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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect a 10 year old to finish his biscuit?

132 replies

bananatrifle · 13/02/2012 17:07

I don't mind a child trying anything to see if they like it - it's a good thing in my mind as it widens their taste experiences. Anyway, I always give just a small amount of whatever it is (teaspoonful for example) and if they like it then they can have more. If they don't then nothing's lost.

However, surely a 10 year old should finish a small amaretti (spelling?) biscuit, not eat half of it, try to put it back on the plate and then say he was going to put it in the bin as he didn't like it. I can understand that they're not to everyone's liking, but I think it's rude to just not finish what you've started to eat. It's not a very big biscuit, and I think the principle is to just eat something that you've started.

No big deal really, just wondered what anyone else thought?

OP posts:
Original poster
bananatrifle · 13/02/2012 17:37

Doyouthink I didn't expect him to try it. He asked to try it. I let him.

OP posts:
GandTiceandaSprout · 13/02/2012 17:37

And threads like these is why I love MN!

BoysAreLikeDogs · 13/02/2012 17:38

Okay

We need to know

Guest or your own child?

Original poster
bananatrifle · 13/02/2012 17:38

Guest

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 13/02/2012 17:39

He asked to try it

He tried it

He didn't like it

He left it

BoysAreLikeDogs · 13/02/2012 17:39

Okay

next question

do you like him?

Original poster
bananatrifle · 13/02/2012 17:40

Yes

OP posts:
Original poster
bananatrifle · 13/02/2012 17:40

I was brought up in Victorian times

It shows

OP posts:
BoysAreLikeDogs · 13/02/2012 17:42

I think it's just yanked your chain, understandable given your upbringing

Go have a cup of tea and revel in the heat from the roasting we've given you

Chin up

Original poster
bananatrifle · 13/02/2012 17:43

Yes, tea with gin in I think

OP posts:
OnlyANinja · 13/02/2012 17:44

YABU

He could probably tell that you were going to be arsey about him not eating it and that's why he put it back on the plate (which is yuck).

lorcana · 13/02/2012 17:45

OP you are a fusspot . Leave the kid alone it's a frigging biscuit for god sake.

Distended · 13/02/2012 17:46

Wait hang on, did he have his own plate or was is a communal biscuit plate?

McHappyPants2012 · 13/02/2012 17:48

Yabu.

Why would someone eat something they do not like.

SuiGeneris · 13/02/2012 17:48

YANBU: at 10 politeness should override whims and amaretti are very small. But we seem to be in the minority.

eaglewings · 13/02/2012 17:48

It's so hard to re educate ourselves to not finishing our plates even though we are full, it goes against the grain
I have to keep a few stock phrases in mind for when I'm tempted to tell the kids to et up. I remind myself that it is better to over feed the bin than my body etc.
What is even harder is when grand parents tell the kids to eat up. I know why they say it, but after trying to get the kids to recognise tummy full signs, it's confusing for the kids

SuiGeneris · 13/02/2012 17:50

Ps: especially given he was a guest. I'd be mortified if my DS did that.

toomuchmonthatendofthemoney · 13/02/2012 17:51

All it needs now is to make discussions of the day and be Matthew wrights hot topic tomorrow and our job here is done Grin

SuiGeneris · 13/02/2012 17:52

Who's Matthew Wright?

Original poster
bananatrifle · 13/02/2012 17:52

There are a couple of posters here who I think get what it is I'm trying to get at - it's the politeness thing really.

I know everyone has different tastes. The children had all had fairy cakes while we had our cups of tea/coffee and opened up the aforementioned biscuits of crime and passion. The lad said he wanted one, he was given one, but although he didn't like it, it was very small and I do agree with SuiGeneris that politeness should override whims and he should have just finished it in the next small mouthful.

It's a bit like saying 'Thankyou so much' for a present you've been given but really don't like.

OP posts:
littlemisssarcastic · 13/02/2012 17:55

My mother gets upset if people don't finish what is on their plates. She actually feels deeply hurt if people cannot eat the last few mouthfuls. I don't understand this at all.

If your guest ate the biscuit OP, the biscuit would be gone. No one else can eat it.
If your guest didn't finish the biscuit, and the remainder of the biscuit went into the bin, the biscuit would be gone. No one else can eat it unless they rummage in the bin for it.

What is the difference in outcome? Confused

Tbh OP, this says more about your food issues than it does about your guests manners.

OnlyANinja · 13/02/2012 17:56

Isn't being forced to finish food when you don't like it or are not hungry a really bad habit to get into?

SuiGeneris · 13/02/2012 17:58

Exactly. And yes, I do expect adults to finish what they put on their plates. Take a little but finish it. Not to finish is like saying "this is so disgusting I cannot eat it", which one would never say. So why do it?

Original poster
bananatrifle · 13/02/2012 17:58

I'm not sure I have food issues as such; at least I don't think so.

Hmmm.

If something is eaten by someone it's not a waste, but if it's half eaten and thrown away, then it is wasted. I think that's the difference.

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 13/02/2012 17:59

DId your guest gag, claw the biscuit out of his mouth and say "fuck me that was disgusting!" or did he politely put the biscuit back/in the bin and say he didn't like it?

If the latter, then his manners are fine.