not to take newborn ds to hospital to meet mil?

[harassedandherbug]

This is not a mil thread .

She's been in hospital for months and will prob be in for at least another 2 months. It's a surgical problem, not an actual illness as such.

Ds is nearly 3wks old and dh obviously wants to take him to meet his mum, but I was a bit dubious because of the risk of infection. I had a word with hv and she said not to take him unless we absolutely had to. Dh is absolutely fine with this but I know for a fact that some members of the family will comment, so AIBU about this?

thats not even slightly true, bobble. My toddler doesn't harbour MRSA, does yours?

I feel sad for the old lady who's in hospital and isn't able to see her new grandchild. I would do whatever I could to get them together. I would agree with those who suggest getting them both warmly wrapped up and meeting outdoors. Or maybe in cafe or somewhere else away from ward.

I think yabu to be honest - was she born in a hospital - you're talking about one visit?

Dont take risks with your tiny baby.
Babies ARE born in hosptial but hen ds3 was born prematurely, when the paediatrician released him his words were "Take him home before he catches something"

Completely separately, my dd died at 7 weeks old and the guilt of what if I had done this, that or the other differently will be with me forever. If your' baby were to catch something, you wouldn't forgive yourself.

MIL will get to see her gs eventually in a hice home setting.

I think people misunderstand MRSA, lots of people do harbour it with no ill effects, you are screened when admitted to hospital and put in a side room if it shows up on a swab. This doesn't mean that you are ill from MRSA, it just reduces the chances of more vulnerable people being infected. C-Diff is misunderstood too.

Hmm I think I wouldn't risk it tbh, there are several nasties floating about in a general ward, more in Medical but still. Maternity is different as patients are not generally ill when admitted, although obviously any confined area with lots of people coming and going provides a good breeding ground.

I used to work on a general medical ward and was paranoid about all of the various nasties I was exposed to . Especially TB and Hep B/C, I was in children's A&E with a ds with a cut head recently (had to drag the whole troop along), I did think that it was the perfect place to pick up some horrible bug, lots of toy sharing. Sure as night follows day we all come down with a horrible lurgy a few days after.

Thank you for all your opinions, about 50/50 I reckon.

The decision has (to my relief tbh) been taken out of our hands as the ward won't allow ds to visit. To be perfectly honest though, we wouldn't have gone against hv advice and taken him, as a pp said, I would never have forgiven myself if he did catch something. I don't know the situation at present, but the hospital had a couple of wards closed due to norovirus.

Mil isn't well enough to leave the ward either. Without wanting to sound horrible (famous last words!) she's not some sweet little old lady in bits about not seeing new grandson. She's early 50's and hardly sees any of her grandchildren unless we go to her. This health prob is a new thing so that's not a preventing factor. Dh has a very hot & cold relationship with her due to an appalling childhood, he'd be taken into care these days. But we do see her and make sure the kids do at least have some kind of relationship with her.

chiomonkey I'm so sorry to hear about your dd. You're right, I would never forgive myself if he picked up anything. Particularly as he's already struggling with reflux.

Just to point out that maternity wards are not "hospital".
Hospitals and gps are good places to catch infectious diseases.

At the time I was even advised not to travel by plane with a month old DS, let alone a non essential visit to hospital.

Maternity wards in a hospital are not hospital? Quite clearly they are.

actually maternity wards are more "dirty" than elective surgery wards because it's not like they can turn you away from mat ward if you're filthy are riddled with bugs, but with elective surgery they pre assess and swab and turn away if the person booked in comes down with V&D when they were due to come in for their pre booked op.

With elective surgery patients often have to go into a clinic a few weeks before to be swabbed and treated for MRSA if needed. Not so with maternity wards, they get people comming in who've never attended antenatal care at all (hence the incentive of health in pregnancy grant).

Infection rates are much much lower on maternity wards than other areas of hospitals and so the risks are not comparable. I wouldnt take him in unless she wasnt going to be coming out.

maybe overall on average, but comapred to ELECTIVE surgical? I very much doubt it!

we don't know which type of surgical ward the MIL is on, if its surgical admissions then sure cross infection is probably higher than maternity, but if its surgical admissions then its probaby very very clean and the risk is more from visitor to patient than the other way round

maternity ward, don't have many infections where as the genreal wards do...even surgical as you can't swab someone who need emergency surgery ect.

i am a hospital cleaner and there would be no way i would take my DC into hospital unless nessersary.

So glad the decision has been taken out of your hands. I can completely understand the ward policy of no non-essential visits for children and babies and my advice to you would have been to avoid visiting your MIL in hospital with your newborn.

When DS was 12wk old I got very ill with cholecystitis and was blue-lighted to hospital. DS had to come with me as he was exclusively breastfed and wouldn't take a bottle. I was admitted for 4 nights, whilst they stabilised me, then for a further 3 nights (a week later, once I'd completed the antibiotics) to have surgery and throughout that time DS was with me - we were in a private room on a gynae ward, the only suitable place for us. Within 1 day of being discharged the second time we were rushed into hospital again (!) with DS. He was admitted to paediatrics with a fever of 40c, vomiting, listless and covered in a rash - within hours he was on a drip, given a lumbar puncture and looked seriously, seriously ill. The paediatrician uttered these words that I'll never forget, 'We prepare for the worst and hope for the best.' and he told me they suspected bacterial menigitis. He began treatment for meningitis whilst we waited on the results. Thankfully, the results for menigitis came back clear, but he had contracted rotavirus A gastroenteritis and the peadiatrician said it will have been as a result of his hospital stays with me. Those hours and days watching my son so lifeless were honestly the worst of my life.

I would not take a child or baby to hospital, unless it was necessary - the risk just isn't worth it.

McHappyPants, that is why, as you'll probably know, there are two different kinds of surgical wards, emergency admissions and elective.