To feel like crying when I see a photo of myself

[WannaBeWildCosMyLifesSoTame]

Like most people I'm never very keen on pictures of myself so I avoid them whenever I can but I've lost quite a lot of weight (3 stone) recently and invested in some decent make-up and skincare (money down the drain as far as I can tell :() so I had hoped that I might look OK in some pictures I was having to get taken for work. I'm sorry to say that wasn't the case.

I've just seen the pics and I look absolutely awful - saggy and wrinkly with either a stupid grin or an expression like I'm about to punch someone, with massive boobs and pasty skin and every pore and blemish glaringly obvious. Worst of all, I don't even look like me - not how I see myself in the mirror anyway. I look old and tired and I can see the most unattractive features of all my relatives staring out at me.

I'm only 38 - do I really have to avoid cameras for the rest of my life just so I don't have to feel this depressed again?

Im opposite..ive gained about 3 stone and look like a pig.
Not even my mum has any pictures of me as i do not EVER have my picture taken under any circs.
I take the picture.

Most people in life are ugly. Luckily most people don't care and just get on with their life. You will be beautiful to your friends.

If they are those passport type pictures (or pics taken for a work pass) they are very unflattering for everybody.

i bet you're not that bad! some people just arent' photogenic, doesn't mean you're a trog

Poor you, some people don't photograph well, I know, I am one too. Try marine collagen pills before bed and good face cream regime. I am nearly 54 and the wrinkly saggy thing is absolute pants.

my passport photo looks like aileen wurnos the american serial killer

I take a very bad photo unless I take it myself when I can get the angle right and not look like a troll who's escaped from the dungeon.

Practise a photo face. It works.

Honestly, most people struggle to look good in photos. There are so many things to consider, lighting, position etc.

Well done on the weight loss. Why not post in Style and Beauty to make sure you are making the best of your new skincare and make-up though? Lots of helpful people over there.

I don't like my face in pictures anymore.

I'm trying hard not be to vain.

Now I know why my Mum cut her head out of pics or stuck a Micky Mouse sticker over her face.

Most of us look a bit off in regular pictures especially in digital!

Don't worry op

I'm sure you look much better in real life! I'm also extremely un-photogenic :(
I just try to make sure any photos of me involve a group of people, so it's not so noticeable...

Totally depends on flash, camera type, lighting and all sorts of factors. Pictures can look nothing like real life so I would ignore them. In my head I am utterly beautiful and ignore any photographic evidence to the contrary.

There are things you can do to look better in photos as Madonna will attest to (photoshop, dim lighting, light reflective make up)... I use iPhone apps to make myself look presentable gorgeous in photos

Well done on all that weight loss.
i avoid photos at all times. i am sure the wise ladies o here can help with confidence.
i am off to bleach my tash!

Get one of those photo sessions done - mine made me look 10 years younger and 3 stone lighter. Then pin that on the fridge and never look at any other pics!

To be fair to you if you are white skinned - no one white looks good in photos on winter. Even the most photogenic people look shit.

I lost over 5 stone and after 10 years of avoiding the camera started to allow pics of me to be taken, as like you I felt I had improved my appearance. I was gutted to see how old and saggy I looked too.

I have to say I think its part age. We get to our late 30's and dont realised exactly how much we are ageing. I recently was looking for an old school mate on FB and ended up looking up loads of old school mates to see if she was on their friends list. I sat there quite shocked at how "aged" all my old school mates looked (I moved away from my home town 20 years ago and am only intouch with 1 person). It then struck me that if they saw a pic of me now, they would probably think the same. I am 39 btw.

I dont mean to depress you but what I am trying to say is sometimes we dont realise what we actually look like and tbh most people our age have probably felt the same or will do very soon. You are not alone.

As for nice pics I took a tip from some photo savvy 19yo's on my college course last year. They told me how to stand. There are certain poses (cringe) I now try and carry off if I see someone snapping my pic. Stand infront of a mirror and try it. Or get a good mate (I got my 12yo) to take several pics of me until I found 2 poses that seem to make me look OK. I am only 5ft tall, so I often have the hit on the head with a mallet look about me , but posing does help (cringe).

I have to say last summer I had a bit of colour to me and I look a million times younger and better in my summer pics. I had a night out in November and looked washed out and ill although I thought I looked fab and felt very healthy indeed. I got my first ever fake tan done for my Xmas do and the photos of me there look a million times better, despite the fact I was feeling quite run down at the time.

I have to say I am no photogenic and dont enjoy getting my pic taken at all but my DC mentioned there are no pics of me in the family album which they were sad about. Its true there are not because after seeing my wedding photos I weeped and weeped cos I looked frankly vile and I didnt have a pic taken for 10+ years.

Hope some of this helps.

I think I look ok in RL but in photos, I look like a big shiny lemon face

Another unphotogenic one over here

Start sweating when people tell me they have a super duper mega pixel camera that takes crystal clear photos.... Not of me you aint!

Sepia soft focus is the way to go

I'm 49 and not only avoid getting photos taken now, I've added not looking at my face in the mirror when out shopping to my list - I think my passport pic is my best photo, but I was taken about 9 years sadly :(

Ever wondered why Posh always looks so glum in pics? She hates the way she looks too, and has a teensy bit of a 'wattle' from losing so much weight, so she sticks her tongue to the roof of her mouth which draws her neck up.

Works - try it in a mirror - but you have a choice between smiley pics with a bit of a chin, or skinny pics looking like a dog's just eaten your lettuce leaf lunch...

I'm not sure anyone on this planet thinks they look great in pics. We spent 2 months traipsing round Peru this summer. 4500 pics - I kids you not - loads of me (bless DP) and 3 of them have been deemed passable. They were ones where, surprise, it was sunny, I wasn't posing, he caught my good side, I was happy and grinning...

And did you read the HIDEOUS interview with Keira Knightley in the ST yesterday? I paraphrase but basically he said the harsh light in the interview room did her no favours. If someone can miaow like that about HER, well...

Main thing is WELL BLOOMIN DONE on the 3 stone. It'll take a while for things to ping back. In the meantime, keep yourself hydrated inside and out.

I always look shite on photos too. I always look fat (when really I'm not) and ALWAYS pull the most stupid expressions. I either look stoned or overly happy (grinning like a loon). I'm pale as hell and make-up just makes me orange.

Hmmm - goth or orange, what look should I go for today?

Thankfully I'm getting passed caring.

I look appalling in photos. Like I've got a really drastic lazy eye. The difference IRL is minuscule but in photos I look like Quasimodo.

I look unrecognisable in photos too. Wonky-faced, pink and shiny and as though I should be in some kind of medical textbook.

I know in theory my best photos are taken from above, with my eyes looking up to the camera, pulling my most fake, unnatural-feeling smile. It feels bloody weird but I do end up looking half-decent. Unfortunately I rarely have the luxury of choosing the angle or even knowing the photo is about to be taken.

You are probably one of those people whose faces come alive when they speak, so IRL your face is taking on so many different expressions that it's impossible to capture 'you' in a photographic still. Photogenic people probably have blank expressions most of the time.

Oh dear! I am SO sorry. I am sure you are lovely but perhaps the photographer wasn't great or the lighting washed you out? I am not bad looking but honestly I look completely vile in 99% of photos! Just not photogenic!

I feel your pain, Wannabe. I usually see a decent-looking person when I look in the mirror (I have studied my 'mirror pose' for some time now and know how to avoid my worst angles). However, when I look at photos of myself I frequently think: "Who is that chubby, pasty, scruffy woman with a nose so big you could hang your coat on?" The only bearable pictures of myself seem to be those when I was caught unawares but even then, I am hyper critical of my every pore and line. On the plus side, I would rather like my image IRL than in pictures and not the other way around as I can easily avoid the latter but I've got to live with the former, like it or lump it...

I think I'm gorgeous - so do my friends and family.
In reality I'm a fatty, with wrinkly eyes, too many chins and dimples all over.

Don't believe the photos - a good photographer will capture the inner you - clearly you've been photographed by a nasty amateur in bad lighting.
Congrats on the weight loss and spring isn't far off - you'll get some colour then. Until spring arrives, a little blusher can do wonders to balance the face out.