To think this friend is a dick

[MilkNoSugarAndAShotofWhisky]

We have a mutual friend, this mutual friend is 20w pg with dc4 ..sadly they've just found out that baby has various problems that are most likely "incompatible with life" they're having further tests but it doesn't look good

DickFriend, on hearing the news, said to MutualFriend "it'd Be so sad if it was your first baby but I guess its not really a big deal as you've already got DC1,2,3"

Then told her it was clearly gods way of saying "you've got to many kids!"

What the actual fucking Jeff?!

She absolutely can't see that she's done anything wrong!

I'd be questioning the reality of this, if I hadn't seen it first-hand from someone I know.

I would have told her either she fucks off out of my sight, or for every second she says she gets a flying headbutt to the face. And I would have followed through with it - knock some sodding sense into the ignoramus!

Well DickFriend is still a Dick cunt!

But for the good news

After a loooot of further tests, MF baby will need surgery within the first few weeks of her life and will probably be slightly behind her peers wrt milestones (but will catch up in time) and may not be able to be an athlete due to lung problems (not severe)...but she will be here and alive and relatively healthy...and alive :) :o

Bloody hell. That has cheered me up. Good for MF's baby.

I can't imagine how she's feeling right now

But for all the right reasons :o

Yay! Have just read this thread like this and now I'm like this give dickcunt friend a slap punch from me.

, i can't even find the words to say haw awful that is, So sorry for your mutual friend.

Wannabe - Ellen is right, Deaf people (capital 'D' deliberate here) - and I mean sign-language users, not hard-of-hearing people with hearing aids - usually view Deafness as a culture, and are very cross at people who suggest it is a disability. Sign language is a proper, full, grammatical language just like any other. There is absolutely no reason why a Deaf person would be in the slightest bothered at having a Deaf child.

And, although I agree that parents must make up their own mind when it comes to conceiving future children who may, or may not, have a disability which will require lifelong care, I think that suggesting someone should NOT have a child who may be Deaf - a child who will grow up fully capable and independent, with every ability to enjoy life and contribute to society - is surely ignorant of the facts.

Wow. Never fails to amaze me how many stupid fucks there are available to cast shadows across our lives.

So sorry for the pg friend.

Oh hurrah! I am flooded with relief for your friend! But still so I am literally gasping at the 'dick friend'. It doesn't matter one jot if she doesn't have children - it was an unbelievably ghastly thing to say. If I was in your position I would be cutting the friendship totally and making sure she knows why.

I haven't seen or spoken to DF since I ended the friendship...although I'm slightly sad over the loss of friendship, I can never...and will never...be friends with someone like that.
I've no idea if she even regrets saying what she said but its to late regardless

Stealth when reading things like this I always thought "really?! Are there really people like this " unfortunately I also had to see it to believe it!

God, I'm just so crazy happy for her right now! I genuinely don't think I've ever heard someone sound as overjoyed as they did

Just found this thread. So happy that your friends baby is going to survive.

As for the other person, I really have no words.

Just to add to the discussions around Deaf parents... Those Deaf bsl using parents might have a preference for a deaf baby in the same way as some people have a preference for a boy or a girl, but the Deaf parents I know (who are profoundly Deaf with hearing children) were more concerned with having a healthy baby! (and deaf babies are healthy - they just can't hear!)

On a side note, I'm training to be a bsl interpreter in the uk, hence my references to bsl rather than other signed languages - nzsl etc!

Thanks Eglu :o

I lost ds4 at 20 weeks in September. I've been surprised at how insensitive some people are.

Good news that the baby is going to be ok.

Milk, so glad things are on the up for your one friend as for dick friend good for you for giving them a boot up the arse.

Glad also that someone picked up on and challenged the view of one poster on people knowingly having children that are born deaf & maybe they shouldn't that opinion riled me somewhat.

Dispicable.

Milk I'm sorry I have only read your posts on this thread, I'm glad to hear the outlook is positive for the baby.

What's MF's take on DF now? Is she aware you've ended your friendship with DF over this? Is she still speaking to DF? (I'm not trying to emphasis any particular point here, just nosey curious)

FWIW you sound like a loyal, compassionate friend.

Hardly ever do this as find it fairly inflammatory, but since it's not about you... . YANBU.

This is going to be one of those reverb comments; the kind you'll come back to thinking WTF?!

Don't now how MF feels about DF, I do know that they'll never ever speak again but anything further I don't know

So sorry Moomin x