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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

its happened twice baby's names being changed, why do people change them?

50 replies

leelo · 28/02/2012 23:20

you spend 9mths growing a person thinking about names and choosing one that fits. so why do you change it? this has happened twice in the past couple of months. one child was 5mths when they changed his name and the other 4 weeks. no weird reasons that i know of just they changed it. it strikes me as a bit odd that you change this. after 4 weeks i can vaguely concede child doesn't know any different but after 5 mths, just strange anyone else aware of this or are my circle of mates weird? also both dc were dc2 in both cases.

OP posts:
D0G · 28/02/2012 23:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NoOnesGoingToEatYourEyes · 28/02/2012 23:39

I briefly considered adding a second middle name for our son, but in the end it felt wrong to change the name we had already given him.

I don't know anyone who has changed their child's name, but from what I have read people feel that they made the wrong choice usually because they have given into pressure to use a certain name but wish they hadn't or pressure to not use a name they loved but which is unpopular choice with their family, or they feel that having gotten to know their child after it is born they have chosen the wrong name altogether as it doesn't suit their baby's personality.

keepingupwiththejoneses · 28/02/2012 23:44

My cousin was called faye until she was 6 weeks old and then her parents changed it. They said that although they loved the name since they found out they where having a baby, she just didn't suit her. You have up until they are 6 weeks to register them anyway, and you can change a babies name up to their 1st birthday legally and get a new birth certificate if you can prove they have been known by that name for a period of time before their first birthday.
Sometimes the name someone like while PG turns out not to suit them or they end up not liking it.

AwkwardMary · 28/02/2012 23:46

I don't think it's odd...what I find odd is people who choose the name before the baby's out! How can you possibly know it's name before you've met it!?

Neither of our DDs had names before they were 2 weeks old...they were just "the baby" until we found the name that suited them.

AwkwardMary · 28/02/2012 23:48

I am going to give my DD2 a middle name...she's almost 4! She never got one officaly...but DD1 gave her one almost right away...we need to make it legal now.

BeckyBrandonNeeBloomwood · 28/02/2012 23:53

I would find it a bit odd if I had come to know a baby by a certain name then all of a sudden it was changed.
Only because it's not a regular occurrence and is a bit out of the ordinary. I would feel the same if an adult decided to change their name by deedpoll.
Having said that, surely it's better to change a baby's name at a few weeks/months old rather than giving them a name you will later regret, or they will hate and end up changing anyway!

Agree about naming babies before they are even here, I'm all for having ideas for names but it really grates on me when people refer to their bump as a child's name months before it is born. That's more weird IMO!

Tiddlyompompom · 29/02/2012 00:00

My name was changed when I was a month old, my mum kept leaning over the cot using the shortened version and just didn't like the sound of it. Realising that everyone would use the nickname once i started school, she changed it before the original stuck too much.
I was DD2, my second first name works better with my sisters name, and is much nicer, so thanks Mum!

CrunchyFrog · 29/02/2012 00:33

My second child was named before he was conceived, let alone born! Luckily it was perfect for him.

SleepingWithGhosts · 29/02/2012 00:38

I changed my daughters name although before registration.

When pregnant I picked what my immature 16 year old self saw as a cool and trendy name but when faced with my gorgeous newborn realised I couldn't saddle her with such a name and chose something classic instead.

LDNmummy · 29/02/2012 00:45

I also think it is odd to name a child before meeting it. It doesn't surprise me that parents who do that may end up changing the name much later after deciding it doesn't actually suit the baby.

We chose our DD's name before she was born as simply a name we liked, but were prepared to change it to something else if it didn't suit her and before registering her. Luckily the name suited. We will do the same with the next one.

Picking names you like is great, but to pick a name as definite before spending time with the baby could lead to feeling the need to change it later on. For that reason I don't think it is strange that people change their babies names in this way.

HerRoyalNotness · 29/02/2012 00:54

I had DS2 in Canada and they register the birth along with name in hospital before you go home, so woe if you have not already decided on a name!

startail · 29/02/2012 01:07

DD1 had been called 'fav. Great aunts middle name' ever since I found out what it was. Her fate was decided 18 years before she was born!

DD2s just sort of happened towards the end of PG. It was DHs turn (my mum and sister vetoed my choice, they really didn't like it) so he got free range. Everyone liked his choice so there was no problem.
(even if he choose her name because he fancied her name sake on TV)

UnlikelyAmazonian · 29/02/2012 01:12

I think there is often a last minute panic

there are so many options.

I met a friend/aquaintance/ today who has just called her new baby Dunlop as she baulked at posh wellies name a couple of days before.

I mean ffs Dunlop. I didn't say anything

flyingspaghettimonster · 29/02/2012 01:30

I wish i had changed ds2. I gave into pressure and nobody wanted me to name him my choice so i just let hubby pick anything off our list. I am sure if he had been given my choice name, the one i called him when pregnant, we would have bonded. I still don't think his name works with our family.

savoycabbage · 29/02/2012 03:01

I wish I had changed my dd's name and she's 5 now. I think people that do are brave. It will have taken them 5 months to get the nerve up to change it probably.

YABU.

Thumbwitch · 29/02/2012 03:32

A friend of mine did this - they had the name, it was gorgeous, everyone was calling the DD by the nn that went with it - but then someone mentioned it sounded like another name with a lisp. It doesn't if it's pronounced properly, but it could - so they changed it to the non-lisp version, which made a nonsense of the nn.

Trouble was, the DD already responded to her nn, and most people had got used to using it, so it stuck for some time....

She's now 9 and still responds to that nn, her real name, and another nn given her by her cousin! Versatile and flexible, and very good natured about it all. :)

TinyPants · 29/02/2012 05:21

I changed ds2's name after a few days, although he wasn't yet registered.

It just didn't suit him or sound right when we were talking about him. Luckily I love his new name and it fits him perfectly but we've kept the cards we received when he was born so at some point I expect we'll have to explain who Charlie is...

RealLifeIsForWimps · 29/02/2012 05:32

I reckon I could change DS's (18mo) name now and he wouldnt notice......or at least he pays not the slightest bit of attention to it. The cat is more responsive than him Grin

Groovee · 29/02/2012 06:39

Family member's baby was to be named one thing but when she was born, dad announced he didn't feel she suited the name, so they changed the first name and kept the middle name.

DriverDan · 29/02/2012 08:36

I changed my baby's name. It's hard to explain why really but it just didn't suit her and I was getting really upset at the prospect of having to use it for the rest of my life. It seemed more strange to continue using a name I didn't like just so people wouldn't think I was 'strange'. DD was nearly 5 months but had no idea what her name was before, also we had started using the new name for about a month but took us that long to sort it officially. Luckily friends and family were very supportive and everyone took to the new name, including her sister. I am very glad I did it and haven't regretted the decision once!

Mrsjay · 29/02/2012 08:40

I nearly registered the name i liked BUt dd1 wasnt named it Blush Dh said erm no her name is X I think its better to change a name than a child to grow up with a name that parents hate and regret and its not as if baby knows ,

My cousin had her baby names since she was 12 she had 2 girls to boys , she has recently had twin girls and used the names I think its quite nice if you have names you love then use them ,

feelingfaraway · 29/02/2012 08:55

My DS has a name from his father's culture, and we were going to raise him in his father's country, but now, as it looks increasingly likely that I'll be raising him alone in this country I am finding that I wish we had chosen a more 'normal' name... When we were all together, I didn't have any qualms about calling out funnyforeignbabyname, but now I'm not quite so comfortable doing it alone...

Bunbaker · 29/02/2012 09:08

"what I find odd is people who choose the name before the baby's out!"

I don't. I find it odd that people have had 9 months to think of a name or a short list of names and then call their new addition to the family "baby" for several weeks because they can't think of a name.

MIL had a name in mind for OH but when she heard how it was pronounced locally (she lives in Northumberland) she changed her mind.

scaryteacher · 29/02/2012 09:14

I was so convinced I was having a girl that the baby was Chloe all through my pregnancy. Had to change it pretty rapidly when I had a very late scan at about 33 weeks, as I was told I was having a boy.

Don't think Chloe would have suited my now 16 yo ds!

Almanzo · 29/02/2012 09:15

I was Anne for a few weeks until my parents decided it didnt sound right. As our surname started with a vowel so made me sound like An Object!
My friend has three boys and was married to a muslim guy whose parents were very keen they were given muslim names so thats what they had, but when they divorced she changed them all to christian type names. E.g Dawwod became David.
Her ex didn't mind though, said it would be easier for them living in the Uk.