to be pissed off with being offered a council FLAT instead of a HOUSE?

[OMFFG]

We have 4 DCs, youngest 16 months and they think this is suitable!! The flat is 3 bedrooms and on the 2nd floor of a small tower block and has balconies which I would be pretty worried one of the DCs may fall out of.

This is my worst frigging nightmare. We have been 'homeless' for almost 2 years and the council have housed us in temporary accommodation (private rented) which we have to pay market value for (£875 per month) even though we did not choose it and it's a complete shit hole. We could not leave as we would lose our priority on the council bidding list. We lost our house when DH was made redundant and could not afford to pay £1200+ to privately rent.

Now after all this they have offered us a fucking flat. I am furious because every week until last week, there were only offering 3 bed houses but we would always be 3/4 on the list. Now that a flat was offered, less people have bid on it so we got to the top of the list. I did not even bid on it, the council did. Apparently they can bid on 'our behalf' as we are homeless and if we refuse this flat, we will be taken off the housing list. How the hell will we cope in a flat???

The rent is 'only' £380 a month but a house would only be £20 a month more.

AIBU to tell them to stuff it up their arses?

Yes, OP could be in the Daily Mail looking really SAD and pointing at the flat.

And you definitely have to be London based?

If There aren't enough houses to go round, presumably some people have to get flats? Simple supply and demand.

FWIW, someone I know was housed in a high rise 3 bed flat (10th or 11th floor I think from memory, definitely double figures) when they were a parent of 2. They then had 2 more children, but it took about 8 years for a house to come up and for them to be rehoused. They could have rented privately of course BUT due to their financial circs, they preferred the security of a council tenancy, so they put up with it. That's the choice isn't it - rent privately for more money and less security, and choose where you live, or take what the council can offer?

OK, heres the bottom line.

I bet if the OP had been all worried and upset and not quite so ranty she would have got more empathy. Try and look past how she wording it to what she is saying.

I actually lived in a privately rented house, landlord not selling but put myself on the housing list (LP, 1 DS) because I knew by the time a place became available things could have changed. I was told the waiting list was 2+ years and I was band 1.

I only bid on places which I knew/ thought were nice in areas I wanted to live in. I mainly bid on houses but also bid on ground floor flats where there was a garden.

Somehow 14 months after being on the list I was contacted and offered a 2 bed new build flat (in a street still being built!) I was shown to my flat - on the first floor. I had bid ground. At first I was disappointed - flat is spacious and lovely though. Then I met my downstairs neighbour 2ad + 1ch ( who is 7 weeks younger than DS). I have had moments of stupid rage over the years that they will not let their DD play outside alone in the garden, keep the patio open for her to free flow, as I have had to supervise DS outside because of stairs and door. I was mainly annoyed because I was told to take the flat or be kicked off the list (despite the fact it wasn't the flat I bid on). However also moments of 'how the fuck did I get it' when the family downstairs were band 0, on the list longer and the other downstairs neighbour was paid to move there from a 3 bed house. (SO how did we all get to the top of the list at the same time? )

Not being able to provide your own housing for a child is scary, it's a lot of pressure. I suspect the OP is actually grieving for the life she wanted to, and thought she could provide for her children. She has patiently waited for a property, bidding as she's told to on a property she wanted. SUDDENLY - she is being removed from temporary accomodation and put into a flat she wouldn't have chosen to live in but being told she doesn't have a choice. There goes the rug again. (the first time being her DH redundancy). Especially when she's paid her own rent on the temporary accomodation and will be on the new accomodation.

Wouldn't anyone here feel slighty agreived that a family of 3 was living in a 3 bed house paid for by HB and you were in a flat that you didn't chose and paying for it yourself.

I'm not saying the OP's language etc is acceptable, but rather understandable. It is a damn shame that everyone who needs social housing doesn't get it but if you allow choice then everyone should get the choice, not just those who are lucky enough.

Does sound to me from the OP's last post that she is having to move RIGHT NOW due to letting agent/ landlord problems which she hasn't created.

I wouldn't want a ground floor as you tend to get burgled. Second floor is nice and safe.

I do think the OP is being unreasonable and her attitude is appalling (there are rants and then there is complete unreasonableness), but the lack of sympathy is awful.

However, the 'contraception' comments and a few pages back, the 'pity your children' comment is just sickening. You may not like the OP's attitude or her posts - I dont like them either, but bringing her children into it is just not on.

Naively, i thought better of Mumsnet.

Yeah but she is able to provide a home for her children. That's not good enough either. She wants all boxes ticked. Cheap rent. Enough rooms. And outside space. Shame isn't it.

Much as I dislike OP's attitude I dont think comments about how man kids she has are ok.
Didnt she say she was pg when her OH was made redundant?

I am a bit puzzled over the rent thing though.

Why take a crappy council flat if you can afford to rent a decent private let? I know loads of people who chose to rent private so they get a choice.

I am not familar with this bidding thing. I got given once choice and if I had turned it down I would have been taken off the housing list. I was lucky and got a nice flat. But tbh I think it was the very sort of flat that the OP is so furious about (cept mine was two bed and on the 3rd floor)

I am still baffled as to how you know those particular houses were better than the flat.

And how you know that you would be housed in one and that would not always be 3rd or 4th in line.

And it seems obvious the council are in a hurry to rehome you. Or you will be truly homeless. Then I'd give you reason to f off in all directions.

Nobody said you were low life.
Entitled yes, but not low life. :-)

PS - btw, in my experience, and strangely, the councils help drive rents up in London. I was told I could expect XXXX in rent because that's the maximum the council pays. I am not letting to DSS, BTW.

DSS? Just so you know 60% of all renters in the UK get housing benefit. And the vast majority are working.

"Its those of us who grew up in council houses/flats and live in flats, council or not who are both being reasonable and having to put up with jibes about where we live and our opinions against the OP."

What is that supposed to mean? I did grow up in both a council house and a flat. My mum still lives in one.

Frankly, I think being told to fuck off is pretty tame considering what a lot of you have said about the OP and her children.

But you could argue social housing is a right. EVERYONE can apply for social housing. NOT everyone will be given the same priority because it's done on need and availability. (eg you could despertly need an adapted house and be top of the list but people will go above you because one is not available )

I agree with everything MrsDV has said on this thread.

And at all the angsty condemnation of 3 bed council flats with two balconies. One of my dd's closest friends at school lives in a 3 bed council flat with only one balcony, oh dear! the poor girl!!

Have you seen pictures of the flat that Adele grew up in?

Not everyone disagreeing with the OP is being nasty. I only said that it was a lot better than homelessness and I was and still am grateful for my flat. I had a similar choice to the OP.

you're right Hecuba But some people have been very nasty.

FWIW despite understanding why the OP feels the way she does I also agree she is going to have to suck it up as it's better than being homeless.

I know that not everyone is being nasty but a lot of people are and in a very horrible way, the lowest way actually, by telling her that she has no right to her children because she NOW can't afford to house them. Well, if only they gave out foresight with every pregnancy test...

I agree, the flat is better than homelessness. I think she should take it. Like I said earlier on, I don't like idiots saying crap like "beggars can't be choosers" (how condescending) and "Breed now, practicalities later." It's not on.

Bupcakes am glad to see you on this thread with the usual common sense. Its just not on to bring her children into it, whatever you think of her posts.

EauDeLaPoisson , its usualsuspect to you if you don't mind

As you were

Haven't read the whole thread because I know it will be full of 'be grateful, crap' OP if you get to read this, I would check out the council's housing policies, where I live they have a policy of only children aged 10+ to live in anything other then ground floor. I don't think it is a problem it being a flat but the second floor is not good. As for the people have said you should have taken contraception obviously can't add up.

bups thankyou, you just said what I was trying to say in about 100 lines less.

Yes she needs to get on with it , but she can have a rant surely

usualsuspect, yes, I thought that's what AIBU was all about, getting it off your chest.

Other posters rant and swear, call people they deal with in RL c*s, over much more trivial matters than this.

bibbity the flats that Adele grew up in are just down the road from me - from what I've seen they're actually rather nice (spacious and light) C4 news filmed an empty one that need a bit of a tidy and brush up. West Norwood is not a wasteland she's bravely dragged herself up from.

another thought OP....when i was growing up (in a council house) the council had to rehouse my 'mother' when i was too old to share with my brother.

is that still the case these days? if so then it would not be a long term thing anyway.

how bad is the flat in reality?
I would view it first.

i think it would be better if there was a time limit on having a council house or flat. I always thought the idea was to get on your feet. i personally dont feel its right for some people to sit on their council house forever, paying subsidised rent and no property maintenance while others scrimp and save for similar. Similar with benefits. In my 40 years we had to claim once, when my DH was made redundant, we lost everything and like i said, moved in with his parents, we did not get any help with anything other than his JSA, and he got a job within weeks of the claim. We were laughed out of the council offices when we tried to get on the council house list.

i can understand why you are pissed off OP, but try and chill - view it first. you dont have to take it if you really cant bring yourself to live there.

the quips about contraception are just vile and needless.