alternative forms of swearing

[devonshiredumpling]

i do not want my lo to swear because of me so have any of you guys got any alternative sayings for lifes little mishaps that are suitable for los ears

Sugar is a perfectly fine replacement for shit :)

Freckles replaces the word fuck here

Door locks = Bollocks

Sugar = Shit

Can't think of any more

My mate got me into the stupid habit of shouting "Oh bumbags!" when the kids were little and it stuck

Brother Tucker here

My DS says 'Oh my blimey'!!

Blooming eck
Flipping eck
Well I'll be blowed (would I be so bloody lucky)
Blimey o riley
for crying out loud
and if it all goes wrong, "pardon my French"

probably not the correct answer but I swear a lot. I do! Not proud of it but I swear.Have 3 DCs, two of them older teens, and not one of them swear in my hearing anyway. Even if they let slip a "bloody" they immediately apologise. So growing up around swearing doesn't necessarily mean they will grow up cursing like navvies. Just because you do it, doesn't mean they can do it. Unfair? Possibly. Life? yeah, suck it up.

DD2 is 2 YO and I've noticed I'm not able to cut out the swearing as much as I did with DD1.

I've ended up doing a bit of a les dawson mouthing of the word itself, just saying the first letter

Thinking I've got away with it will come back and bite me on the arse no doubt, probably with her revealing her new vocab in the quiet of the libarary or some such

Sugar balls!
Pants!

'Oh my blimey'!!

Blasphemy and offensive - it means 'God, Blind me'.

My mum would say "bloody" and "bugger" most of the time... woe betide me if I ever repeated or used it. I never did. I alway understood that grown ups could swear, children couldnt. I knew if I swore, particularly AT someone, I would have had a smarting red handprint on my backside. So I never swore as a child.

I swear like a trooper now, but never in front of kids.

My mum never swore, and I remember the I felt when I heard her say 'Oh balls!' one day

When we were older we used to dare her into saying 'fuck off' because she claimed never to have said it

I think I was about 35 the first time I heard my mum say Shit... and I just went

fiddle-sticks.

oh, I supposed to be streaking.

see I run fast, and not like a duck.

growing up, my dad's every other word was either fuck or cunt and both myself and my sister never really swore still don't now, I wouldn't worry too much as long as you teach them when it is and isn't appropriate

Fluffy Kittens for Fuck...worked on criminally hardened, but adorable, teens I worked with...they made it their in-joke

My Mother hates Bloody ...Fuck, shite, and arsehole pass by her without comment though...what's that all about?

troisgarcons

Most swearing is blasphemous if you look at it that way:

"Hell" - preceded by various

"Christ on a bike" and variants

"OMG" - this really pisses me off ("Piss" - not blasphemous)

Damn, darn, blimey, bloody, etc - all related to Christian images etc.

Fuck, cunt (I hate that but it works in this context), arse, bollocks etc - not blasphemous but probly not what one would want your DC to be saying!

I still don't ever swear in front of my parents and I'm 32!

I say 'flibidiflob' and once embarrassingly shouted out 'OH SHHHHHHHAMONE!' much to the mirth of my colleagues.

My mother had just had an operation on her foot and the silly sod had it raised on a chair just behind a closed door... When I opened the door and banged her foot she screamed 'FFFFFFFFFFFFARTADUCK!'

i find the north/south divide quite interesting

I am from the north and it was never appropriate to swear in front of, or to an elder, (parent, grandparent, aunt, elderly neighbour)... even as an adult, and I have lived down south (london) now for over ten years and it is much more acceptable for teen and adult children to swear in front of parents etc..

I'm another swearer whose DD has not picked it up (at least not in my hearing) and I have never had to be hypocritical and say so - she has just never done it.

I quite like 'PooBumWillies' as an alternative, though. Not sure if that is still too strong for you...

arsehole - cunt
cunt - bastard
bastard - twat
twat - shithead
shithead - motherfucker

What the FLIP is going on here? I use that a lot.
For the love of Pete! (or, for the love of Mike!)
Oh for crying out loud!
Jeez Louise!
Yikes!

When I'm really shocked I do sometimes come out with 'Holy Mary Mother of God' which would still come under 'taking the Lord's name in vain' category of swearing, and I'm not even Catholic, so I don't know where I picked it up from.

Actually, thinking about it, I dislike hearing children use most alternatives as much as I dislike the actual words. They need to learn when it is appropriate - in their case, never - not find an alternative.

If it's for a stubbed toe/burned finger or similar, "Ow, ow ow!" would work wouldn't it?

And "Shove off" is probably better than any of the alternatives (although probably not one you'd really want them to copy ).

I thought this would be easy, because I hardly ever swear, but it's very difficult!

we go for 'sparkling' for the f word.. it also makes me laugh so helps break the tension
imagine 6ft5 dp ' why does no one ever close the sparking fridge door'