To be a bit sad my dd wants her hair cut

[Molehillmountain]

Its long, nearly waist length (on a six year old) and blonde and wavy. She has several sensible reasons for wanting it cut (not just that her best friends hair is short!) and I don't want to be completely dominant and pushy on these sorts of things. And it is a pain to brush. But I'm still sad. Aibu? And should I veto the haircut?

Let her have it cut, and stop obsessing over her hair.

My mum was another one who controlled my hairstyles until I was a teenager. I hated my long princess hair and the stupid clips and tight ponytails I endured to stop it from getting in the way, or messy, or making me look like an Afghan hound. I had the whole lot off at 14 and never, ever grew it back. No regrets whatsoever. Mum now admits that it looked much thicker and in better condition short.

DD has rather thin hair that she has worn in variations on a bob since she was 4. It is a bit longer at the moment, but she changes her mind quite often.

Why do adults inflict long hair on small girls? It is impractical at school, takes ages to wash and dry, gets in the way, hot in summer, uncomfortable at night, and mainly there to fulfil someone else's idea as to how a child should LOOK.

Let her get it cut - as short as she wants.

I am 40 and i still have memories of brushing and combing of the long hair and dont even get me started on the sunday night regular nit check , i

Please let her have it cut. My mother was is very controlling and wouldn't let me have it cut, in the end I snuck off to the hairdressers when I was 17 and had it chopped. She went ballistic and wouldn't speak to me for ages, which was odd bearing on mind that she would whinge and bitch to anyone that would listen about the amount of work my hair was (I was really into dancing and had to have it 'up' a lot-couldn't do it myself as it was so long and thick).

I still resent my mum for it and I actually think it's unhealthy to not allow girls to have full autonomy over their body and appearance (providing what they want to do is safe).

My DD wouldn't want her hair cut, she loves her long hair! It isn't difficult for me to look after either and always looks nice. She has it in a plait at night so it isn't uncomfortable and it really suits her. Please don't judge what you don't know.

Just musing on all this and realise dd is at just the right age. She has asked before, but only once and now she realises it would be a while before it grows again. And shed have the magic seven or more inches to donate for wigs. I think part of my reluctance might come from my mother doing the opposite-not allowing long hair and I must be sure not to make the same sort of mistake.

she doesnt have to have it short short though she can still have some length to it , My dds have really thick wavy hair dd2 curls and gets tangled , takes a lot of looking after she is older though so thank for for thinning at the hairdressers ,

No.. And the curl might come back when it's shorter too.

Love short hair on little girls - it looks fab because it usually looks clean, neat and tidy. All the little girls with long hair I know always look like scarecrows. DNiece has long hair - it looks tatty and thin unless it's been brushed within the last 2 minutes. It's a drama every time it has to be washed, and takes her Mum about 15 mins to brush properly because of all the screeching. Her Dad says he never wants her to have it short because she looks like a princess. Bleurgh.

DS has always had 'longer' hair (his own choice).

At it's longest it touched the bottom of his shoulder blades. When he finally wanted it cut, I put it in a pony tail and chopped it off.

I kept the ponytail. You could do the same!

I can't decide folkgirl-dithering between keeping and donating. But I think since it'll be long enough we should donate. I worry I might not like the look of it away from its owner! Anyway-appointments booked and it feels right to give her the choice. The only thing I said was that short short was not an option for the first cut. It's one of those things that I imagine I will wonder what all the fuss was about afterwards!!

Dd now has gorgeous chin length (bit shorter than expected but it looks lovely and will grow). And I have a ten inch ponytail to send off to little princesses to help some child facing nigger issues than whether or not to have a haircut. Good result and thanks for help.

I cant believe we have got to 3 pages and havent mentioned THE M N hair cut. You don't have to go to the hairdressers you can do it yourself. Unicorn tail on her parting, bobble to required length, cut across and then snip into the remaining bobble shaving brush and that's it. Shortens, shapes, lightens and layers. Marvellous .

Nigger issues! Surely not

At least she's asking my DD(5) cut her own lovely long hair about 6 months ago and we had to have it cut into a short bob to even in out I was very but it's growing again now and she can't wait for it to get really long

Oh bigger issues! The mind boggles.

My DD is the same age and we've just cut the waist length curls too. I did it myself, into a bob.
It was beautiful but had to be worn up at school anyway and so wasn't worth the tangles, extra washing and care (which she hated). She now looks at least two years older but loves it.

my parents wouldn't let me have my hair cut and even when i was 14 and had a 6 inch trim (hair was still mid back) my mum cried and wouldn't talk to me. They always told me constantly it wouldn't suit me and i would look ugly and no one would fancy me etc. and as such i have never had the confidence to have it cut any shorter than boob length. When i said i was thinking of having a bob to dad he told me i wouldn't be welcome back in the house and they wouldn't love me as much! (joking i hope but i am 35 ffs!)

My sisters girls are almost 8 and they have dreadful long straggly hair below their bum. It's all wispy at the ends and never looks neat. My sister washes it every day and spends hours brushing and drying it (she treats them like dolls). Swimming is a real chore. I just find it creepy how my family all coo over it too. All i see is impractical, not even nice, split hair.

I would definitely encourage any girls to have nice functional hair.

Spuddy - I feel a bit proud of myself for getting over myself on this one and letting dd have choice where she should rightly have it. I watch her putting together outfits with more style than I have and am really quite excited. And her hair, whilst beautiful, was due a significant trim to get it back into condition. So happens it was a drastic trim, but one with extra benefits. And if the little hair creatures pay a visit it'll be soooo much easier.

molehill - well done for letting go. i think people project so much on girls hair and you don't realise how much it affects their sense of self. My friends growing up had different hair styles and cuts but i still have the same hair do i had when i was 5! it is important to know your whole sense of self worth is not wrapped up in looking feminine and impractical!

Thank you! I am going to treat myself to coffee and cake today