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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

...to think I didn't pay for parenting advice with my Taxi fare?

48 replies

ginnybag · 27/01/2012 09:19

On Friday morning's I drop my DD, just turned 2 last week, at her Childminder's house. Most weeks we walk, but this week she's been full of a cold, has a rattly cough and it was absolutely pouring down. I though better of getting her soaked wet through.

I could have put her in the pram but a) she isn't fond of it, b) it means I get soaked wet through and I have a 9am meeting that I have to presentable for - not look like a drowned rat.

I called a taxi (with appropriate car seats etc!). It arrives. We get in. I strap us both in the back and off we go.

DD sat very nicely. She babbled at me a bit, but not overly loudly or anything. There was no kicking of seat backs or jumping up and down.

After I dropped her off, Taxi Driver asks me why I got the taxi. I replied 'too far for her to walk, she's too heavy for me to carry that far and she hates her pram.' I wasn't really paying attention, to be honest, just answering off-hand.

My mistake.

Cue hissing though teeth and... "well, that's what's wrong with modern parents. You let the child dictate. You shouldn't let her do that. You should take control. Just don't give her a choice. What do you think mothers in the wild do? If the child misbehaves they give them a nip! That's what you should do - if she plays up, give her a smack!"

I was too shocked to respond - and I'm normally the first to argue back - so I said nothing other than directions for the rest of the trip to work.

Didn't stop him from adding - "good luck training your child!" as I shut the door.

I'm fuming, so I'm on here blowing off steam. Am I right to be?

OP posts:
Garliccheesechips · 27/01/2012 09:20

Who cares what he thinks? Forget all about it and if it's really got to you then report him to his rank.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 27/01/2012 09:21

Taxi drivers go on special courses on how to be nosey busybodies with extra modules in over-the-shoulder, casual racism, sexism, sport, politics and child-rearing. Obviously, you don't book that firm again.

PomBearAtTheGatesOfDoom · 27/01/2012 09:21

you lost me at "in the wild" - next time you see him, pee on the seat and tell him you took his wonderful advice and have gone back to nature and into the wild... Grin (oh and yes, he's an arse!)

BandOMothers · 27/01/2012 09:21

I would have complained to the company in writing. the twat!

Pootles2010 · 27/01/2012 09:21

I think you're being touch oversensitive. Taxi drivers are so often like that, they like to witter on about immigrants, forriners, young people today.... just ignore. I agree he was wrong, but there's no point in getting cross.

OnlyANinja · 27/01/2012 09:22

YANBU to think you didn't pay for parenting advice - but you got some thrown in for free. Like a free gift. How nice :)

RedBlanket · 27/01/2012 09:24

'mothers in the wild' Grin

Birdsgottafly · 27/01/2012 09:26

If that shocks you into silence, how do you cope in the real world.

To write to his employer would be ridiculous, all you had to do was answer him. The reason you got a taxi was so that you wouldn't get wet, i don't understand why you origonally gave the reply that you did. He didn't say anything offensive, illegal, or discriminatory.

We (as humans) have been given the ability to communicate for a reason.

Mrsgradgrind · 27/01/2012 09:28

What a prat, him, not you. YANBU. Talk about biting the hand that feeds you!

coraltoes · 27/01/2012 09:29

Why the hell pent up your anger for us?! Just answer back, feel better, move on. Don't bloody write to them...grow up.

SmethwickBelle · 27/01/2012 09:31

YANBU, Ignore it - what an idiot, some cab divers (and people in general of course) are twats.

In a cab last month I was asking if I could pay by card (was the sort of cab you can do this in) and he went into one saying I was a BANKERS DREAM using my card instead of cash all the time, probably up to my eyes in debt because of all the shoes I've bought (or "no come to think of it you probably bat your eyes and get your husband to buy them"...)

It was a debit card, I don't HAVE credit cards. I think it makes more financial sense to pay by the transaction rather than taking a wedge out of the wall. I don't have a shoe fixation and am the least "girlie" girl I know. I don't habitually bat owt at anyone.

Twat.

BackToBligg · 27/01/2012 09:32

I would be in a boiling rage about this so rant away!

Hullygully · 27/01/2012 09:32

hahahahahahahaha

I find the best thing to do is agree with them, really enthusiastically and see quite how far they'll go. Ver entertaining.

cutegorilla · 27/01/2012 09:33

"mothers in the wild" Confused

Firawla · 27/01/2012 09:34

surely he should prefer u got the taxi than walked as it gives him more work?? yanbu that he was rude but i wouldn't dwell on it.
taxi driver standards are slipping lately anyway, quite a few times ive found they dont even know where various streets are anymore - thought thats part of the job description! i've found drivers normally nice to my dc or indifferent, so i would probably feel quite peed off like you if they did dish out such "advice"

NeldaAufwader · 27/01/2012 09:35

Take it with a pinch of salt, the taxi driver we had the day after our wedding, on finding out we were newly-weds went on at length about his divorce, how marriage was shit, people were mugs etc. etc. Husband and I smiled sweetly and laughed about it later.
I know it's hard when it feels like a personal slight but do you honestly care what a stranger thinks about your life? No matter how vocal they are.

OhDoAdmitMrsDeVere · 27/01/2012 09:38

This is what MN is for isnt it? Venting pent up rage to strangers when we should have said something witty and devastating at the time. Grin

He was a knob. I am not suprised you are pissed off. Hopefully writing it on here will make you feel better.

I used to have to get cabs nearly every day when DS2 was newborn. He was going to and from contacts with birth mum.
A couple of times the cab drivers said 'you dont mind if I smoke do you love?'

Er yes you twat I do as it goes . I would rather you didnt I said out loud.

JustHecate · 27/01/2012 10:17

I am practicing "Why do you want to know?" so that I can use it confidently in situations like this - When people ask me something that is none of their business.

How much do you earn?
Why do you want to know?

Why did you get a taxi?
Why do you want to know?

Why did you have X children?
Why do you want to know?

I have always been a bugger for answering any question anyone asks me, regardless whether I want to, or whether it's stuff all to do with them. Somehow feel that I am obliged to.

I am retraining myself and recommend you do too.

ginnybag · 27/01/2012 10:57

Thanks for the replies.

I've no intention of writing to the company - I never said I was going to - that would be an overreaction, and also an utter waste of my time! I'm not likely even to pick up the phone. I did vent my ire by not giving him my usual tip!

It just irked me, and by the time I'd thought of how I should have replied, he'd gone. I wasn't going to argue with him whilst he's driving down a road with no footpaths, but I should have retaliated when he'd pulled up.

In hindsight, he's actually quite funny! I'm really, really wishing I'd thought fast enough to react to the 'mother's in the wild' crack. Possibly by barking - or sticking my head out of the window and howling!

OP posts:
soandsosmummy · 27/01/2012 12:03

I had to take a taxi a couple of years ago to get DD to the children's hospital and the driver gave me medical advice the whole way. In fact he went into quite a bit of detail, quizzed dD and told me what he thought was wrong with her etc. etc. At the end of all this he told me he was a medical student doing taxi driving to supplement his income. He turned out to be exactly right about what was wrong with her, what medication she'd receive and how the condition would progress!! Indeed he told me more than any doctor ever did.

Whereas the taxi driver I had the other day wanted to know how much our house was and could I explain mortgages to himm, how much DD's school fees were as he'd like to send his dd there (he was driving me to her school), why I only had one child, what my job was and what I was giving my husband for dinner that night. I gave lots of evasive answers and aws glad go get out

heliumballoon · 27/01/2012 12:07

I always just say "really?" in a faint voice and get my phone out and start fiddling with it.
The taxi driver bringing DH to our wedding spent the entire journey complaining about his two divorces and how marriage was pointless. DH didn't tip. Funny that.

ilovesprouts · 27/01/2012 12:12

md dsd2 and my dd once got in a taxi and hes has sn [nightmare round shops] so hes has a mac major elite ,taxi man turned round to me be we got in and said your sons too big for a pram are you a lazy mum wtf [mad] wen i got out i rang the office to complain.

Hullygully · 27/01/2012 12:33

I had a marvellous taxi ride back from an airport at three in the morning with two toddlers and a taxi driver who spent the entire journey telling me that aliens had collected up all the black people from Africa (he was black too) and put around the earth and they were coming back in their spaceship to get them and take them back to the home planet.

TheRhubarb · 27/01/2012 12:39

Hully, how marvellous! I'd LOVE a conversation like that!

OP, report him for downright rudeness. If you didn't get a taxi he wouldn't have had his fare. Bloody cheek!

I hate busybody arseholes.

Lueji · 27/01/2012 12:51

Did you tip him? ;-)