DH has started smoking a pipe

[LaCoccinelle]

This is more of a 'is DH being unreasonable', because there isn't actually a lot I can do about it other than sulk. DH has got himself a pipe, he used to smoke the odd cigarette but has not done so since we have been together (he has asthma so it's a Very Bad Idea to smoke), I do not smoke, never have, and hate the smell, I am also a sneezy allergic type and get runny nose/eyes etc around smoke. We also have 2 young DCs, I don't want smoke around them.

He's mentioned he'd like a pipe before and I have said that I absolutely do not want it to happen in the house, if he must smoke he can do it outside, and he should bear in mind I will not come near him while he stinks of tobacco.

This morning his study smells very strongly of tobacco and there is a pipe on the desk. So what do I do - is he BU? Do I have to just accept this new 'hobby'? or should I leave the bastard?

Sorry OP cross posted with you, wasn't just basically repeating what you said

He sounds so stupid.

I'd hate to live with a stupid man. I'd hate even more though to live with a thoroughly stupid man who thinks he's dead clever, or worse - fancies himself to be intellectual.

He's intellectual all right... in the way sixth-formers think they are. How grim.

Tell him to grow up or his silly new habit might prove to be the wake-up call you need to move on from someone you've CLEARLY begun to outgrow. Because you aren't stuck, you know. Tell him that, and show him this thread.

Dip the pipestem in this
www.chilliworld.com/SP6.asp?p_id=18

and wait for the reaction...

My much older brother tried smoking q pipe when he was about 18 - he was about to go up to Oxford and fancied himself something shocking. We bring out the photographs sometimes and laugh heartily.

chaz excellent plan!!

Hearty laughing accompanied by a judicious application of some of that earwax-tasting stuff that is used to stop people biting their nails to the stem of the pipe...

Oh how awful. FWIW when I was little my uncle used to smoke a pipe and as a child I used to think it was glamorous now if I get a wiff of pipe smoke I get transported back to my aunt and uncles lovely house. I can't stand more than a wiff of it though and I lost my gran to lung cancer so I'm very much against smoking. I wonder if there is something like this for him except that he's decided that he's going to relive it himself.
Awful though, for both you and the children.
I'd say that you're not doing him any favours to nod and smile when he is lying to himself about the dangers though. I'd refuse to facilitate it.
I'd insist he went outside, every time he tried the "it wont hurt me I'm superman" bull I 'd sternly say "It's medically proven. You are choosing to do this both to yourself and your family." then refuse to engage in conversation. Then paint on disgusting stuff maybe something like that nail stuff onto his pipe at every available opportunity. Is that flammable?

Red pen a go-go there sorry about that! Hope you get the gist though

My dad used to smoke a pipe he wasnt that old either he is 61 , he also used to smoke toe odd ciggie usually in the pub , I didnt think men smoked pipes anymore has he got his slippers too I used to love the smell of it , obviously not great breathing int he fumes though meant to be healthier than fags though

tell him pipe smokers are most likely to end up with oral cancer,failing that dioe it in mustard secretly that should put him off

I have several friends that smoke pipes.

But they don't put tobacco in them.

Is it definitely a tobacco smell, and not a little more... herbal?

dip

You have my sympathies. Mine has grown a beard.

murming mine grew a tache for last years movember and wanted to keep it

The biggest risk is that he is asthmatic.

The next is smoking around kids.

I think you should insist he only smokes it with the other chaps at his club, or on the verandah or in the gazebo.

There is a bit of evidence that pipe smoking is safer cancer wise than other smoking, and he is not wrong about genetic susceptibility, but I'd still hold off smoking with kids in the house as your genes may be a bit rum.

Print out a nice, big colour picture of a diseased lung and hang over desk next to picture of DC.

My sympathies OP. I thought I had trouble when DH bought a shed.

Mid life crisis, and he has decided to become sherlock holmes. Interesting. I would bin it. And every one that followed it. Silly old fool.

DH already has the beard [rollseyes].

Deffo not 'herbal', just plain old nasty tobacco in an old man pipe.

I might let the dog 'accidentally' find the pipe and chew it to bits.

Mid life crisis, and he has decided to become sherlock holmes

Given that the other options are a bright red sports car, a mistress, or golf......

"I might let the dog 'accidentally' find the pipe and chew it to bits"

YES. Great idea or, take the low road and develop a highly annoying habit that will drive him up the wall.

And make sure there is a smoke alarm in the study...

Isn't there greater risk of oral and throat cancer with pipe smoking?

Just as an exercise, ask him to write down how he will put it into words if he has to tell his children that they are going to see him die of a serious illness that will be painful, frightening, and perhaps disfiguring and humiliating, and to explain to them that he got it because he liked smoking a pipe.

I stopped smoking cigarettes 10 years ago after having that conversation with myself.

Or just say, grown up to grown up "You smoking a pipe is unpleasant for me and other members of the family- please stop doing it." and he will say"I'm sorry, I didn't realise, of course I will" and you say "thank you" and it's sorted,

Worried about the dog getting cancer if it chews the pipe ( tries to keep straight face!)