To just want a sodding cup of tea?!

[scentednappyhag]

DH offers me a cuppa, then sits down at pc and starts playing some shit a game. I wait 20 mins, no tea forthcoming, so get up to make it myself. DH immediately jumps up, blocks my way to the kitchen and steers me back to the sofa to a chorus of, 'I'll make it, I said I'd make it!'
Repeat two/three times for every cup of bastard tea every bastard weekend.
AIBU to buy and hide my own fecking kettle to avoid having to be oh-so-grateful that he's saved me the time and effort of making it myself in the first place?

Oh my dh does that too
Very annoying

I had to kick my DH out of bed this morning, bastard. I keep reminding him that the morning tea is in his contract.

Why don't you just say "no thanks" when he offers?

I don't get the fuss people make about hot drinks, mostly cos I think they taste minging.

I also want a cup of tea! I am on bed rest after a massive blood clot (I'm pregnant). I just want a cup of tea. A cup of run-of-the-mill English builders tea. And no-one here can make me one.

Well next time he offers just say yes I do but only if you are actually going to make it now and not in twenty minutes like you usually do. Have you tried pointing this out to him ?

My DH does this, too. You can't say "no thanks", unlurked, because then you can't make the tea yourself without the injured cries of "I offered you one a minute ago!".

I'm sure DH is convinced in his head that he has made one. He always makes a morning cup of tea but the rest of his offers are very hit and miss!

Anyone else remember Billy Connolly saying the most sexist thing he ever heard was when he asked his Grandad how many sugars he took in his tea and he replied "Ask your Granny."?!

Actually, my DH does something similar. He will disappear in the middle of making breakfast "for a poo".

Hope he washes his hands Blx

Ooh, DH does this to. Same with lots of things. Often he will say he is putting DS to bed, then piss about on the laptop for 45 minutes by which time DS has gone from tired and compliant to overtired and running about like a loon, then he wonders why it takes him over an hour to get him to sleep.

So why can't you just say that you wanted to make it yourself or you wanted it now rather than later? I don't get it! It's op's husband not the queen, why can't she just tell him without fear of offending?!

Well he does, but I invariably end up finishing whatever it was he started in the kitchen.

Unlurked and Chub- I have pointed out that if I accept an offer of tea it's because I'd like one now, and am more than happy to make it myself if he's not ready yet, but unfortunately this is forgotten by the next time he offers. I fully accept it would be easier just to sneak into the kitchen and quietly make it myself in the first place, but ninja moves on a Sunday morning aren't always practical

tell him you do not like tea how he makes it, so you would rather do it yourself

Get a sandtimer. If he hasn't made you one within 5 minutes, make it yourself.
Explain what you are doing and why, and for some reason he'll feel he's in a competition against the timer and you'll get your tea.
Or alternatively, you can throw the sandtimer at him and yell 'You are such a useless bastard, full of piss and wind. WHERE'S MY SODDING TEA?'

Get a teasmaid. They are effing brilliant. I don't care if it makes me middle aged and naff but I blardy love ours. Press a button, tea 5 mins later. By-pass useless DHs everywhere .

i think some people think the offer is the main objective. So once the offer is made they feel good about themselves, so don't actually need to follow through with the actual boring task of actually doing it.

DP does this and i end up making things eventually. The next day when i say it's his turn as i did dinner/teas/breakfast, he looks incredulously at me and says indignantly 'but i did it yesterday'. He will then argue black is white that he did in fact do it. I think he genuinely believes it too. He thinks back and distinctly remembers saying 'i'll cook' and all the rest is white noise or a muzak version of the girl from ipenema! So he must have done it.

Dust- I will be trying out both of these suggestions this afternoon and I'm very much looking forward to the second

Instead of getting up to do it why don´t you just shout "Oi! where´s my tea"? remind him?

Oh. I do that to DH all the time...

DH boils the kettle, puts the teabag in the cup, then wanders off. And says he made the tea. Then I have lost vital cooling time, the bastard, so hard to catch it very hot but not burny.

40not: I have no idea what a teamaid is but it made me think of some emergency tea service who deliver in maid outfits

Alternatively, you could sit behind him repeating tea in a mystical voice to see if he gets a hint from a higher being?

I also like Dust's suggestions

Confusedpixie a Teasmaid is a machine that makes tea for you. Not sure about modern ones, but back in the days you could set it on a timer like an alarm clock & wake up to a steaming cuppa of an excuse for tea, so a VERY popular thing to have in a bedroom.

As someone brought up in a house where even teabags were banned (BLEND the tea in the pot to the correct proportions only) Teasmaids were classed as machines of the devil

A teasmaid is an angel from heaven. And ours is at the side of our bed and wakes us up with a cup of tea. It also has a reading light and rather bright clock. My parents have had one for years and we bought MIL one this Christmas. I jest not when I say i take it on holiday with us

Drinking tea really does seem like an awful lot of hard work. We just don't drink tea or coffee in my house. We don't offer to get each other drinks, everyone has free access to the tap. No arguments. No egg timers. I think you should all give up your hot drink addiction