to think that it is possible to control the loudness of your coughing?

[YuleingFanjo]

like you can with sneezing. As in with sneezing you can either go "AAAAAAAACHHHOOOOOOO!" or you can do that quiet internal kind of sneeze when you know one is coming.

DH is in the room below where the baby is sleeping and I asked him to try to cough more quietly as he's been coughing really loudly for days and it's a massive pain having to go and feed a baby back to sleep several times an evening.

DH thinks it's not possible to have quieter coughs and seems to think I am being an arse .

I've been ill all week with fever, flu symptoms, and horrible constant cough. I insisted on staying downstairs a couple nights (and probably will tonight as well) because the coughing is so frequent and loud, and I simply cannot control it. This way DH & our two little ones won't have to hear it so much upstairs and can get their sleep.

DH isn't actually pleased with this solution, as he doesn't want me to have to be downstairs, but honestly, I'm miserable upstairs or downstairs, so might as well not be keeping everyone else awake as well.

I'd have been quite upset if DH was making a fuss over the amount of "noise" made by the coughing I had no control over. I feel badly enough that he missed two days of work staying home with the boys as I was too ill to care for them. He wasn't too fussed over it - as he rightly says, it's his job to take care of the boys as well.

yes, I do realise i was in the wrong. Have apologised to DH.

apologies to all those I have offended also.

I think YABU. I can't really control the loudness of either sneezes or coughs. When I had pneumonia I had an awful cough for several days. DH actually went and slept in another room for some parts of the night as a result. I did offer but DH knew I was ill - before the pneumonia was dx - and insisted I stayed in the comfy bed. But I couldn't control it in any way shape or form. It isn't something you do for fun generally! I'd have done anything to be able to control it.

Yuleing Fanjo You don't need to apologise to anyone here! Stop that meekness at once!

Boomerwang is right, you don't need to apologise. I didn't even think your OP was entirely serious, but even if it was you have the mitigating circumstances of the baby being woken.

Just before we had DS one of the midwives commented that anyone who woke our sleeping child should face 15 years in prison. We laughed politely. Two weeks later we understood completely and would have voted that midwife in for Prime Minister if she promised to make that a law.