To think my health visitor is evil?!

[anicecupofteaandsomechocolate]

Bumped into hv today - she actually checked to see if my ds could breathe! He was tucked in under the footmuff with his comforter over his head (which is how he likes to go to sleep!) but it's cosy and keeps the harsh wind off his face and of course I make sure that he can breathe!! She just always manages to make me feel like an un-fit mother! She has previously told me off for having infacol in the front room where 3 year old dd could reach it, told me off for not strapping ds into his bouncy chair, been horrified at dd answering the phone and the front door (not unsupervised)!! It might just be me but she really makes me grrrrr! I do wonder if she is actually human! Thank goodness dmil has the dcs now so I can try and chill out!

Really!

Sounds like she's just doing her job

It's ok for a 3 year old to answer the door supervised but what if you were on the loo & she opened it to a stranger/ burglar? Or do you keep it locked?

Ummm.................................

Your sensitive and defensive because you feel bad about silly things like not strapping in and your too egotistical to be told. Im the same
She is just doing her job, Your not a terrible parent going by your post but human...

i believe some h.v are spawns of the devil...i had one that constanty made me feel undermined and questoned even the most basic of things i did...im told she "liked doing things by the book".
i like to think we dont belong in boxes and should be treated as individuals,so in answer to your question i'd probably say YES

You really do need to strap him in to the bouncy chair though. I once didn't with older dd (HV never mentioned it as an issue, she was too busy having a go at us for owning too many books and not washing up straight after breakfast when we were both working full time...) and she chose that exact moment to learn to sit up- they can have a nasty bash on the head if they do this and topple on to the floor!

She does sound a bit ott, but she's probably just trying to help?

(Reason I am not concerned about the infacol is that you can't overdose on it, it's basically carbon in sugar solution, there is no active ingredient- if you're leaving other medications in reach you need to stop that too!)

What Stranded said

you must starp ypur baby into a bouncey chair its really silly not too he could roll out fall over , I think she was just doing her job she is paid to help look after children , I think you are being a little defensive .

strap your* my typing today

I haven't seen my HV since she told me that I simply must get "a live-in Filipino" , and that DC3 was smaller than DC1 or DC2 because "my placenta was getting used up [or she might have said "worn out"] after 3 DC".

Okay, so to be balanced on this, most of the responses say you are (slightly) irresponsible. And you say she's evil. Possibly everyone is right today. :)

the OP says (not unsupervised) so I don't think she is allowing her child to open the door to strangers while she is on the loo... massive mental leap there!

Yes the front door is always locked, dd just liked to open the door after I'd unlocked it to see people in and to see people out, dd is very sensible and wouldn't have drank the infacol, all medicines are in a high cupboard, I have strapped ds into the bouncy chair since he was a couple of months old but at a few weeks old did not but wouldn't have left him in there unsupervised, the comforter covers most of his face but I leave his nose free so he can breathe...I don't think these are things I should have to explain to the hv but yes thanks for making me think about it a bit more objectively everyone - how good that she takes her job so seriously, what a dedicated person she is :)

live in fillapino

I think 'evil' might be pushing it! You clearly find her behaviour upsetting, so maybe her people skills aren't as good as they could be. However, I'm afraid that it sounds like she's trying to do her job - which is double-checking our parenting!!

Put it this way: if she took every mum's word for it (whatever 'it' might be) in every house she went to then she'd be a pretty poor HV - it's her job to check. I understand how you feel but sorry, I think she's doing the right thing.

Too busy telling us off for owning too many books - well that'd be me screwed then
OP, don't think it's unreasonable in itself for your hv to mention any of these things but I can see that you maybe feel a bit got at if she mentions relativly minor stuff everytime you see her. I do agree with previous posters that not using the straps in the bouncing chair is unsafe though.

I would be irritated in your position too.

But -what if she hadn't checked and the baby was unheating/having breathing difficulties? What if you hadn't checked? I think she would have been failing in her job if she had noticed the baby was all covered up but hadn't done anything...

Ditto with the medicine and strapping the baby in - part of her role is to give home safety advice.

I'm not sure about the phone/door though.

By "unheating" I meant "overheating^.

IABU to think she's 'evil' and going to go and have a glass of wine now- thanks all :)

Say yes, thanks ever so much for bringing that to my attention.

She goes off happy and then you can just ignore her.

That said, you really should strap a child into a bouncer..

X-posts with everyone else.

Tmesis at the placenta comment. Did you tell her you hadn't been re-using the same one?