injured.
I would however suggest to speak to your vet about a behaviour referal for your dog, as a victim they often develop nervous agressive traits which a behaviourist should be able to help with.
then bill the other owner! so he appreciates his responsibility doesnt end with the stitches....

Hullygully · 07/03/2012 09:58

yy eurochick, but now I want to give it back.

OP posts:
LadyClariceCannockMonty · 07/03/2012 10:03

I think you ought to keep the money, out of pragmatism, but go back to the police and tell them about the previous attacks and query whether they really think it's OK that he doesn't muzzle them. Also talk to the council.

TBH I think you're getting in a rather abstract moral tangle going down the 'blood money' route. Practical, sensible steps are the way forward IMO.

Pagwatch · 07/03/2012 10:03

I can understand why you feel like that and why you want to go and shove the money up his arse give it back.
But I honestly think you are judging him too well.
You think he feels he has absolved himself because he has paid.
I think he feels he has absolved himself because he felt a bit bad.

If you give the money back he will not feel ashamed. He won't feel worse. He will feel quids in.

It is fucking outrageous that he won't muzzle them. But is the money maybe just the symbol of your frustration?
Find something positive to do with it. Could you get some help from a doggy behaviouralist/trainer to help with Hullydogs anxiety? Or give it to a rescue centre if you don't want it. I suspect if you give it bavk he still will not muzzle and in a while you will be even more upset.

I would also photograph him with his dogs unmuzzled and hand them into the police. Or make them into big posters and pin them up locally. I hate irresponsible dog owners. Poor hullydogs. How shit for all of you.

BupcakesandCunting · 07/03/2012 10:05

Keep the money, Hully.

I understand totally why you want to give it back to him but you won't make him see the error of his ways and muzzle his dogs by handing him his cash back. The only person that will lose out is you (financially). In fact, I think he probably said that about not muzzling to save face and I would think he will be muzzling if he thinks he might be putting his hand in his pocket every time his unwieldy mutt attacks another dog.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 07/03/2012 10:08

oh no, take it, it's the least he can do!

Are you sure the police would say it was OK to leave them unmuzzled if it had attacked two dogs before though?

Something tells me they don't know about that..i would maybe be having a word with them about it Wink

D0oinMeCleanin · 07/03/2012 10:08

Akitas are not banned. They are also wonderful dogs in the right hands.

He has bought a more secure collar? For an Akita? Confused If an Akita wants to get away, believe me they will, no matter how fucking secure the collars are. Akitas are massively strong dogs and this man does not deserve to own such a wonderful, intelligent breed of dog.

Reoprt him to the dog warden and the police again.

ChickensHaveNoLips · 07/03/2012 10:10

Don't give him the money back. He'll see it as you lessening the impact of his fuckwitted actions. Report the incident to the dog warden, and maybe contact the police officer again and ask if this chap was really told he didn't need to muzzle his aggressive dogs. Because that smells like bullshit to me. And the police officer may have some further advice to give you if there is anything else that can be done. I understand your rage. What's really fucked up is that at some point his dogs will do some serious damage, and probably end up destroyed. All for want of a muzzle and not having an arsehole as an owner