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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to get DD (2) up at 4.30am five mornings a week?

101 replies

PuffofSmoke · 13/01/2012 19:10

It's either that or give up work :(

Have been doing it for 4 months now and she doesn't seem to suffer from it. Every bloody day someone (my mum, mil, sil, friends, work colleagues etc) comments about how cruel it is. :(

OP posts:

BandOMothers · 13/01/2012 19:43

There is every chance she'd be up by then anyway! one of mine was at that age! Don't worry! DH and she have their nap...she's fine!

mrsscoob · 13/01/2012 19:43

agree with marriedinwhite, lovely post

nenevomito · 13/01/2012 19:43

I get my children up at 6am every morning so I can get to work on time. They repay the favour by getting me up at 5.30 every weekend the gits

HavePatience · 13/01/2012 19:44

marriedinwhite you are lovely

MrsSleepy glad you get lie in on weekends.

Nosey about what job only does business in early mornings!

Original poster

PuffofSmoke · 13/01/2012 19:45

Thank you for the lovely comments. married - will make getting up at silly o'clock tomorrow a little bit easier when I think of your post!

I am a glutton for punishment and am studying with the OU just now as well do who knows one day I might get a more sociable, better job.

OP posts:

MrsSnaplegs · 13/01/2012 19:46

Marriedinwhite that is a fantastic post and has said everything that should be said

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere · 13/01/2012 19:49

YANBU. You do what you gotta do! Try not to worry what others say. Easier said than done, I know.

(I take my hat off to your CM for starting that early! I thought I had an early start as a CM a few years ago with a 6am drop off. 0

TheProvincialLady · 13/01/2012 19:50

I would guess that when she is old enough to go to school you will need to make changes, such as getting a nanny to come to your house while she is still asleep, so that she can cope with school hours. But for now, if she is getting enough sleep it doesn't matter whether she gets it 5pm-5am or 8pm-8am.

Heleninahandcart · 13/01/2012 19:51

Wow. You have my utmost respect for managing this. Of course your DD is not suffering, what difference does it make if she goes to bed early. She also has a lovely nap with her Dad every day.

Unfortunately some shortsighted judgy people just don't get what working parents sometimes have to go through.

RabidEchidna · 13/01/2012 19:52

I think you are going to have major problems once she starts school

RabidEchidna · 13/01/2012 19:53

I think you are going to have major problems once she starts school

Original poster

PuffofSmoke · 13/01/2012 19:57

Fingers crossed rabid if I get off mumsnet I work very hard I will have my degree in the next 18 months or so and can start sensible job hunting! At least when she goes to school DH will be back from work and have had a sleep for her finishing and they can have the afternoon together.

OP posts:

marriedinwhite · 13/01/2012 19:59

OP and others - my youngest is nearly 14 and when she is a mummy and if she is facing a few challenges one day I hope I am still fit enough and live close enough to her to do what some of your cms do a couple of days a week or will be able to have her lo's for the night once a week to give everyone a break. I had my dc quite late so fingers crossed.

PS: They don't remember much of what happens before they are about four and a half providing they are loved and secure

INeedADollar · 13/01/2012 20:01

Why would OP have major problems once her DD is at school? I don't think you can categorically say that's the case! My DS has always been a ridiculously early riser and he copes ok with a full school day. Don't be so negative. OP you are doing what you have to do, your DD is probably very used to it by now and as long as she's getting enough sleep over a 24 hour period I don't think it matters what times. I think you're wonderful

Original poster

PuffofSmoke · 13/01/2012 20:04

My mum is very good at having DD overnight when she can along with doing a few loads of my washing and ironing. Trying to persuade her to retire (she is nearly 66!) but she is having none of it! Guess I got my work ethic from her!

OP posts:

marriedinwhite · 13/01/2012 20:09

Bet she worries herself sick about you. Get her on here so I can pm her and tell her you would sleep better if she told you you were a brilliant mum every day! Bet she's transferring her angst for you onto comments about it not being right for your daughter. Bet she really means "I don't like you doing this and I wish things were easier for MY daugher".

RainboweBrite · 13/01/2012 20:11

I take my hat off to you, OP, as the only way I could be up that early is if it's from the night before! Here, have some .

thanksamillion · 13/01/2012 20:11

FWIW with the starting school issue (which you hope won't be an issue anyway), my 6yo DD is up for 6 hours before she starts school (we're abroad, really odd system where she goes to school in the afternoon). It just means that we shift things around so she does homework in the mornings, plays, chills out a bit, and then after school there isn't much time between home, dinner and bed. She seems to cope and although I don't think it's ideal it is doable. Your DD would just have to keep an early bed time to make sure she got enough sleep.

sashh · 14/01/2012 06:53

What exactly is the harm?

TroublesomeEx · 14/01/2012 07:08

OP They are projecting because they wouldn't want to get up at 4.30am.

What difference does it make to your 2 year old who has no concept of time, no concept of early or late and no social conventions to dictate these to her?

When my DS was a that age I commuted to university in a different city with him everyday. We caught 2 trains each way and I didn't drive so walked the non-train parts of the journey. We were out of the house for 12 hours most days.

I had similar comments - but DS wasn't bothered or affected by it in the slightest. He was generally an angel but whenever he did play up or whatever my mum used to say "well after all you expect so much from him. So much more than a 2/3/4 year old is capable of" Really?

What you are doing is amazing and would put a lot of other people to shame.

I can guarantee that in a few years time when this is not your life you will look back on it and wonder how you managed it!

runningwilde · 14/01/2012 07:52

The problem is when the LO starts school - she will be uses to this and will struggle to cope. I'm sorry but I think yabvu to do this to a young child. 4.30am is far too early, it is not 6am or 6.30am, it is 4.30am! Im not saying this horribly buy it is unfair to the child and setting up potential problems when child goes to school etc. So yes, yabu I'm afraid.

Sirzy · 14/01/2012 07:56

Runningwilde how do you know what the child will and wont cope with? As long as she is still getting a decent sleep there is no reason to think she wouldn't cope. That said a lot can change in 2 years anyway!

changeforthebetter · 14/01/2012 08:01

Oh for FFS - this is a 2 year old. Why the hysteria about school?
OP I am sure she will be absolutely fine. You sound like a really sensible, hardworking woman. I bet your mum does wish your life was a bit easier but, hey ho, not everyone can afford nannies or give up work on a whim. You've got a couple of years before the school issue arises and even then, as others have pointed out various children, including my lovely DD2, get up before sparrowfart and are absolutely fine. I get up at 0530, as does DD2 (preschooler) and we cope.

I hope you do get a break occasionally though. In the meantime,

McPhee · 14/01/2012 08:03

You sound like an amazing mum doing amazing things to make your life work. Lets face it, you could have taken the easy route and sat on your arse, but no you are out there earning the crust to support your family. Well done you, you should be proud of yourself as others have said

Runningwilde

HavePatience · 14/01/2012 08:04

So runningwilde would you then suggest she not work therefore starve and not be able to study and get out of this job? what would you suggest, exactly?

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