To tell ds no in a raised voice when out??

[MamaMaiasaura]

Ok shopping is hell on earth on a Saturday in town, but we went with 3 dc in the hope of spending ther as money in sales on something nice for them. Ds is just 4 and was tired and playing up. After running off, laying on floor, jumping on beds in John Lewis (all whilst dh was "meant" to be in charge) I finally stepped in and raised my voice to a NO. This was on hos level. To which I was really scowled and tutted at. Really pissed me off all these judgey people (older women today), who clearly think I'm a shit parent. Rant over

yanbu, really pisses me off other peoples reactions when parents correct their kids behaviour in public - would they prefer that you continued to let your son misbehave

sorry for typos. Should have read their Xmas money.

and they were spending it on a bed :)

YABU for attempting town on a saturday morning

The sort of people who tut when you discipline your own children in public will be the same ones who tut when they are jumping on beds - they can't have it both ways....YANBU!.

(When I was heavily pg with DC3, my DD was having a full on, kicking and screaming tantrum in M&S because I refused to buy sweets - two old ladies walked passed, tutted and in stage whispers said "I can't believe she's having another one, she can't control the ones she has". I was so pregnant and hormonal angry, that I said in my best RP, "I do apologise for my daughter's behaviour - but if you have a better solution as to how to stop her having a tantrum, I'd really love to hear your helpful advice". They did have the grace to blush and walk on.....)

I do. Possibly every time I go out. The people you see for a minute or so when your kids are misbehaving miss you when they are being lovely!

I'm afraid I tut at the people who don't reprimand their children in public.

They were probably tutting at the behaviour of the kids rather than you saying 'no' in a loudish voice.

Lol @ panic. Really wish I'd said something witty now but I was frazzled

Titanic - yup u r right re Saturday shopping. Utter madness

Always amazes me that so many people tut at kids being, well - kids! Children will have a tantrum, they will play up from time to time. I can't believe that all these tutters and frowners don't have children and I don't believe that once upon a time it wasn't them out and about with a child chucking themselves on the floor or otherwise playing up.

So what the hell? [boggle] Amnesia?

Re the no - I find that singing it at them is very effective "No no nonono, no no nonono, no no nonono no noooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

So if you are out and about and you come across a woman singing (badly) the no no song at two rather embarassed looking lads, say hi to me

I tut when people DON'T discipline their children... :)

loving the noooo no no nooo nooo song

If you like that, you'll go crazy for the dance that goes along with it...

If you do it right, the kids will NEVER play you up in public because they just can't handle the shame.

I couldn't care less who tuts. Ds is only 2 but if he hits/bites or is otherwise physically aggressive in anger he gets put in the corner, and if that's in John Lewis and the corner is behind a sofa, that's where he goes. We are absolutely consistent about it and a lot of that, for me, is having grown up in terror of my cousins who were never reprimanded for anything and having seen dh's siblings struggle with this sort of thing with their kids because they didn't really tackle it from the outset (and will tell you this themselves, and have warned us not to follow in their footsteps).

There's no shouting at his age, and because he knows the drill he actually usually goes willingly if sometimes a tiny bit grumblingly (e.g. are you ready to be calm now? "No way mummy"). It usually takes less than a minute, we try not to get in anyone's way and he jumps up and says "sorry mummy" and we are on our way. It has only happened maybe 3 times in public and EVERY SINGLE TIME there has been audible tutting, as though I were publically flogging him . A lot of people seem to think toddlers shouldn't be reprimanded for anything, even when they are clearly kicking/hitting/biting in anger. I don't agree. I don't particularly care what their thoughts are so tut away ladies, tut away...

It's always those 'older' women that tut too isn't it?

I'm with Annie. I used to give them a warning then count down from ten and blast off like a rocket. It would usually stop them and as they got older they would not dare to misbehave due to the embarrassment factor.

They are teens now but if they play up when we are out they have to do the Gnomeo and Juliet dance before they are allowed in the car.
Ds1's girlfriend was amazed to have to do this, when on holiday with us in the Summer

Seriously, I work in retail and much prefer parents that tell their kids to behave when messing around.

I'm an older woman , I like tutting

Are you sure they weren't tutting because your DC hadn't been told off until he did a number of things - especially as they were older women. I admit I have judged parents who let their kids run riot and then belatedly tell them off.

DS knows I do the same at home as out. He usually behaves or quickly learns to.

YANBU

at usual.
My NY resolution is to tut loudly and often.
I've been letting the MAWs down with my total lack of tutting.
This is going to change so I'll fit into the old gimmer stereotype.

One of my mates years ago had that happen, and she said to the old bat that she was enforcing discipline now so that DC would not grow up to be the sort of people who would mug old people like herself. Seemed fair to me.

Old Bat .

I'm not "older" but I still enjoy a good tut!

Me and my mum both had a good old tut at a woman in a p&c parking space with her tween earlier...

I reserve the right to raise my voice at my own children at all times and in all places.
I also reserve the right to raise my voice at other peoples children if their parents are doing nothing to prevent them misbehaving.
I also don't give a monkeys if their teachers shout at them.
I'm a very old fashioned soul, I believe certain levels of behaviour are non negotiable.
If you are the sort of person who can get results with a look and a quiet word I'm , but I can't and I'm quite immune to being rutted at.