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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be fuming..

35 replies

lookingforaflatshare · 11/01/2012 17:06

I realise this may encourage lots of people to attack my choice of being vegetarian, but I am posting here to get the most replies quickly as I'm not sure how to handle this. My daughter attends nursery, and yesterday when they gave me her daily sheet it said that she had been fed chicken for lunch. As we are both vegetarian I challenged that and they said no, they just copied that, and she had eaten lentil stew. Today she has had very loose/smelly/profuse poos and when I just changed her I noticed several pieces of what looked like (I think) chicken. It was whitish and fibrous. I was about to phone nursery to confront this as I have made it very clear I don't want her fed meat but thought I should check mumsnet's wisdom on the matter. Would chicken look like this in a nappy? What to do?

OP posts:
Flisspaps · 11/01/2012 17:09

I wouldn't be able to identify chicken in DD's nappy.

I would imagine that lentil stew would produce very smelly, loose and lots of poo though.

I think you've already challenged them about this and have reiterated that your DD is a vegetarian and they have given you an answer so phoning to say the same again isn't going to help.

HowToLookGoodGlaikit · 11/01/2012 17:10

Chicken would have probably been disgested, and would only cause the symptoms you describe if it was off/not cooked properly.

thisisyesterday · 11/01/2012 17:10

i have no idea if chicken would look like that in a nappy but i would be very, very angry with the nursery if it turned out she had been given meat

not sure where you go from here though if they deny it...

StrandedBear · 11/01/2012 17:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GypsyMoth · 11/01/2012 17:11

Well after many kids I have NEVER seen chicken in a nappy!

Original poster
lookingforaflatshare · 11/01/2012 17:13

I feed dd lentil stew lots at home and have never had this problem, so I doubt it's that. Also what was in her nappy was most definitely not lentils. My issue is that they have lied to me if it is chicken, as well as ignoring my wishes, and possibly harmed dd as a result.

OP posts:
troisgarcons · 11/01/2012 17:13

If you have never eaten meat, your body would be incapable of digesting it and it would make you very ill (Biiiiiiiiiiiiiig discussion on this in Science today)

GypsyMoth · 11/01/2012 17:14

Well take the 'proof' in to show them all Grin

ragged · 11/01/2012 17:14

Peas, raisins, bits of carrot, those things are often identifiable in nappies. Not much else, ime.

usualsuspect · 11/01/2012 17:14

I've never seen chicken in a nappy either, I've seen sweetcorn though

and now chicken in a basket nappy is making me laugh Grin

CharminglyOdd · 11/01/2012 17:15

Agree that not being used to digesting meat could give you an upset stomach (I had this when I stopped being veggie).

Is it possible that a new member of staff made a mistake? I doubt they will have done this maliciously... it's not worth the loss of business.

Original poster
lookingforaflatshare · 11/01/2012 17:15

Strandedbear I really don't want to turn this into a thread about vegetarianism as I think it has been done ad nauseum in the past. In short I am keeping her vegetarian till she is old enough to make an informed decision herself, as there is a lot of research to show that a vegetarian diet is healthier than an omnivorous diet. This is not something I want to debate though, it's my choice.

OP posts:
ragged · 11/01/2012 17:15

How does that work for babies, 3garcons? I mean, all of us at one time had "never" eaten meat, and yet very few of us had dramatic reactions that first time we ever had it.

SiamoNellaMerda · 11/01/2012 17:16

Forensic nappy inspector and all round militant veggie? Way to go OP. You cannot know for sure without actual real proof and if you go in there shouting the odds and with the attitude you have here you won't get very far!

RitaMorgan · 11/01/2012 17:16

Strandedbear, don't be silly! She isn't old enough to decide to eat meat either. Before our children are old enough to make their own decisions we have to decide for them.

How old is your dd OP? I used to see whole bits of undigested stuff in ds's nappy when he was very newly weaned, but not since. It sounds plausible to me that the nursery just made a mistake in writing her day sheet.

I would maybe ask them though what measures they have in place to ensure each child receives the correct meal - for example vegetarians sit at a different table, or colour coded lunch mats.

Original poster
lookingforaflatshare · 11/01/2012 17:16

Charminglyold She just moved to a new room, so I thought that may be why. I did remind them that she is vegetarian though.

OP posts:
Bucharest · 11/01/2012 17:16

They've told you she ate lentils. You think she ate chicken. She's presumably not old enough to tell you herself...with the best will in the world, what can you actually do? Apart from sending the nappy to forensics?

Original poster
lookingforaflatshare · 11/01/2012 17:20

Siamo I don't inspect her nappies, it was quiet obvious ahem that something was amiss! My dd is 15 months old. I'm also hardly militant, but it is important to me personally that my dd is not fed meat until she is old enough to make an informed decision at to what she is eating (maybe age 5?).

OP posts:
SenoritaViva · 11/01/2012 17:21

I understand your frustration but you have already queried this. Like someone else said, I'd doubt it was malicious. can you have a quiet word with the Manager to check that her dietary requirements are communicated properly, correctly and regularly?

aldiwhore · 11/01/2012 17:24

Maybe as the lentil stew at nursery is a different lentil stew than the one you have at home that could be a reason? Or maybe she's got a bit of a cold? My eldest shows the first signs of a bug via the loo... he's not veggie, but I've never been able to identify whatever he eats.

I would ask again, explain why you're asking. If they give you the same answer then they're either lying or telling the truth, there is no way to prove it really is there?

piratecat · 11/01/2012 17:25

well you can't be sure. just reiterate to them she is veggie.

could well be she has a dodgy tummy/poo from the lentil stew they made tbh.

Original poster
lookingforaflatshare · 11/01/2012 17:30

Re the lentil stew, it is a rolling menu in the nursery, which she has been at for several months. Therefore I don't think that could be the issue, unless they prepared it differently this month. Also what was in her nappy was 100% not lentils.

OP posts:
ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 11/01/2012 17:30

You have to take them at their word. The loose poo could be anything, you wouldn't have thought she had eaten chicken if you hadn't seen an apparent mistake on her sheet.
My DS is also being raised fish eating veggie and I do have moments of anxiety when he tells me he ate ham for eg- but the staff all know he doesn't get given meat, and I have to trust that they are following our wishes. You can't have 100% control when she isn't with you do you need to make your wishes clear and trust what they say to you. Anything else leads to paranoia IMO.

KinkyDorito · 11/01/2012 17:33

I'm vege, only recently gave DS some chicken - first ever meat he had - and it made no difference to his stools.

KinkyDorito · 11/01/2012 17:34

He has, however, had some very interesting nappies from lentils, and nights awake with stomach pain after eating them.