AIBU, or should clients not expect you to be at your desk 24 hours a day?

[iamnotjustaworker]

Namechanged for this, as don't want to get myself into trouble..

but

ok, so I work in the city. Yes, it's high pressured, and the pay is not bad.
BUT, clients, you should understand this:

• I do, contrary to what you may expect of your advisers, have a life. I try not to express or reveal that if at all possible, but, yes, I have a life that exists outside of the office.

• I do, also, have other clients. They also want my undivided attention. Sorry about that.

• I do, also, have managers wanting other various pieces of me. Sorry about that as well, but if I didn't attend to that, I wouldn't be here in the office advising you at all as I would be out of a job.

• If I don't respond to an email or phone call within 30 minutes, that does not mean I have disappeared. That means I might have something else that is equally urgent. It might even mean that I am busy taking care of your matter and ensuring that I can give you the best advice that I can.

I've finished now. Thank you for listening.
Do tell me if IABU.

I am self employed. if i don't do the work when it is there then someone else does and i don't get paid. i get calls at stupid o clock every day and have to smile and do my job or the person on the other end will go elsewhere. i personally blame it on mobile phones (oooh theres controversy) in the good old days when we couldnt be contacted all the time, i think people were a bit more considerate. now they want it now and won't wait and why should they. they can call me from the middle of nowhere. As for thinking people care about you as a person - they don't. they don't give a stuff what crisis you have just so long as you do their work first because they are the most important person in the world. try being self employed for a year - much crapper wages than the city and you are even more on call.

I got an email at 10pm last night asking me something for this morning. A) I don't work full time so 10pm on a Friday night isn't fair, b) if you knew you were having a meeting the following morning then you should have contacted me earlier, c) its fucking friday night, go to the sodding pub and let me MN in peace.

And I am not in a remotely important of interesting job.

Its people. They are quite irritating really

And my clients don't get billed, irritatingly, infact we probably give them a better deal than they give us...................bastards

whatnoketchup - it sounds like you have quite a different job to me.

You may also live closer to work, not have young dcs, a oh that actually helps with anything etc. There is only so much time management etc. one can do - sometimes actual work needs to be done that doesn't consist of a 5 minute phone call. And sometimes one's ability to do that is hindered by the many demands life has.

There seems to be quite a divided opinion on here - so, it's either:

• people can be selfish and horrible - I sympathise ; or
• people can be selfish and horrible - deal with it, and try dealing with my job too - it's worse.

so thanks for the vote of confidence for humanity.
Quite depressing reading really.

iamnotaworker - the culture doesn't change because those who get sick of it leave, and the people who stay are the ones who don't mind/thrive on it. Having said that, the Big 4 do make all the right noises about family-friendly working, work-life balance and that sort of thing. Are you making the most of what is available to you?

I am guessing you may be quite junior (cos you talk of working to managers not partners). If you're just waiting to qualify before looking elsewhere then start counting down & thinking about job adverts/recruitment agencies. All jobs have their down-sides but if you just fundamentally don't like the client service environment then best to acknowledge it, benefit from the experience and move on.

I have had 2 spells in practice and both times it was internal things rather than clients that caused me to want to leave. Clients are the easy bit, in my experience!

tbh, I have changed a couple of details (eg talking about 'managers') so as not to out myself! but pretty junior, yes. and agreed, issues more internal than external. And yes, definitely making the most of what is available to me.

Was just a minor moan... not on teh point of leaving or anything. Pretty happy with my job really (as said above) - just occasionally people astound me in their rudeness / selfishness etc. Not just at work - happens everywhere. I should be used to it.

and tbh, I actually do thrive on it. But still, doesn't mean I love every living moment of it!

Some people are just unreasonable, just do less for them than you do for the reasonable ones!

I once got a draft of a dissertation chapter, months overdue, e-mailed to me by the student on Christmas Eve...by Boxing day I had an irrate e-mail asking whether I had read it yet and where were the comments!!

It's not just a City thing, or in highly-remunerated jobs. I'm academic at a non-London institution, and get paid peanuts, and I get students complaining that they came to my office 'but you weren't there' (turns out they dropped by after eight at night) or sending emails late at night specifically expecting an immediate response, because it was a question about an exam or an essay deadline the next morning.

Booboostoo, oh, snap.

YABU

I am in the office right now, waiting for a call. I was in the office last night. That's life. I am paid way beyond what I am worth. Someone will doubtless work this out in due course and besides I am getting long in the tooth. The City, rather like the BBC, is harder on ageing women than it is on ageing men. So I had better roll my sleeves up and get on with it. That's life, frankly.

The question is, for some people, why do you have your work mobile on overnight? Why are you checking emails at 10pm? Modern technology has certainly speeded up business but, unlike landline phones and the postman, modern devices all come with 'off' buttons. Unless someone is likely to die if you aren't contactable 24/7, there is no reason for you not to use them.

Agghh - Quattrocento - sorry, but another misunderstood post ..
I am not complaining about long hours - I have no problem with working late nights, weekends, whatever. I have a problem with the presumption that I must give an answer on any question, at any time, within 10 minutes (even if that question demands more time to ensure the correct answer).
My point being that I may be in a meeting / discussing a problem with a senior colleague etc.

as I said - no problem with emails at 10pm, or any time for that matter.
see above post.
(in fact, I keep my blackberry on as I use it as a clock / alarm)

maybe my title was misleading.

The operative words being 'at your desk' - Obviously I'm always working but can't always be tied to my desk as expected.

Sounds to me like you need some stock responses to deal with these situations such as "Thanks for your email, I need to run my answer by the partner before I can I respond to you" or "Here's my gut feel as to the answer.....blah blah blah....however I need to get the partner to confirm they agree with me". Also "Sorry, I am about to go into a meeting, I will be able to respond by....." or "Sorry I was in a meeting, I will just take a look at that now and respond by.....".

If you're out of the office for any length of time put your out of office on and do your voicemail greeting on a daily basis.

You sound like you're having a moment. Because if this stuff really bothers you, you're in the wrong job. Being junior, this is your lot. You earn what - 80-90-100k? Maybe less if you are really junior. and basically at the end of the day, you don't know very much about the job you do. Sure you have great degrees and all that, but dealmaking etc, you're just starting out. I'm sure you are a nice person really but you appear to have a bit of a sense of entitlement. If you really want to help the economy or the cause of women working, there are plenty of other things you can do and plenty of people who'll take your place. I suspect really, like many juniors, you just want a good old moan and work easy hours and still take home your fat pay packet at the end of the day. If you don't like it there are many things you can do, but the "other people" you are making rich (partners? clients?) have all been where you are (probably got paid a lot less at your stage too) and have put in the hours and done the learning. So either accept the situation, learn to manage unreasonable expectations (which you will do as you get more senior) or go and do something else which doesn't pay quite so well but fits with what you want out of your life.

Blimey there are some very harsh responses here which (Quattro apart) seem to be due to OP taking home a "fat pay cheque". Someone gave me some astute advice a few years ago which was that once you're earning more than the average person you aren't allowed to have a bad day or have problems because the money is first and last what everyone would think of and no one gives a damn about your "problems". OP clearly just needs to learn how to handle these situations better and the same would apply to anyone have rant about their job whether they £10k or £100k.

That's the whole point though novice - the pay makes all the difference - the remuneration for those jobs is high (even at a v.junior level) because of the demands it places on you.

you are still entitled to have a whinge. ultimately the pay is pretty irrelevant - no one can pay you enough to make shit treatment acceptable.

however taking a certain amount of crap is part of working with clients/the general public/ humanity in general. c'est la vie. If you are absolutely determined never to work with twats, you have pretty much signed yourself up for a life of unemployment.

Thanks Endlessallanpoe and noviceoftheday -

As said repeatedly above - I am not complaining about long hours / putting up with crap / many demands / having no life etc. Just asking that within all of that, people also recognise that there is still a certain way to treat people.

And it is ridiculous to talk about my 'fat pay cheque' - as Endlessallanpoe and noviceoftheday kindly pointed out, does the amount you are paid have a direct correlation as to how you should be treated and how much you may or may not be allowed to complain about it??

So, what you are saying Wildheaven and others is - I should take a lower paid job just so that I can be treated just as badly but then be entitled to have a moan every once in a while?? Sorry, but that is ridiculous logic.

Equally, the more one earns the more silent one should be? No wonder suicides happen amongst people like this - who have to work very hard, are told (apparently even by others on Mumsnet) to not mention a word of upset or complaint .. bloody hell - if you can't reveal any of this at work or to anyone in RL (for reasons set out above) then who can you turn to?

I am a big fan of Mumsnet (and, in fact, as said earlier, my job, generally), but this whole thread has disappointed me somewhat.

And Wildheaven - just to get back to that point - are you seriously suggested that everyone should be badly paid and complain about it a lot? Because that's how it comes across.

But presumably your job is not like this 52 weeks of the year. presumably it is cyclical and there are stress points, and there are quiet patches where this is not the case. Also presumably not all clients are like this, and some colleagues/seniors are more supportive than others.

If you feel unsupported and out of your depth, then that's one thing and it should be addressed. If you are on a long running transaction and someone is consistently unreasonable over a long period of time, or if someone is openly rude, you should speak to someone senior about the conduct of that person (and as I say, you need to learn to manage difficult people and unreasonable demands generally, which you will do in the long term). But all that aside, like it or not, having chosen to work in a service industry in the City (and take the considerable financial rewards it offers) will have implications for your lifestyle. And those implications are not for everyone. I've seen people manage it brilliantly and have great careers and lives as a result and I've seen people throw in the towel and do something a lot less stressful. But I disagree that there is a particular problem with suicides in this line of work - doesn't seem that way to me and I suspect if you look at statistics many other professions are far worse.

Also you're a fan of mumsnet, but if you read it with any regularity you will see that many people work incredibly hard for a fraction of what you make and encounter very difficult people and stressful situations in any line of work - the caring professions, customer service, nursing, charity, retail, you name it. Many people struggle against remarkable adversity, financial, health wise etc. So I for one am really not surprised you didn't get a great hearing on this thread - AIBU is notoriously harsh in any event!

fair enough - but that's partly my point isn't it?

Just because I happen not to have financial worries at the moment does not mean there are other issues in my life that I am dealing with right now. Just doing the professional thing and never mentioning those things at work (or on here). That's kind of what I'm getting at - everyone has things they may be dealing with (illness, marriage breakdown- whatever) but it looks like you can't complain about them, yet, at the same time, can't complain about not being able to complain about them?

Sorry, not expressing myself very well am I?

I posted specifically on AIBU because I wanted honest opinions. and again, fair enough, I have them. Just saying that they are a bit disappointing and has made me a little bit more depressed about humanity in general.