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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To give the money back for my mauled dog's vet bill?

94 replies

Hullygully · 07/03/2012 09:40

About three weeks ago my dog was set on by an Akita that had slipped its lead and a Rottweiler, that was on a lead, but managed to get to my dog while the owner was pulling the Akita off.

My dog had four puncture wounds and needed staples, antibiotics and painkillers.

The man was apologetic and offered to pay the vet bill, I screamed at him that the dogs should be securely on leads and be muzzled, got his number, but didn't manage to save it on my phone.

My dog was extremely traumatised for a week or so (we had to cancel a holiday), but is ok now, just responds more aggressively to any aggression shown.

I went to the police because I wanted the man to take it seriously and muzzle the dogs. A very nice policeman went to see him (I had found out where he lived), and then came to see me. He told the man the dogs had to be controlled.

I put a copy of the vet bill through his door, plus a letter asking him to PLEASE take it seriously and harness and muzzle the dogs. He turned up on my doorstep and gave me cash, and said he was sorry and loved dogs. I said, you are going to muzzle them, aren't you? And he said the police had said it wasn't necessary, and that he had a more secure collar...He also said the dog had attacked two other dogs before.

I was so stunned I just said, well, I think you are being very irresponsible etc.

He left. Now I want to go and put the money back through his door as it feels like he thinks he's bought his way out of his responsibility.

I am so enraged.

OP posts:

Original poster

Hullygully · 07/03/2012 12:29

Yes, it would be the same old headlines:

Child mauled by dog. Tragic case of dog that had already attacked 76 other dogs but wasn't muzzled because, er, well you know.

OP posts:

ChickensHaveNoLips · 07/03/2012 12:39

Marbles, that owner is a wanker of the highest order. It's common sense to have your dog on a short lead when approaching and passing other dogs. What a nobber

FlossieTeacakeShouldFakeIt · 07/03/2012 12:47

I think you are being odd.

You have no right to dictate that this man muzzles his dogs, you only hav ethe right to expect that he keeps them under control. He can keep them under control without a muzzle.

And what makes you think that he is going to muzzle them because you gave his money back?

He owes the money, so just keep it. I don't see how you think it's tainted, it's not like you are going to go and buy handbags with it then feel guilty because you got a Lucy item out of your dogs injury.

FlossieTeacakeShouldFakeIt · 07/03/2012 12:47

Lucy = luxury!

Original poster

Hullygully · 07/03/2012 12:52

thank you that is really helpful and insightful

OP posts:

notdrowningjustwaving · 07/03/2012 12:53

You could be the one writing the headlines, Hullygully. Raising the issue publicly, you will undoubtedly gain local support. It wouldn't surprise me if other, similar accounts come to the fore. It might shame similar minded dog owners into keeping their dogs under control; it might empower another person who's had an experience like you, but who's not been brave enough to do what you've done. It may even prompt the police to speak to this bloke again and actually do something by way of enforcement. It's a big ask on you, but it might make you feel like you've done something to wash the blood off your hands (to use your analogy).

Really sorry about your dog and the trauma you've been through too.

Original poster

Hullygully · 07/03/2012 12:54

I'm seriously thinking about it, notdrowning.

OP posts:

desperatenotstupid · 07/03/2012 12:57

But flossie, he blatantly cannot control his dogs without a muzzle, if that were the case poor HullyDog would not have been needing the surgery in the first place!

notdrowningjustwaving · 07/03/2012 13:05

All power to you if you do go ahead, Hully. If not, there's absolutely no shame on you, whatever you do with the money, and hopefully karma will bite this bloke on the arse one of these days (perhaps his dog might oblige).

porcamiseria · 07/03/2012 13:12

erm, what will giving the money back do? NOTHING
ffs dont do it!

NoMoreMarbles · 07/03/2012 13:13

flossie if this had been the dogs first 'offence' then maybe you would have a point,MAYBE. Seeing as how the man has failed to control his dog on 3 separate occasions then you have no valid point. hully feels he has not taken responsibility for his dogs behaviour and maybe being 'paid off' is not enough. A dangerous dog should be muzzled as that's the only way it would be unable to maul another dog WHEN the owner fails (in this case it is most definitely NOT an 'if')

shockers · 07/03/2012 13:20

The money is to pay your vet bill because you shouldn't have to (although you would because you are clearly a responsible dog owner).

I would be inclined to seek advice from the vet re muzzling of dangerous breeds/dogs who have attacked before, and then present your findings to the police.

I hope your dog makes a full recovery in body and mind.

thisisyesterday · 07/03/2012 13:22

hully i can totally understand why you don't want this dickhead's money, i wouldn't either

accepting it would be just confirming his stupid idea that you can just pay a vets bill and all is well.
i am not sure what else you can do tbh, but i don't think you are being unreasonable

WilsonFrickett · 07/03/2012 13:24

Don't give it back, but give it to the PDSA so it can help another dog owner who needs it, or a dog rehoming charity. I completely understand where you're coming from, so put the money to where it can do some good. Sorry about your dog.

fabwoman · 07/03/2012 14:32

I get the dirty money feeling. I got some money for something traumatic and it felt like tainted money and I just didn't want it. I didn't want to feel the bad thing that happened was worth it because I got some cash. Take the momey, pay it to the vet/back into your account or give it to a charity but don't feel it is a bad thing to take it. And follow up on this man as he clearly can't control his dogs and them being muzzled would stop them attacking another animal or a child when he hasn't kept them close to him.

Debsbear · 07/03/2012 15:29

I don't think ybu at all, and if you don't want the money - here is my address, lol!

Sluttybuttons · 08/03/2012 16:24

There is a large chance that he hasnt even paid it. You sent him the bill, so he could send it to his insurance company and they could refund him (minus excess). Thats if the dog is insured since thats part of what insurance is for. It wasnt given to you for a nice day out or to buy something nice with to stop you complaining about the dog, it was given to pay the vet bill that his dog caused.
Forget it was your dog for a minute and imagine it was your car. If somebody damaged it by being reckless then you would expect them to pay for the damage you wouldnt think they were paying you to keep quiet. If you give the money back you will be out of pocket for something, by law, he is responsible for. It wasnt a good will gesture it was paying what was owed LEAGALY

BuxomWenchOnAPony · 08/03/2012 16:32

He probably does think he's absolved himself and his dogs with the money, I totally get why you'd want to give it back. Like others have said though, I can't imagine it would prompt him to control or muzzle his dogs. Be worth a call to the dog warden/police - another visit might go some way to letting him know he's not done dealing with this yet.

frostyfingers · 08/03/2012 16:52

What a frightening experience for you. If you feel unable to keep the money, perhaps you could donate it to a dogs charity - unfortunately whether or not you give it back is obviously not going to make the slightest bit of difference to him - and at least that way it's going somewhere positive. I think you could try ringing the police again to find out for sure whether they said he didn't need to muzzle them - it sounds mad to me.

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