eek the double bed is arriving on Sunday ? ds1 and his girlfriend can I just say no ?

[CreamolaFoamless]

Apperently despite my attempts to get ds1's girlfriend to leave and not be a permenant resident of this house , they (ds1 and ds1's girfriend are arranging to bring down her double bed on Sunday

Would it be unreasonable to say ...no right what.....what the jeff you doing ?

I am so lost ...he's 18 ..she's 18 and I really have no idea who to handle this

Creamola - am I getting you mixed up with someone else or are you the Mner whose DS has a live-in girlfriend who threatens to self harm if he tries to dump her and who says she wants a job as a cleaner? I remember a post where you (if you are the same one) were worried abut your DS missing college and thought having girlfreidn there didn't help.

If so, I thought you were giving them a deadline of January to move out? What happened?

They are taking the p**s and it is time to say no. If you have said before that you don't want her living there permanently and they are completely ignoring you then they obviously think they can do as they like and you won;t put your foot down. Time to get heavy I think and insist. Stick to the January deadline - that gives them until Tuesday. If she has not gone by then just pack her bags and put them on the doorstep. Sounds harsh but if they have been totally ignoring your wishes all this time then they have asked for it IMO

yip 5foot5 that's me

I know I sound like a woose but I'm not , I'm just finding this hard

It's taken me a few months to get my head round things , and initially I was sort of 'blaming' the girlfriend but as time has gone on I'm beginning to realise that this is DS1 who is 'creating/allowing' the situation

For instance, he is at college and stays up playing xbox so is difficult to rouse in the morning.

Yesterday was a nightmare , every morning starts with a fight with me trying to get arse out of bed and go to college

I didn't bother this morning and they are both in his bedroom playing skyrim

I had a little fizz and was blaming the girlfriend for not getting him up and out the door which thinking about is being annoyed with the wrong person IYSWIM

I'm just in a bit of a turmoil over the whole thing , as I've always had a great realtionship with DS1 and these past few months have just confused me