to put the children in economy while DH and I fly business class?

[OfCourseIveNameChangedForThis]

Testing name change.

OP - working part-time, doing lots of housework and looking after the home sounds like hard work to me!

Sat there, reading, listening to an Ipod etc is being a family - your husband's job isn't just to waltz in for the good bits! It's all the mundane shit too (which no doubt you do all day, week in, week out).

Well thank you everyone for the input (and the flaming).

I'm afraid I need to leave the thread and get on with some other stuff now.
It's been interesting to say the least.

Fly premium economy, come back a day earlier so H doesn't have to go to work the next day.

Your (H's) idea seems pretty unreasonable to me.

Why don't you look up seats on a private plane? They've got these special websites now set up so if a plane if flying empty back from somewhere they can sell the seats at an affordable price to make up for some of the cost. I believe they can work out not much more expensive than economy.

That way your DH can have the flying experience befitting a snobbish twat, whilst no one else has to put up with your unsupervised brats. Everyone's a winner. Bingo.

sat there, reading, listening to an Ipod etc is being a family - your husband's job isn't just to waltz in for the good bits! It's all the mundane shit too (which no doubt you do all day, week in, week out).

That's a very good point imo.

YABU! How mean.

GetOrf, but to be honest, there is some kind of hierarchy.

It is there in many aspects -e.g., the parents bedroom is called the master bedroom and is larger than the other bedrooms. Parents usually get the better mobile phones. When your kids are of drinking age, you don't just open your wine cellar to them and let them have your 1997 Grand Reserva or you 25 year old special malt. Nor do you buy your children mulberry handbags or Burberry coats. And you might buy a nice BMW for yourself but only get a second hand ford fiesta for your child.

The point is adults do treat themselves to things which they may not do for their children. I don't see why a 12 year old needs to fly business class. She hasn't earned it, while the parents have, because they go to work, take care of their families and have responsibilities that comes with being an adult. And so why should they not get some of the pleasures too

thanks for the explanantion, margot.

surely that depends on how values are instilled, though?

my dc travel business class (with dh and me - we are not in first! ). they are only little , and one is disabled, so having them in another cabin is not feasible (but would not choose to do so anyway).

but I will be horrified if they grow up to be over-entitled teens/adults who cannot manage on their own budget.

I don't necessarily see how not letting them sit more comfortably on an aeroplane would teach them these values, tbh. you can sit in the comfortable seats and appreciate that you are lucky to be able to do so.

thanks squeakytoy. My mother is another adult. My children are children. We are very much not the same and I don't think anyone treats their children exactly the same way as they treat adults do they?

This thread is both sides of the first world's problem right now. 1) Should we all travel business class together or lump it in premium economy? and 2) Children have a right to expect XYZ and they cannot be expected to slum it.

They seriously don't bicker. They're not perfect, but they don't bicker

And I suppose your jobbies don't smell either.

I'm in the minority of people who really do not see this as a big deal. The idea that a 10 and especially a 13 year old need some sort of supervision on a flight and that other passengers will have to look after them, is ridiculous! They are going to watch movies and eat the whole time, just like the rest of us! Just shows how much we mollycoddle children these days.

Hey, the parents did it in Home Alone (Of course they also forgot a child at home...)

The thing is that this is not a decision which is simply being made for the parents or for the children. It is being made for whoever will have to sit next to the children whilst their parents are being pampered in business class.

That is what I find unacceptable.

I fly cattle class and got well pissed off with my dhs ability to switch off to his kids when sitting next to us on a long haul flight!

I would not want any other passenger to feel responsible for my kids while I lorded it. I would feel uncomfortable and could not do this.

OP here is the thing: do you remember being a child?

Did you like the sort of child who flew business class on holiday and admire their sophistication, or did you think they were pampered and and show offy? Were your friends the sort of child who happily buggered off to economy, thrilled to be travelling at all, especially alone, relished the challenge of pulling off some kind of extra-pop related scam and finished 10 books (read 9, wrote one?)

I don't really agree that pwecious husband should get to call the shots on this but on the other hand the outrage at children not being treated the same as adults makes me uneasy. I think you should book yourself into 1st and the rest economy. Don't let them come and talk to you. Tell the stewardesses that you don't know them, they are dangerous weirdos stalking you, and they should not be allowed near you.

Dh works 12 hours shifts, 12 days on, then 2 days off. He works hard. He is tired.

But he will be using all of his holiday entitlement on the odd day here and there when dd3 is in hospital (regularly). We won't be going away together, and even if we were, it would be camping in the UK. Again.

So, in answer to your OP, your dh has come across as feeble, claiming that flying in economy will tire him out. In the grand scheme of things, it is a ridiculously petty 'problem'. It's a complete non-issue, just fly toether with your children and thank your lucky stars you have the chance to do so.

"I think you are a bit mean if you begrudge answering a couple of questions for the person next to you durig a 12hr flight."

I don't and wouldn't begrudge answering a couple of questions during a 12 hour flight. But I'd prefer not to be put in the position of answering them on behalf of parents who'd chosen to sit apart from their children. There's a difference.

I recall the one and only time me and the dcs went on a package tour. We were told that there was no way we could sit together on the flight out and that was OK. But I did say that they needn't sit me with anyone else's children if I'd been denied the chance to sit with mine.

Yes you have a point there flatbread - there is a reason why I won't let dd borrow my French Connection jeans, she can stick to her New Look ones (she can buy French Connection jeans when she earns and pays for them).

I think it is different with this flight thing though. It does seem very selfish f the OP's husband, for some reason.

thisisanickname: not a good analogy. I would expect the dh to ensure all the family had comfortable seats in the new car, though.

I would not contemplate buying a car which my dc did not fit into with reasonable comfort, while loafing about in luxury upfront.

i don't see a safety issue here at all. you can pop back and check up on them.

i would find it a bit cringeworthy to be 'denying' the kids while we lived in the lap of luxury sipping champagne. but actually when you think about it - it's a flight. a few hours. the kids will be more than happy playing games and watching movies. they won't want champagne and fancy food. and they don't need the legroom.

so.

YANBU

Yes Marvin I completely agree. My children are utterly privileged, by the way! I don't stick to my values as much as I talk about them . I just want them to know how lucky they are and maybe that is impossible because none of us realise how lucky we are until we are forced to go and stand in a refugee camp in the Sudan and then we suddenly get a grip on ourselves.

Hope this doesn't sound sanctimonious, by the way. I am nowhere near to solving this issue for myself. My daughter told me she thinks its BORING when family buy her clothes for birthday presents. We had the talk about being lucky and grateful but of course it doesn't register and she's only 5 so perhaps I'm asking too much.

I don't mollycoddle my children. However, if something unexpected crops up I am the one who needs to deal with it, not some unidentified person elsewhere, because I am the parent.

I have been next to 10 and 12 year olds on flights and I really like it They take less space, are generally courteous and mostly keep to themselves instead of engaging in useless chit-chat

Assuming this isn't a wind up, I think they are too young, fine from 14-16 years. If your DH needs his sleep he can go business whilst you sit with the kids.

marvinthemartian: but would they all have the same features as the seats in the front? probably not. Seats in the front usually come with adjustments and heating controls and all sorts of fancy gadgets. Seats in the back usually just come with a seatbelt.

But I disagree that it's not a good analogy. It's about buying a luxury for yourself and whether or not you children necessarily have a right to it.

Sorry if this has been covered but haven't read the woke thread. What does dh do for a living? Is he a brain surgeon? Air traffic controller? Get a grip man. Boo hoo, it's one nights broken sleep.