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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be pissed off with DH?

43 replies

Sparklyblue · 04/02/2012 17:36

My DD2 aged 6 is at a party, it started at 3 and it ends at 6.
It is snowing and is -1C out there.
My DH had planned to watch the England game with a friend at a pub, bearing in mind this is his 1st night out for a while.
He has gone out, leaving me to walk in the snow with DD3 aged 3 in the dark for 20 mins to get DD2 and then 20 mins back.
I was hoping he would nip out to pick her up and then get pack to the game.
It is his 1st night out for ages, but I feel he has put this before me and our daughters. I'm so peeded off I don't know if IBU or not?
Over to you, the jury Confused

OP posts:
Original poster
Sparklyblue · 04/02/2012 17:37

I'm off out to get DD, will be back in a bit. Thanks

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 04/02/2012 17:39

Sorry but you and your kids won't spontaneously combust in the snow.

20 mins there and back isn't a big deal unless it's a blizzard and the snowdrifts are likey to come up over your head Grin

If it was rain would you feel the same way?

squeakytoy · 04/02/2012 17:40

I dunno.. most kids love walking in the snow... 20 mins each way would probably be fun for most kids if they are wrapped up, and they would see it as a treat rather than a chore.

If he is watching a game, then let him watch it.. it is a bit unfair to make him miss most of it.

And the snow stops it being too dark.

Portofino · 04/02/2012 17:41

God - people have got so soft!

JustHecate · 04/02/2012 17:41

Did you ask him to or did you stay quiet waiting for him to offer?

If you'd said "Can you just nip back to get X from the party so that I don't have to take Y out in the freezing cold" would he have?

You'd think it would occur to him! but sometimes it just doesn't and you have to say something.

LilPud · 04/02/2012 17:42

Did you ask him to pick up DD from the party or were you just hopeful that he would think of it himself? You can't be p*ssed off if you didn't ask. Unfortunatley men aren't very perceptive and sometimes need told.

diddl · 04/02/2012 17:43

Why won´t he nip from the pub-and how long would it have taken him?

That said I do agree with Worra

As long as you´re all wrapped up OK it´s not so bad.

Hope you have a sledge!

mayorquimby · 04/02/2012 17:44

yabu

SydSaid · 04/02/2012 17:45

Did you ask him, or are you expecting him to have esp?

squeakytoy · 04/02/2012 17:45

It is his 1st night out for ages, but I feel he has put this before me and our daughters

He rarely goes out... it is a very important rugby match (so I am being informed by the one watching it here).. so give the bloke a break.

lisaro · 04/02/2012 17:46

YABU, let him enjoy the game! The snow won't kill you.

learningtofly · 04/02/2012 17:47

Here in the Ltf house rugby is taken very seriously and loathed as I would be I would walk.

diddl · 04/02/2012 17:48

"it is a very important rugby match"

Ha ha!

Is there any such thing?

GypsyMoth · 04/02/2012 17:49

Is this real??

How odd! How on earth do you think us lone parents manage??

taxiforme · 04/02/2012 17:50

Hi

I agree that you are kind of BU.

Give the bloke a break, make the walk a fun one in an enchanted sparkly forest way and remind your DH of his luxurious day when you are needing an hour (make that two) in the bath with some choccies and wine and SILENCE, later.

AThingInYourLife · 04/02/2012 17:51

I wouldn't want to be walking about in sub-zero temperatures after dark with a little kid.

Did you ask him to pick her up?

LittlePandaBear · 04/02/2012 18:05

Surely getting a taxi could have been an option if you really didn't want to go out in the snow?

ragingmull · 04/02/2012 18:58

yabvu and silly. and lazy.

FredFredGeorge · 04/02/2012 19:06

You were "hoping", so YABU, I'd be annoyed, insulted and not at all happy if my DP decided to leave their first night out in a while to do something as trivial as not walking in the snow - indeed walking in the snow is the sort of thing I might expect her to want to do with the kids so come back so we could all do it.

QuintessentialyHollow · 04/02/2012 19:07

Snow is not toxic. Just cold.

AThingInYourLife · 04/02/2012 19:12

Cold can be dangerous for small children.

Temperatures can drop quickly after it gets dark. When snow is falling visibility can get really bad, and you can get very wet.

It's not "lazy" not to want a 3 year old to go for a 40 minute walk in those conditions.

GypsyMoth · 04/02/2012 19:13

But Eskimo children live to grow up!!

Dangerous!! Dear lord..... It's Britain not Siberia!!

QuintessentialyHollow · 04/02/2012 19:14

I beg to differ. Cold is not dangerous for small children if they are wearing good clothing, including warm footwear, hat and mittens.

Otherwise, most of Norway, finland, Sweden and in fact most of Northern Europe declared a dangerous wasteland.

TidyDancer · 04/02/2012 19:18

Yes, I'm sorry, but I agree with the majority here. What are your grounds for thinking it's more appropriate for your DH to go? Snow and a 20 minute walk are not reasonable really.

DD needs picking up. You are the parent with nothing else to do. It's totally reasonable for you to be the one to do the collection.

ragingmull · 04/02/2012 19:21

Well the OP's husband was busy, her DC needed picking up. I can't see that the 3yo was in danger, unless the OP dressed her in shorts and a t-shirt.