To be upset by what has been said about my son

[Everyothercloud]

I am new here and would like as much advice as possible. My ds is now in yr 3, when he was in yr 1 I heard from a family friend that she had been contacted by a neighbour concerned that a mother at my ds school had been spoken to by a teacher to say ds had licked her son privates. As soon as I was told I phoned and demanded to speak to head, she said she would speak to teacher and get back to me. She did and said they had no record of anything related to my ds, she said there was an incident last year but nothing to do with my ds, she said she has spoken to parent involved and feels it just a bit of gossip and not to make an issue of it, which I didn't, but my ds 2 years later has no real friends, doesn't get invited anywhere and I am so snubbed I detest going up the school. Honest opinions please because I feel so angry or am I paranoid?

No idea if this is real or not but the way I read the op is that an incident did take place but not involving her son and the head was suggesting that what was being said about her son was gossip based on this.
OP I would have approached the person who said this about your son at the time saying that you have spoken to the school and no such thing had happened and you would appreciate it if she passed that information on to the people she's been gossiping with. I don't know what else you expected the head to do? Make an announcement in assembly stating that Everyotherclouds son hasn't licked anyone's privates?

I would go into school and have a chat about friendship issues and what causes problems and find out what you can do to help. I wouldn't go back to some incident that happened 2 and a half years ago.

you have to put the licking gossip to one side and get on with working out what the real problem is. can he do after school activities outside of school. can you help him find the skills to make friends. can you invite his friends back - and keep doing this.

Try this amazon book. Great top reviews. The Unwritten Rules of Friendship: Simple Strategies to Help Your Child Make Friends

Op , what is bothering you most about this?

The fact that others are spreading untrue rumours about DS?

Or

The way the school handled it?

Fwiw
I recall similar rumours at my school over 40 years ago

Also, have I got this right?

Your reason for posting here is you are concerned because your ds has no friends and does not seem to fit in.

You are now wondering if this is because of the rumour that was spread 2 y ago ?

You have posted along similar lines before, have you not?

As far as i can remember you were having anxiety issues and paranoia, which seemed to focus on your son, is that right?

If you are a different person with a similar user name, then i am sorry.

If you are that person, did you go to your GP, as advised, by many, myself included, on the other thread?

Oh yes, can people stop giving insults, sometimes people with MH issues use these boards. At least ask correct questions, before blocking someone off from possibly getting help.

I have delt with many parents who have MH and thoughts/senarios, such as these, it is usually an indication that meds are no longer working. Their child becomes their focus. The school should have contacted SS over this.